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[Elephant Parade]

You are adventurers; each of you has a unique power, job, skill, trait, or item. You have decided to explore the Dungeon of Doom, because it (hopefully) contains cool stuff. Unfortunately, you've run into several goblins! Oh no! Goblins are almost as dangerous as rats, and your village lost five people to rats in the last week!

The rats might have been possessed, though.

Floor: 1F
Room: A small room; the walls, floor, and ceiling are all carved from stone. There is a door to the north, and a staircase leading upward to the south.
Foes: Goblin Swordsman, Goblin Archer, Goblin Shaman, Goblin Trainee

[Coolrune206]

My name is Jeff, and I have been blessed by the goddess Lymilark with incredible and inexplicable Luck, to the point where I can run through a rainstorm for one mile without a single drop landing upon me.

Charging directly at the goblins, Jeff joyfully waved his generic sword, preparing to assault the frontmost goblin.

[Paphi]

My name is Phil, and I have Orthnalof, Sword of Morrlokai the Barbarous, He Who Slew Many And Impregnated Many More, and with my mighty sword and Flimsy Driftwood Shield will carve the treacherous goblins into Delicate Origami Shapes!

[Elephant Parade]

My name is Jeff, and I have been blessed by the goddess Lymilark with incredible and inexplicable Luck, to the point where I can run through a rainstorm for one mile without a single drop landing upon me.

Charging directly at the goblins, Jeff joyfully waved his generic sword, preparing to assault the frontmost goblin.

Jeff the Blessed possesses [Super Luck], believed to be the blessing of the goddess Lymilark.

[1+1] Jeff trips over a stone and falls flat on his face. His luck prevents him from getting any broken bones, but he winds up with a few bruises.

My name is Phil, and I have Orthnalof, Sword of Morrlokai the Barbarous, He Who Slew Many And Impregnated Many More, and with my mighty sword and Flimsy Driftwood Shield will carve the treacherous goblins into Delicate Origami Shapes!

Phil the Angry has [Orthnalof], the sword of a legendary barbarian. You also have a driftwood shield.

[5+1] With a single, huge swing, Jeff cuts down the front three goblins. The trainee cowers in fear.

...Oh, and he also cut down a support pillar. The roof looks pretty heavy...


[6]The goblin flees, screaming for help. The scream was loud enough to weaken the walls even more! The roof will probably cave in on this room next turn.

It looks like you won't get to loot those corpses! A shame, that.

Spoiler: Heroes (click to show/hide)

Coolrune206 / Jeff the Blessed: [Bruised] / [Super Luck]
Paphi / Phil the Angry: Fine / [Orthnalof], Driftwood Shield

A reminder: the exit staircase is to the south; a door is to the north.

[blazing glory]

I am Joe, I have a Magical Imp named Jim.

Tell Jim to save us and our loot.

[lawastooshort]

I am Blind Nigel, wandering Banjoist and Banjo-possessor. I have travelled many lands, playing and learning with the finest musicians and voyage to perfect my art.

Play a song that describes our tragic predicament in such a way as to boost my comrades’ morale and effectiveness. Base it on a traditional acoustic country style.

[Coolrune206]

Jeff screams and makes a run for the doorway to the North.

[LordBrassroast]

I am an Elven Ranger Sylvarris, and I have Super Aiming Skills. I have a Cheap Bow of Long-Range Stabby and 5 flint arrows. I also have Standard Cotton Clothing.

I shoot an arrow at the closest goblin.

EDIT: NO I RUN THE HELL AWAY

[Dustan Hache]

I am Aralak Darkstone , the Necromancer. I have Access to healing and Reviving magicks.I also have a damaged oakwood staff, and some snazzy gray cotton robes with a wizard hat.
I enter the area, but then turn around and leave to escape the falling rubble.

[Paphi]

Phil goes deeper, deeper!

[ATHATH]

I am Pun-Pun, and I have a Candle of Invocation, and a viper familiar.

I am Steve the Ghost, and I possess General Ghostly Powers (float through walls, telekinesis, possession, etc.). I don't have any items (except for clothes), because I am a ghost.

Casually float to the next room, because the rocks can't hurt me.

[Elephant Parade]

I am Joe, I have a Magical Imp named Jim.

Tell Jim to save us and our loot.

Joe the Foolish has struck a bargain with [Jim], an imp.

[6]Stumbling over words while he stumbles over stones, Joe begs his imp to "save him from his loot". The imp agrees; the corpses are whisked away to his private dimension. As an added bonus, he pushes you through the doorway.

I am Blind Nigel, wandering Banjoist and Banjo-possessor. I have travelled many lands, playing and learning with the finest musicians and voyage to perfect my art.

Play a song that describes our tragic predicament in such a way as to boost my comrades’ morale and effectiveness. Base it on a traditional acoustic country style.

Blind Nigel has a [Banjo].

[1]You play an experimental death metal cover of a classic banjo tune. It doesn't go over very well; the next 3 players suffer a -1 penalty to all actions as a result of hurt ears.

Jeff screams and makes a run for the doorway to the North.

[1+1-1] Jeff trips over a rock. Again. He doesn't seem to be very dexterous, or lucky.

I am an Elven Ranger Sylvarris, and I have Super Aiming Skills. I have a Cheap Bow of Long-Range Stabby and 5 flint arrows. I also have Standard Cotton Clothing.

I shoot an arrow at the closest goblin.

EDIT: NO I RUN THE HELL AWAY

Sylvarris the Elf is a [Ranger], arguably one of the classes least-suited to a dungeon.

[3-1] Sylvarris doesn't quite make it to the doorway.

I am Aralak Darkstone , the Necromancer. I have Access to healing and Reviving magicks.I also have a damaged oakwood staff, and some snazzy gray cotton robes with a wizard hat.
I enter the area, but then turn around and leave to escape the falling rubble.

Aralak Darkstone is a [Necromancer], though only a novice one; his only spells are [Heal Wound] and [Animate Bones].

[1-1] Aralak falls down the stairs and breaks his neck.

Phil goes deeper, deeper!

[5] Phil quickly pushes into the next room, busting open the door as he goes!

He doesn't see any goblins. The room is fairly sparse, with the exception of a towering statue in the centre. The figure depicted seems to be a priest, but you can tell that he isn't any ordinary man of the cloth...

My name is Kies, and I wield the Legendary Energy Reverse Khopesh, as a Magnificent Being who once lived in the Mountains of The Gods (also known as dragons).

I make my way swiftly toward the door to the North, grabbing what loot cool stuff I can.

Kies the Shady possesses tendencies associated with kleptomaniacs, pathological liars, and dragons, as well as the [Legendary Reverse Energy Kopesh].

[5] Kies grabs a few scattered gold pieces (the imp was feeling lazy) as he sprints to the door.

I am Pun-Pun, and I have a Candle of Invocation, and a viper familiar.

I am Steve the Ghost, and I possess General Ghostly Powers (float through walls, telekinesis, possession, etc.). I don't have any items (except for clothes), because I am a ghost.

Casually float to the next room, because the rocks can't hurt me.

Steve the Ghost possesses an [Incorporeal Body]; he also possesses the power to [Possess] people's possessions.

[4] Pft, look at all those living people scrambling. Some people beings don't need to scramble, and Steve is one of them.

Steve casually notes the doors to the east and west, as well as the statue.


A rumble is heard as the ceiling collapses upon the guardpost; those still inside—Nigel, Jeff, and Sylvarris—are buried under rock. Aralak is also buried under rock, but nobody cares because he was already dead.


Those who made it to the next room see the divine statue glow with a golden light. It seems to be preparing for something...

Spoiler: Heroes (click to show/hide)

Coolrune206 / Jeff the Blessed: [Dead] / [Super Luck]
Paphi / Phil the Angry: Fine / [Orthnalof], Driftwood Shield
blazing glory / Joe the Foolish: Fine / [Jim]
lawastooshort / Blind Nigel: [Dead]
LordBrassroast / Sylvarris the Elf: [Dead] / Lv. 1 Ranger
Dustan Hache / Aralak Darkstone [Dead] / Lv. 1 Necromancer / [Heal Wound][Animate Bones]
The Moonlit Shadow / Kies the Shady: Fine / [Legendary Reverse Energy Kopesh]
ATHATH / Steve the Ghost: Fine / [Incorporeal Body] / [Possess]

The fallen can respawn at a [Statue of Life] of their choice. Conveniently, one was found this turn!

[Coolrune206]

Jeff respawned with minor PTSD, forever scared of falling objects.

[Dustan Hache]

Respawn, cursing my luck. seriously, how did I roll a zero, of all things?

[blazing glory]

Ask Jim to give me my loot now.