OW, you're in Oceania, right? I'll try and compensate for that in the future, sorry.
And the winner is:
*drumroll*
Inserting a mason jar into my anus!
You'll find your new cards in your hands. The next black card is:
Why can't I sleep at night?- Being on fire
- Racism
- Old-people smell
- A micropenis
- Barack Obama
- My humps
- The Tempur-Pedic® Swedish Sleep System™
- Scientology
- Repression
- Prancing
- Women in yoghurt commercials
- Classist undertones
- Not giving a shit about the third world
- Inserting a mason jar into my anus
- Dry heaving
- Skeletor
- Darth Vader
- Figgy pudding
- My relationship status
- Overcompensation
- Dick Cheney
- Court-ordered rehab
- A windmill full of corpses
- The gays
- An oversized lollipop
- Advice from a wise, old black man
- Five-Dollar Footlongs™
- Elderly Japanese men
- Free samples
- Peeing a little bit
- Pooping back and forth. Forever.
- MechaHitler
- African children
- An asymmetric boob job
- Binging and purgeing
- The hardworking Mexican
- Estrogen
- Sexual tension
- Famine
- A stray pube
- A ball of earwax, semen, and toenail clippings.
- Testicular torsion
- Being fabulous
- An Oedipus complex
- A tiny horse
- Boogers
- Penis envy
- Men
- Heartwarming orphans
- Chunks of dead hitchhiker
- A bag of magic beans
- The Devil himself
- The World of Warcraft
- Pictures of boobs
How did I lose my virginity? Inserting a mason jar into my anus. - MonkeyHead
EDIT: We can do that, too - but then we'll have to remember who 'played' the black card, since right now I'm essentially just dropping them in from outside. Let's try one more round with the voting - I don't know how much of an issue people voting for themselves really is - and if that doesn't work out, we'll switch.