Prologue1st Granite 243"Damn it, I'm gonna be late for combat training! Curse this blasted rain!""What is with this constant downpour? I'll have to oil down my armor and rub off the rust again."I cursed under my breath as I trudged my way across the soggy fields of dog tooth grass and lush grama, holding up my candlenut shield in a futile effort to ward off the rain.
I'd arrived in Ímarust
(Ahhh! Stop reminding me with the rust!) around 4 years ago to ply my craft as a woodcutter and fisherdwarf. I remembered that it was raining heavily then, as it is now.
Damn rain never lets up in this place. Of course, they took one good look at me and put me in the military instead where I can't even wield an my axe or touch a fishing pole. Of course by now I'm pretty much resigned to my lot in life, at least the lack of fishing activity will keep me away from those-
Did I mention I absolutely detest those icky slimy things? Did you know they
squirt?? As a fisherdwarf I had to be careful of how I picked my fishing spots at low tide in order to avoid entire clusters of those wretched things as they squirted their bodily fluids over the bloody place. All the doctors at home said I had some sort of
ostraconophobia or was it
phallophobia? But I simply don't quite trust the judgement of any fellow that detests
hamsters.
Still, things aren't too bad around here, if you overlook the constant rain, the periodic lack of booze, the wereskunks, the gem monsters, the goblin sieges and the smell of manure everywhere.
"You're late." Said Taupe as he demonstrated the
Zimeshabod, dodging an oncoming blow from Olin and tapping his shoulder while Thob and Sodel looked on and tried to replicate the movement.
"I'm sorry! It was the damn rain I-""-No matter, you are excused from this morning's training, the Duke is expecting you in his office.""What could he want from me?""I don't know but you better- Too slow! Anticipate the blow, then dodge and attack in the same movement!" Barked Taupe as he demonstrated the move once again with no wasted motion.
Taupe turned towards me.
"You'd better hurry." he said matter of factly, before returning to a relaxed position and dodging another blow from Olin.
As I made my way across the pens and pastures towards the living quarters and dining area, I came across a most depressing sight.
Apparently, Shul-Nak was playing with his niece, ToniK with his wife Cilob following in tow, when he keeled over in front of the dining quarters and passed away at the ripe old age of a hundred and fifty five. Tonik who had been under quite a lot of stress lately simply couldn't retain her composure and burst into a fit of tears, while Cilob whom is rather old herself tries to face the death of her husband with some dignity, trying to-
Edem, busybody that she is, tries to lecture ToniK, whom is getting on in age herself, about the need for composure and trying not to make a scene and interrupting everyone else.
This was way too late of course, everyone in the vicinity is still in shock from Shul-nak's sudden demise. I left them to their own devices and made my way down the stairway to the Duke's quarters below.
The Duke wasn't in at the moment, so naturally I went next door to the Mayor Quasar's office to see if she knew what was going on.
The Mayor has her hands full at the moment trying to placate a depressed Bearskie and a oblivious As who is clearly off her rocker, stumbling about all over the place and knocking over furniture.
"Yeah I know I have trouble controlling my temper. But there's nothing like a good brawl you know?" Muttered Bearskie indignantly.
The moody Bearskie stood in stark contrast to Mayor Quasar, whom seemed oddly pleased with herself.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE! AHHHHHH!! ITS ALL GETTING ME DOWN!! AHHHHHHHHH!! WHY DOESN'T ANYONE DO ANYTHING?" Yelled Bearskie into Mayor Quasar's ear.
The Mayor though, nary flinched and instead smiled with an aura of inner peace.
"There there, don't you feel better now Bearskie for getting that off your chest?""Why... I suppose I do Mayor! Thanks!" Spoke Bearskie as he suddenly lightened up considerably, then as he turned and walked out of the office, slumped back into his usual stupor.
"Oh how I do like conducting meetings in my own office. What a nice setting don't you agree?" Remarked Mayor Quasar as she beckoned me into her office, taking off the wax wads plugged into her ears.
"I don't suppose you're here to wail and moan about something are you?""Well, I'm actually looking for the Duke, do you know where he is?""Well he sure ain't in his office. I think he went off earlier to perfect his masonry skills.""I- don't suppose... you know why the Duke... summoned for me then?" I stammered.
"Well, as a matter of fact I do... Are you aware of Breadbowl's relationship with the mountainhomes?""Er... Yes I do.""Good, that makes things easier. You see, though the King is pleased with the substantial offerings from last year, he was most distressed at the utter lack of offerings last summer. That meant he had to dig out of his own personal larder to feed the citizens of The Old Nets. I even heard rumors that some folks starved. This will not do at all, nuh uh. So the Duke has selected a new overseer to take care of this little green problem. An overseer with a decidedly military slant. Namely you."*Gulp* "May I ask why me and not someone more qualified for the task at hand, like-""NO. You may NOT. Now take these overseer logbooks and scram."
With that whole business out of the way, I plunked the overseer logs onto a dining table and got myself a drink from my water skin.
"Damn it! Where's the booze!? Hmmm.. on second thought, perhaps I could put these overseer powers to good use." I muttered absentmindedly to myself.
"OVERSEER!?" Exclaimed Stukos the weaponsmith from a nearby table.
Guess that makes us all idiots huh?