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Author Topic: v42 Funny Quotes  (Read 21506 times)

FoiledFencer

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #30 on: December 08, 2015, 03:51:20 am »


The way I read that, it's about the time he denied an apprenticeship to someone. Can you imagine what reading that would be like for the poor sap? :D

Oh, man - I totally misread that. You're right. That's pretty catty. I hope the rejected apprentice shows up as an independent scholar and gets an eyeful.
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"Lithrushâst Kúdlizat: Fetidfur, the slick notch, a grizzly bear leather loincloth. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is studded with zinc, decorated with grizzly bear leather and encircled with bands of grizzly bear leather. This object menaces with spikes of grizzly bear leather."

selrahc007

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #31 on: December 08, 2015, 08:47:24 pm »

My personal favourite was called The Elf: My Only Mistake, about the author's start as a poet
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I just have a fetish for making armor out of cats. I spend an inordinate amount of time trying to get my bone crafter to decorate my cat leather armor with cat bone.
I'll take "Things you hear on the Bay 12 forums" for $1200, Alex.

WordsandChaos

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #32 on: December 09, 2015, 03:23:02 pm »

Mastering Breathing

"Guided meditation worked for cancer, it could work for this."

Animal Courtship After The End

Someone put a guard at the door of the refuse stockpile...

The Examination and the Coming Troubles

Either the author is familiar with Dwarven medical procedure, or they haven't revised.

Start Your Day with Valves

I mean, steam tends to open automatically, so..

The Farm Uncovered
Choose The Farm
An Offering To The Farm

Sounds like a trilogy of Stephen King novels...

edenrh

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #33 on: December 10, 2015, 03:52:41 am »

The third essay I had in my fort was "Misconceptions about the dwarf", about the author's migrating to Bustrack.

I'm considering suggesting it as the new name for the Bay 12 Forums.
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AceSV

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #34 on: December 10, 2015, 04:15:18 am »

Location names can also be pretty great.  Would you like to grab a drink at the Outrageous Butter?  Or join the bards at The Lemon of Ferrying?  Perhaps you'll indulge in some books at the Inky Mansions or ponder with the scholars of the Blockaded House. 
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Quote
could God in fact send a kea to steal Excalibur and thereby usurp the throne of the Britons? 
Furry Fortress 3 The third saga unfurls.  Now with Ninja Frogs and Dogfish Pirates.

LlamaLlord

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #35 on: February 10, 2016, 12:41:56 pm »

I found all these in Legends mode for one world:
Give Me Animal Diseases
Give Me The Diseases of Animals
both written by elves, unsurprisingly.

STDs
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khearn

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #36 on: February 10, 2016, 03:04:18 pm »

I had a novel titled "And She Said: Vomits!"

Only in Dwarf Fortress!
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Have them killed. Nothing solves a problem quite as effectively as simply having it killed.

Chief10

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #37 on: February 11, 2016, 06:27:30 pm »

-snip-
Do You Know the Sharkopaths?
-snip-

Is DF capable of creating new words, or combining words for punny effect? If so, I am very impressed!

Animal Courtship After The End

Someone put a guard at the door of the refuse stockpile...


Almost did a spit-take at this one
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TheBiggerFish

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #38 on: February 11, 2016, 06:32:50 pm »

PTW.
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Sigtext

It has been determined that Trump is an average unladen swallow travelling northbound at his maximum sustainable speed of -3 Obama-cubits per second in the middle of a class 3 hurricane.

Bumber

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #39 on: February 12, 2016, 01:16:17 am »

-snip-
Do You Know the Sharkopaths?
-snip-
Is DF capable of creating new words, or combining words for punny effect? If so, I am very impressed!
I suspect modded creature.
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

AgentNos

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #40 on: February 12, 2016, 06:30:07 am »

My fort's current Tavern is called "The Single Date"...
Welcome, one and all, to The Single Date! A place of drinking, merry making, and one night stands!!!
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Porpoisepower

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #41 on: February 12, 2016, 08:10:44 am »

My sincerest wish is for one of my marksdwarves to write an essay on the breeding of ants.
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That's what DF needs, The gutbuster brigade.  Screw that elf and his cat. Thibbledorf Pwent is the real hero.

Henry47

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #42 on: February 12, 2016, 08:21:56 am »

Here's a statue i had made.
"This is a exceptional sandstone statue of elves.
The item is a a rendition of the Dark Oil, an image of five elves and a bed. The five elves are screaming. The five elves are striking a triumphant pose. The bed is burning."
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L0rd L33t

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #43 on: February 12, 2016, 08:41:39 pm »

"Question animal diets"

I can assume it's referring to elephants.
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Tantrum Spirals in a Nutshell:
Dwarf 1 is throwing a tantrum!
Dwarf 2: A fight? Count me in!
Dwarf 2: EVERYONE! GET IN HERE!
Dwarf 3: EVERYONE! GET IN HERE!
Dwarf 4: EVERYONE! GET IN HERE!

vexxice

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Re: v42 Funny Quotes
« Reply #44 on: February 13, 2016, 01:29:13 am »

The "Thun"

"The Thun is a small hand-held percussion instrument. It consists of a bowl. The musician shakes the bowl. The instrument has a single high pitch. The instrument has a noisy floating timber."


Soooooo.... my dwarves are basically waving empty bowls around, and they are so drunk they think it makes noise.
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