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[TempAcc]

Dating sims, like most visual novels, are just scene selectors with some contrivances between scenes to simulate interaction, with the goal being a certain chain of events you unlock through some choices (which is a rather shitty goal if you get it just by making the right choices, since there's no real challenge involved), which doesn't exactly mean all visual novels suck. Visual novels can be entertaining if they mix things up with actual puzzles and have a plot that is half decent, that is, when they involve something other than just ~select X choice to get Y result~.

Too bad dating sims usualy have hilariously bad plots and characters with cardboard personalities or that could really need some counseling :v. Seriously though, you'd be hard pressed to find any dating sim that doesn't include the usual character stereotypes. Ex: cutesy, sugary person; tomboyish go-lucky person; big sister/brother person; shy, maybe nerdy or clumsy person; airhead person; dark and mysterious edgy person; crazy tsundere person; psycho boyfriend/girlfriend person; I would fuck a rock if I could person; etc.

If you want a dating sim with gameplay, though, you could always play mass effect or dragon age

[Neonivek]

Ohh yeah because those games were dang freeken perfect

"I don't know why, but after you showered me with gifts I suddenly want to have sex with you and intensely... Make awkward virgin love to me!"

[TempAcc]

I didn't say they were good dating sims, just that they have actual gameplay

[KaelGotDwarves]

I had some friends tell me that one Pigeon dating sim is actually pretty good because it doesn't take itself seriously. Spoilers: Don't read too much information about it because that ruins the game.

[Neonivek]

I had some friends tell me that one Pigeon dating sim is actually pretty good because it doesn't take itself seriously. Spoilers: Don't read too much information about it because that ruins the game.

I find that it is better to watch then play. a LOT of its jokes are also really subtle or made at the expense of gameplay.

Such as the insane time scale and how it jumps around a lot.

[Trapezohedron]

I had some friends tell me that one Pigeon dating sim is actually pretty good because it doesn't take itself seriously. Spoilers: Don't read too much information about it because that ruins the game.

More surprising is the fact that Kael is back.

[werty892]

Have you considered real life dating? Seems like it would fit what you have.

[Nighthawk]

Have you considered real life dating? Seems like it would fit what you have.

Sorry, you were beaten to the punch for that joke (in the first reply, no less):

I don't have a real answer, but I hear there's this one called real life that's pretty realistic.

Also, you guys who keep advocating real life just don't seem to understand...

Spoiler: Image (click to show/hide)

In all seriousness, though, there's a reason this thread exists in a forum about videogames, and that reason is not so people can suggest "try real life lol."

[TempAcc]

Well, this is the first topic on dating sims I've seen on these forums. Most of the time people want to play a game that involves shooting/slashing/casting magic/commanding troops, so we can't just say "try real life lol" in these cases :v

Really though, what we mean is that there aren't really any dating sims (that aren't deconstructions or parodies of it, like the pidgeon one) that are worth playing, so if you actualy want to experience a dating-like thing, you should prob try, you know, actual dating, because thats actualy a feasible thing to do IRL :v!

[KaelGotDwarves]

More surprising is the fact that Kael is back.

I stop by on occasion

But yeah, dating sims suffer from the whole "give people what they want" escapism of video games, and there aren't really that many complex and realistic options, so you could say.

[Niveras]

I doubt what you're looking for exists, because dating sims aren't so much dating sims as extended foreplay seduction simulators, not dating sims. I mean, okay, some people think of dating as a game in which you're supposed to bag as much ass as you can, as frequently as you can, and in that respect they're dating sims true enough, even if things are still simplified in the extreme in the name of realistic development times and gameplay.

In the real world, most people wouldn't consider an individual who is projecting a false identity, giving all the answers the target wants to hear, in order to sleep with someone as "dating." Hell, you know this yourself since this is the portion you're finding unrealistic. In reality, people are looking for someone compatible, and dating is how they test that (the extent of that testing and what constitutes "compatible", of course, varying with every individual and pairing). The courtship is for broader purposes than sex.

You're certainly not going to find a more realistic portrayal in any kind of game that bills itself directly as a dating sim. That's just not what "dating sim" means. You might be able to find something resembling realistic "dating" (or at least courtship for purposes other than simply sex) in a game that isn't focused exclusively on that, such as what WRPGs try to do with romancing companions. (I fully recognize that, of course, no RPG I can think of presently does so successfully, modern or otherwise).

[Neonivek]

so your saying these are just a predator simulator where you are just trying to seduce people...

[Trapezohedron]

so your saying these are just a predator simulator where you are just trying to seduce people...

Sold.

A Yandere dating sim with an Alien and a Predator vying for the affections of Ripley...?

Sounds fun.

[Rolan7]

Make it Ridley and I'm sold.

[Gabeux]

Most dating sims I've seen seem to be made by people who never dated, or who did and didn't enjoy it so they fantasize over it - either on the sexual or the romantic side of things.

Then again, I probably played only 2 of them in my life and dropped them because I really can't stand the constant dialog, pauses, fades, out-of-place unnecessary stuff, and all that. I've mostly seen them on Youtube.
But what I like about real dating is the unexpected, surprises, and dynamic interaction. You're getting to know someone new, 50% of the time it feels awkward (which is always fun), and it can naturally feel really bad or really good for one or both parties.

As you said in the OP, dating sims suck because they are not "Sims" - most are just a weird multiple-choice exam in which, if you can guess the underlying direction, becomes easy to pass.
There's some game I saw which has some match-3 type mini-games. I remember that you had to be a good guy to some girls, a bad guy to some.. it was like choosing different approaches to different girls that liked different things. Maybe mix things up. At least on high school, that's pretty much how everyone would go about it, in real life.
I'm not sure how good or how successful the game is in not-sucking, because the dialog's still awkward, and with an american dub that makes me cringe (I don't know japanese, I'm not hardcore anime fan, but certain dubs can make things even worse).
But I remember thinking that was way better than the default "pretend you're a criminal"/"pretend you're a prince" kind of thing.

Still, I don't get it why those games are called "Dating Sims". With a fishing, flying or farming simulator, I can feel different degrees of the actual thing.
In Dating Sims, I don't think it will ever be any close to real dating. Not until we have sentient AI playing Human Simulator on one of their CPU cores.
Then again, that's not the point of dating sims, I guess - which, again, makes me don't get it why they are called dating sims.

Not sure if I added anything to the topic, because dating really is one of the games that I like to play in real life. Better graphics, better AI. 

EDIT: The game I mentioned is HuniePop, but I now noticed I only watched Pewdiepie playing 2 minutes of it, so take what I said about it with a grain of salt.
I noticed it has explicit stuff in it too, so I don't know if it applies.