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Author Topic: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants  (Read 3787 times)

Sensei

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Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« on: August 17, 2015, 05:51:12 pm »

Year is 1931. Alternate timeline. Arstotzka is attacked by frost giants which have lain sleeping under the permafrost until now. They smell Arstotzka's massive salt supply, and they hunger.

I will be putting as little effort as possible into this and stop updating it when it ceases to entertain me or I have something better to do.

Your weapons are this:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

You have just received word that the frost giants have been seen climbing out of the snow and ice, they are real (at least that is what High Command says, you have not seen one yet). Moksburg cowards nowhere to be seen. You can mostly design weapons and maybe do other stuff.
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Taricus

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2015, 05:52:42 pm »

Ahahahahaha. I'm going to watch this, this will be glorious!
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Elfeater

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #2 on: August 17, 2015, 06:02:09 pm »

Are both sides allowed to be in this thread? Or just Arstotzka?
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Kot

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #3 on: August 17, 2015, 06:03:19 pm »

Make flamethrowers.
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Andres

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #4 on: August 17, 2015, 06:09:10 pm »

Design the AS-AMR31.
Spoiler: AS-AMR31 (click to show/hide)

Glory to Arstotzka.
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LordSlowpoke

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #5 on: August 17, 2015, 06:10:47 pm »

posting to watch
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Kot

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #6 on: August 17, 2015, 06:14:54 pm »

Spoiler: AS-AMR31 (click to show/hide)
FYFY
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Elephant Parade

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #7 on: August 17, 2015, 06:19:11 pm »

Posting to watch. If Moksburgians are allowed to suggest things,

Order: Have all soldiers wear warm clothing. Import more, if necessary.
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Kot

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #8 on: August 17, 2015, 06:20:58 pm »

Order: Have all soldiers wear warm clothing. Import more, if necessary.
We're Arstotzkans... this order makes no sense.
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Kot finishes his morning routine in the same way he always does, by burning a scale replica of Saint Basil's Cathedral on the windowsill.

Sensei

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #9 on: August 17, 2015, 06:24:48 pm »

Are both sides allowed to be in this thread? Or just Arstotzka?
In this thread everyone is Arstotzka. You are Arstotzka. Taricus is Arstotzka. Your dog is Arstotzka. Even tigers is Arstotzka. Frost giants are not Arstotzka.

Design the AS-AMR31.
Spoiler: AS-AMR31 (click to show/hide)

Glory to Arstotzka.

Spoiler: AS-AMR31 (click to show/hide)
FYFY

1931 happens. You make the AS-AMR31 with API rounds. This year the Frost Giants make their first attack. They wield giant swords, axes and bows with glowing magic runes in an ancient and forgotten language, which hew through soldiers and tanks alike. Normal rifles are useless, the new AMR31 can sometimes scare a frost giant off with massed fire. Air bombing and artillery sometimes kill a frost giant.

The Frost Giants feed on Dorsal-Turret based rage for strength. They are still only gathering their numbers in the wilderness.

Posting to watch. If Moksburgians are allowed to suggest things,

Order: Have all soldiers wear warm clothing. Import more, if necessary.
All Arstotzkan grandmothers are ordered to knit mittens and earmuffs and hot cocoa mug cozies.
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andrea

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #10 on: August 17, 2015, 06:28:49 pm »

they want salt? they can have salt! use salt munitions to melt them.
use our turreted guns to shoot them! What? what do you mean they are on the wrong side? raaaaage!

( this thread is golden. diamond encrusted even)

Kot

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #11 on: August 17, 2015, 06:29:17 pm »

Use the Medal Of Glory to melt Ice Giants.
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Taricus

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #12 on: August 17, 2015, 06:30:38 pm »

Make glorious 155mm Howitzer to bomb frost giants, with incendiary munitions to make them watery.
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adwarf

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #13 on: August 17, 2015, 06:36:02 pm »

Build glorious 60mm squad portable anti-giant machinegun. It shall use explosive and incendiary ammo.
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Sensei

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Re: Arstotzka Versus the Ice Giants
« Reply #14 on: August 17, 2015, 06:40:04 pm »

Quote
In this thread everyone is Arstotzka. You are Arstotzka. Taricus is Arstotzka. Your dog is Arstotzka. Even tigers is Arstotzka. Frost giants are not Arstotzka.
I changed my mind. Sometimes you can be frost giants. I'm not keeping track who, play both sides for all I care. Frost giants have gathered enough rage energy to make a new magic spell/violation of physics, decide what.

they want salt? they can have salt! use salt munitions to melt them.
Noooooo what have you done! This only gives them more power.

Use the Medal Of Glory to melt Ice Giants.
Glorious Arstotzkan Heroes ward frost giants with Medal of Glory. It only works when given to soldiers who earned it though.

Make glorious 155mm Howitzer to bomb frost giants, with incendiary munitions to make them watery.
BOOM. BOOM.

Build glorious 60mm squad portable anti-giant machinegun. It shall use explosive and incendiary ammo.
Engineers completely fail, point barrel the wrong way, kill soldiers. Try again.

Year is later in 1931 probably. Frost giants have gathered an army, they are on the southwest part of Forenia. It looks like they are going to start marching towards the mountain salt mines. Arstotzka's massive guns and glory soldiers stall their advance a little. Frost giants are actually still full of blood, you can tell when you hit one with a 155m howitzer.
« Last Edit: August 17, 2015, 06:43:59 pm by Sensei »
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