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[Ozarck]

Y, new character.

Meik, +1 leck

punch a shark bcos hes ugly

(3) meik punches a bit of severed shark tail. "You ugly" Meick screams.
(4-1) sherk jump outta de waterand headbutt Miyek, but doesn't eat him.

Well, here's my "Don't Die" roll.

Ride the shark to victory! Shout loudly to dominate it!

Silleh, a "don't die roll" is when something attacks you. you posted a "daring action." Gud ting lkuk is passive.
(3) you start swiming in cirkles after the shark swimming in sircles after you! "Blub! BLUB!" you shout!
(5-1)<- dat deh lcuk bonus in action, rite der! Shark catches up and bites off your foot. Playing this has cost you an arm and a leg!

"Hep! Hep! Someone hep Billeh! Billeh is stuck!"

Billeh tries to roll out from unduh the concrete rubblez. If not, then Billeh uses his Billeh telekinesis power teh escape. Bat smack any sharkses.

...
...
...
I couldn't remember billeh's special bonus, so I scrolled back ...
Billeh died in balcony crash! he rolled into a shark frenzy1! film continuity error! We sees Billeh's death scene a second time! it's horrific! new Character Y/N?

You forgot my action.

Prima Donna. "Oh, he got more lines than me. Waaah, why am I not in this scene? boo my hair looks awful today." You wuz off screen last round, so nothing interesting happened to you. But fine, I'll ressurect your scene from teh cutting room floor. Lemme look ...

Crawl away.
Name: Allie
+1 to crazuh stunts.

(1) I did mention sharks on all sides? yu crawl into de water. Uh oh!
(4) Shark pull you under in dramatic "beach girl being pulled under by shark" scene! Oh noes! the suspense! tune in next turn for stunning conclusion of "girl gets dragged under by shark" scene!

Name: Buddy Guyson

has teh mad sckihlz

Runn up teh stares agan!

(4) yu run to top of stairs. Door is lokced. You find a fire hose!
(1) bump, bump, oh well, I gess nobody home, say de shark. it leaves, to haunt you anodder scene!

moev eest veri kwikfast usign a bnech too-bai-fore as shrak-fightar stik wen de shraks attak

Name: Terry Hintz
Got teh lcuk!

Do a hot dance to distract the sharks!

(4) yu step in something burning and hop around on one foot, holding hte uthur with your hands! Lessee wut de sharks think!
(6-1) Trhee sharks attack yu at once! Dey fall victim to "Trhee (shark) Stooges Syndrome and bonk hedds. bizzarely lckucky

Keep reminding the general to call the military, while I shoot away sharks with my service pistol

Silleh, they don't give presidents weapons. They give presidents bodyguards with weapons.
You squawk on the fone a bit (2) but de fone goes dedd. No service!. Air strike in 54 turns. Marine strike in 87 turns. Army strike in 1211 turns. Union strike in 2019 turns. I promise to foreget all about all of these! Better remind me lots.

tiem to roll for sharks eetin you and yur guards.
Guy one: (1) no shrk fur he!
Guy second: (4) guy seccund gets into fisticuffs wit sherk! he going down fightin! next tunr we see if he make it!
Guy prez: (4-1) ooooh. Lessee if fyur bodygurd protec yu (3) He hold it at bay dis turn, but it still commin 4 yu!

[Sl4cker]

"But wait! You gave me a +1 when I back-flipped off the balcony! That was also a daring action! I DEMAND MY LEG BACK!"

Demand my leg back.

[Ozarck]

"But wait! You gave me a +1 when I back-flipped off the balcony! That was also a daring action! I DEMAND MY LEG BACK!"

Demand my leg back.

I rolled for you dying from landing on the bleachers below, getting eaten by a shark, and getting crushed by the balcony collapse. that said, it WAS a daring action. the GM is inconsistent and forgets things occaionally. You reeeeeeaaaaallllly want me to fix that turn for you? It involves a shark roll.

Here, look, the bonus works like thins: Shark attacks, shark gets a minus to attack. (otherwise, you'd be eaten instead of just your foot). Building falls, you dodge - dodge gets a bonus. Building falls, yo ustand still: I roll to see if building falls around you

[Megggas]

Terry Hintz, lcuk

Provide the sharks with helpful hints for hunting humans, in exchange for safe passage out of the city.

[Aslandus]

Name: Buddy Guyson

has teh mad sckihlz

Pull the hignes off the dor and then kik it down

[conein]

taunt the schark

[Tawa]

moev eest veri kwikfast usign a bnech too-bai-fore as shrak-fightar stik wen de shraks attak

...

hhhhmmmmm

somefink seemses aymiss hear

[Aslandus]

moev eest veri kwikfast usign a bnech too-bai-fore as shrak-fightar stik wen de shraks attak

...

hhhhmmmmm

somefink seemses aymiss hear

You want 2 far, he kant understand ur aksent

[Tawa]

Oh, pbbbt sorry, pbbbt I'll pbbbt try pbbbt to pbbbt translate, pbbbt.

move eest very kwikfast, using a too-bai-fore frum a bench as a sharck-fighter stik wen de sharcks attak

[wipeout1024]

Get my way out of the shark.
Name: Allie
+1 to crazuh stunts

[Sl4cker]

"Alfred McReallyReallyLongAndObnoxiousName as his classmates called him when he was younger reluctantly withdraws his complaints."

Punch shark in the eye to establish dominance.

[Ozarck]

moev eest veri kwikfast usign a bnech too-bai-fore as shrak-fightar stik wen de shraks attak

...

hhhhmmmmm

somefink seemses aymiss hear

You want 2 far, he kant understand ur aksent

Askent fayn. Continuity error. Nerds evrywhere will nitpick mahny sseens laik dis one, til der hyeds xplood. Dis moovee not edited with best scihls and attenshun to deetale.

Terry Hintz, lcuk

Provide the sharks with helpful hints for hunting humans, in exchange for safe passage out of the city.

(4) Hay shark! Hoomans live on de laand! Dey not berry fast eidur! Swim harder!
(5-1) One ofthe Stooge Sharks bites off yer arm!
(4-1) anudder bites off three toes!
(6-1) Third eets yu and bites big chunk out of first Stooge sherk1. Stooges become Laurel and Hardy naow. New Character Y/N?

Name: Buddy Guyson

has teh mad sckihlz

Pull the hignes off the dor and then kik it down

(5) hinges on odder side, but you kick door down anyway, looking all badass and yelling a lot. Yu on promenade at concessions now.
(4)de croud tinks yu opened a excape dore for dem, runs yu over in hurry, pushing yu into starewell again! Derp! Now in starewell with crowd of dummies.

taunt the schark

(6) yu lie on de floor and make like a seal. Shrak get very angry.
(5) it eet yu, stays very angry - dis not seel!

moev eest veri kwikfast usign a bnech too-bai-fore as shrak-fightar stik wen de shraks attak

(6) yu pull up bechn bored and run outta de staydeeyum, into parking lot. Splash, splash! it's wet out here.
(6 v 1 + board) sumone in car run ober yu, trying to drive away from sherks. Dey den crash inta a light pole. It fall and smach de ruuf of der car and electrocute them. You are ded. New Character Y/N?

Get my way out of the shark.
Name: Allie
+1 to crazuh stunts

(6 v 2)Shark swim arund yer legs! Yu manaje to kick de shark away and get back on PawnShop Island. Dat was skerry!

"Alfred McReallyReallyLongAndObnoxiousName as his classmates called him when he was younger reluctantly withdraws his complaints."

Punch shark in the eye to establish dominance.

(1) Aww. yu punch with yer stump, and still manage to hit yourelf. I don't even know!
(4 -1) yu get your gud foot stuck in between two stadyum seets. dat not good eider.

(no hard feelings about the complaints. Feel free to express any concerns at all. This game is a mess, and is brutal. The GM is gonna be somewhat inconsistent, remembering only half of what's said, missing posts, and killing a lot of characters. Sometimes he might even NOT kill a character when he should. I hope everyone is enjoying it anyway )

[Sl4cker]

Cry out for help.

[wipeout1024]

Get to the middle of the island.
Name:Allie
+1 to crazuh stunts.

[Aslandus]

Name: Buddy Guyson

has teh mad sckihlz
Run past teh stupid crowd and outsides! Dey can drown for all I caer!