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Author Topic: Knock knock!  (Read 31966 times)

McDonald

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #30 on: October 01, 2015, 02:55:13 pm »

"Are you hungry? Or thirsty? We need to do something about your clothes..."

Discreetly peek out the front window.
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origamiscienceguy

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #31 on: October 01, 2015, 02:56:41 pm »

allow the kid to take a shower and prepare some ramen noodle soup. While you're waiting, sweep the front porch to get rid of tracks.
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"'...It represents the world. They [the dwarves] plan to destroy it.' 'WITH SOAP?!'" -legend of zoro (with some strange interperetation)

Tawa

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #32 on: October 01, 2015, 03:03:02 pm »

Answer in the most stereotypical German accent imaginable.

"VAT do you vant?!"

The chid seems to be slightly suprised by your accent.
"I need help?" The child says, while quickly scanning the road behind.
"COME eenside. You tell me vat eez happening. I vill protekt you."
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Nunzillor

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #33 on: October 01, 2015, 03:25:14 pm »

"Hey, no solicitors!"

Proceed to stay awake for as long as possible in my fortified compound, only sleeping when my elite and extremely loyal team of 40 bodyguards take their positions.
« Last Edit: October 01, 2015, 04:02:02 pm by Nunzillor »
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AoshimaMichio

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #34 on: October 01, 2015, 03:30:50 pm »

"Are you hungry? Or thirsty? We need to do something about your clothes..."

Discreetly peek out the front window.

"Food would be great." The kid answers smiling a bit. "Is there something wrong about my clothes? Sure, they are little dirty but I like them."

On outside you see small group of less than reputable folks. Their kind are very unusual in this neighbourhood. And mongrel sniffing gound ahead of them.


allow the kid to take a shower and prepare some ramen noodle soup. While you're waiting, sweep the front porch to get rid of tracks.

Food was eaten quickly and the kid accepts the shower. You do some sweeping outside when police comes.

"Hey you! Have you seen a young beggar around? Small and very filthy girl? She's wanted for thievery."


Answer in the most stereotypical German accent imaginable.

"VAT do you vant?!"

The chid seems to be slightly suprised by your accent.
"I need help?" The child says, while quickly scanning the road behind.
"COME eenside. You tell me vat eez happening. I vill protekt you."

The child hesitates briefly, but gets inside anyway.

"I'm being chased by bad guys! It's bad if they find me."


"Hey, no solicitors!"

Proceed to stay awake for as long as possible in my fortified comound, only sleeping when my elite and extremely loyal team of 40 bodyguards take their positions.

The kid runs away.

Later on that night you find out that someone is not as loyal as you thought. Your throat swells shut soon after your late night coffee and you suffocate.
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birdy51

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #35 on: October 01, 2015, 03:32:52 pm »

"Das ist nicht gutt!" Exclaims the ambiguous German stereotype. Grap ze elyphont rifle froom ze vall und geev eet to ze kinder joost een case.
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Also started a Let's Play, Yu-Gi-Oh! Duelists of the Roses

McDonald

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #36 on: October 01, 2015, 03:43:48 pm »

"Food will have to wait, there's a bunch of dodgy people outside. You need to hide."

Quietly lock the door, and take the kid the fallout shelter under the house. On the way there, grab the shotgun from it's case.
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origamiscienceguy

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #37 on: October 01, 2015, 03:45:54 pm »

Activate the laser trap over your front door before going to the bunker.
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"'...It represents the world. They [the dwarves] plan to destroy it.' 'WITH SOAP?!'" -legend of zoro (with some strange interperetation)

McDonald

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #38 on: October 01, 2015, 03:48:23 pm »

And quickly draw a booby trapped sacrificial pentragram in front of the window.
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Nunzillor

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #39 on: October 01, 2015, 04:04:54 pm »

"I'm sorry, but my work is at a very delicate stage.  I must ask you to leave."

Upload my consciousness into a data container that will propagate itself deathlessly through the internet until the end of time.
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AoshimaMichio

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #40 on: October 01, 2015, 11:59:47 pm »

"Das ist nicht gutt!" Exclaims the ambiguous German stereotype. Grap ze elyphont rifle froom ze vall und geev eet to ze kinder joost een case.

You grab the rifle. Indeed, in these times one can be never too sure who's behind one's door so being prepared for worst is only natural.

Knock knock. Gonna open the door or what?


"Food will have to wait, there's a bunch of dodgy people outside. You need to hide."

Quietly lock the door, and take the kid the fallout shelter under the house. On the way there, grab the shotgun from it's case.

The kid tries to sneak behind a couch, but you grab him/her by neck and drag him/her down to the shelter. And the shotgun.

And quickly draw a booby trapped sacrificial pentragram in front of the window.

You are not sure if magic learned from D&D sessions will actually help in reality, but maybe thugs will believe it works. It only takes few seconds after all. Done. Now down into safety.

Activate the laser trap over your front door before going to the bunker.

You completely ignore the police chatting with you and run inside to activate your traps. The police run after you but you barely manage to get inside first. Locking the door is completely another matter. You end up in a tug-o-war with the police over the door, and you are not doing too well.

"She's here!" The police yells. Which makes you believe there's more than one police.


"I'm sorry, but my work is at a very delicate stage.  I must ask you to leave."

Upload my consciousness into a data container that will propagate itself deathlessly through the internet until the end of time.

During the upload process there's an unfortunate power outage. Even when you have so many buffers and backup genertors to keep electricity flowing, the brief disturbance is enough to corrupt your half-finished digital copy useless and shock you into vegetable state.
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origamiscienceguy

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #41 on: October 02, 2015, 12:05:27 am »

Wait, sorry, I was thinking I was in an alternate dimension where thugs were knocking at my door. I was just going to activate my laser defense system wen you brought me back to reality. Would you like to see my laser defense system? Show them my laser defense system.
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"'...It represents the world. They [the dwarves] plan to destroy it.' 'WITH SOAP?!'" -legend of zoro (with some strange interperetation)

Nunzillor

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #42 on: October 02, 2015, 12:06:21 am »

"Yes, yes.  Come in!  Someone must witness the splendor!  Someone must feel the wonder!  It shall be you.  Yes!"

Activate the MK2 prismatic forcefields surrounding the property.  Are they fully functional?
« Last Edit: October 02, 2015, 12:17:18 am by Nunzillor »
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AoshimaMichio

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #43 on: October 02, 2015, 03:44:36 am »

Wait, sorry, I was thinking I was in an alternate dimension where thugs were knocking at my door. I was just going to activate my laser defense system wen you brought me back to reality. Would you like to see my laser defense system? Show them my laser defense system.

I'm afraid couple of laser pointers doesn't make effective defense system. And thugs are not on your street. They are on McDonald's street.


"Yes, yes.  Come in!  Someone must witness the splendor!  Someone must feel the wonder!  It shall be you.  Yes!"

Activate the MK2 prismatic forcefields surrounding the property.  Are they fully functional?

The forcefields are functional in fantasy and in your mind. It doesn't stop a dirty kid opening your front door. S/He doesn't step in though. Your eccentric behaviour is scaring him/her a bit.
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Old sigs.
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McDonald

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Re: Knock knock!
« Reply #44 on: October 02, 2015, 03:47:55 am »

"We should be safe, hopefully. What's your name?"

Prepare ramen noodles for me and the kid.
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