Arright, time to be kickin’ some vile mist husk arse! I mean, not me personally, but the militia certainly. They seem keen.
'e's never been a pretty dwarf, but Zuglarkun certainly used to be better lookin' than this. Mate, ye need to be takin' better care o' yerself.
“Uh, overseer?”
Yar, what be the problem lad?
“Um... we worked out that the dwarf that got burned was Ablel Ozkaklitast, and...”
Ah, Ablel, I hardly knew ye. In fact, I don’t think I knew ye at all. Oh well, these things happen.”
“... err... and there’s a forgotten beast in the third caverns.”
“The caverns what be open? Those caverns?”
“Yes, overseer.”
“Aw crup! EVERYONE, CHANGE ‘O PLANS! TA’ THE THIRD CAVERNS!”
Hyahar! No beastie be gettin' into Murderflood on my wa-
Aw c'mon! Dammit, the militia be miles away, holding off the fireslug. Us civilians will have to handle this one.
Luckily, it's made of steam: a few good punches should drive the beastie off. We should be fine so long as it doesn't catch anyone napping...
... yar, saw that one coming the moment I said it. Oh god, that be Flame I, our weaponsmith! Wake up, Flame! Yer about to be sauna'd to death!!!
... she can't hear me, can she?
Oh. Uh... huh. It be just standing there, watchin' her while she sleeps. That be creepy but also kind of romantic, in a "sparkly vampire" kind of way.
What? I be an author, it be countin' as research. Don't judge me.
Is it waiting for her to wake up? What will happen when she...
Flame: "Oh. Uh... hi? You know what, I'm just... I'm going on break. Bye."
Flame: "Eww! Don't touch me, you're wet!"
Flame: "I'm leaving. Go away!"
Yar, that be the appropriate response. Those books would've been much better if the protagonist 'd done
that when she woke up. She could learn a thing or two from Flame.
Taupe? Imic? Is the beast in position? Yar? Excellent.
KILL. 
Giant War Kea's to the rescue!
Giant War Kea's are fucking useless!
And where be those grizzly bears I assigned to protect our most valuable dwarves? And will someone just punch the thing in the face until it's dead? Please?
Thank ye. Now, back to the fireslug situation.
------
Ye idiots ready? Ye better be, 'cos here it comes!
OPEN FIRE!
"Whoa. Did we get it? Wait, what's it doing..."
"It's gonna explode!"
BOOM
Most of the militia be thrown to safety by the explosion, but three dwarves were engulfed in the fireball: Thob the hammerdwarf, Thob the marskdwarf, and Obok, Thobs newborn baby. The only baby born this year, in fact: poor Obok had been born barely a month ago. I remember Thob telling me she'd been planning to name the young dwarf "Shipcat", or possibly "Zuglarkun V".
Well, I can at least say his mother faced her demise, as well as that of her child, with quite a bit of style.
I hope we can all be so composed and dignified as we burn to death slowly. An inspiration, to be sure.
Alright you lot, get back to the surface. Hurry yer slack arses. We be havin' a Zuglarkun to kill and a trio of the weak-willed to rescue...
------
Yar! Battle be joined! The militia's tactics be flawless: they commence the attack by knocking the copper crossbow from Zuglarkun's hand, and then disarming
him in an even more literal fashion.
With no arms left to attack with, it be just a matter of not getting bitten and hitting him until he stops moving. Some soldiers be a little overenthusiastic...
... but mostly the militia be actin' like professionals. The battle finally ends when one soldier tackles the husk to the ground. For a moment Zuglarkun's face twists into a look of surprise: perhaps it be a remnant of his original personality, or perhaps the intelligence that controls his corpse be genuinely surprised. Regardless, the swordsdwarf ignores it, raises her sword high, and cuts his head off at the base of the neck.
Propelled by the force of the blow, the ex-dwarf's head sails out into the middle of the lake with neck still attached, disturbing the still water with a splash.
All hail Asmoth, slayer of Zuglarkun!
After a moment, the three dwarves on the far bank came to their senses and began the trek home, while the militia piled back through the new tunnel.
Yar! An excellent result, what be leavin' absolutely no loose ends whatsoever.
Silently, the dwarven head settled into the darkness at the bottom of the lake. The weeds curled around it, embracing and caressing it. Not. A. One.
Ye can all be gettin' back to work now.
------
OOC:Zuglarkun: Since our youngest dwarf got incinerated, I've dwarfed Shipcat as the second youngest.
Flame: Yeah, I'm still working out how to use the trap corridor efficiently. I don't want to get anyone killed, but I don't have a chance in hell of getting my megaproject finished if I don't keep the militia working. A quandry, ye see.
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Topic: 'Murderflood: (Ardentdikes IIIv3) You, there, grab this save! (Read 228912 times)