Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: [1] 2

Author Topic: Goldmoist  (Read 5009 times)

Skribbblie

  • Bay Watcher
  • Dlaglunkis slugutalbis!
    • View Profile
Goldmoist
« on: June 25, 2015, 02:52:53 pm »

Alright, here's the sitrep.

Dead fortress.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Fully-armed zombie army chasing a kitten.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Breached but unsecured aquifer.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Last dwarf, an animal dissector turned miner in less than four months, safe underground with food, drink, the last mining pick, and a single log.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Gentlemen, welcome to Goldmoist, population Thob Passagetreaty.
(Also caged duck and doomed kitten)


I did not originally intend to give a report on this fort. Nor did I expect it to turn out how it has. Everything was going swell, and after a year of failed attempts to get through the aquifer, we'd finally succeeded. And then the zombies came. Over 30 of them, in full soldier garb and armament, plus two necromancers who fled soon after.

Everyone on the surface died. Everyone who fled down the aquifer was murdered by a single zombie who jumped in after them (who still is likely wandering the first cavern layer).

It was inevitable.

Six dwarves were left alive, walled safely in the main fort with food and drink. One was a clothier who went melancholy from being unable to complete an artifact. One was a child. The other four were a soap maker, an animal caretaker, an unskilled peasant, and an animal dissector who became my miner.

And this miner has a mission.

A very important mission, which will enshrine the extinct dwarven nations forever in history, if she succeeds.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This plan was set in motion with the last five dwarves left (the clothier having recently gone insane). We dug a tunnel to the edge of the breached aquifer, and brought a small quantum stockpile of food, drink, an accidental barrel of seeds, and a few logs for utility purposes.

Everything was going okay, but the zombies found them before everything was secured.

Everyone died. Especially the livestock and pets. The miner fled to the surface, exposed and in imminent danger. The animal caretaker fled to an emergency access pipe for a water reactor we once had, in the interest of breaking through the aquifer (a hopeless endeavor which cost the life of our carpenter early on). The peasant, soap maker, and child were massacred at the entrance of the hastily-carved safe room. The animal caretaker was found and killed a few days later.

I ordered the miner to dig into the ground where she stood, in a desperate attempt to get through the aquifer breach.

With the entire zombie army in hot pursuit, she managed to get into the safe room and wall herself in with a fraction of the supplies we planned to bring with us. But a sizable fraction, large enough to keep a single dwarf alive for an extended period of time (and several plump helmet stews), plus a barrel of assorted seeds (mostly useless, but with lots of pig tail seeds).

She has everything she needs to stay alive, for now. And the faculties to memorialize the dead, which is good, because there are many dead.

But the goal isn't to stay alive.

The goal is to lose in the hardest possible way.

Because it's Fun.

And I intend to inform you all of what becomes of my beloved fort now.

By the way, if a moderator sees this, would you be a darling and move this thread to the stories board? Thank ya kindly.

EDIT: The aquifer breach has melted. There is no way in, and no way out of the caverns now. Not until winter, at least. And the caverns are rapidly filling with torrents of water. That's not very concerning, right?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

And the doomed kitten has finally died.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: June 25, 2015, 03:47:32 pm by Skribbblie »
Logged
I'm not really sure that maiming someone and forcing them to live with a crippling disability for your amusement can really be considered "merciful." Just sayin'.
Dwarven mercy.

TheFlame52

  • Bay Watcher
  • Certified geezer & only man to win 0.40.24
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #1 on: June 25, 2015, 04:20:07 pm »

Nice. Is the miner above or below the aquifer?

Loud Whispers

  • Bay Watcher
  • They said we have to aim higher, so we dug deeper.
    • View Profile
    • I APPLAUD YOU SIRRAH
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #2 on: June 25, 2015, 04:32:45 pm »

RIP Tibbles, kitten who stood against the horde.

Skribbblie

  • Bay Watcher
  • Dlaglunkis slugutalbis!
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #3 on: June 25, 2015, 04:37:16 pm »

Nice. Is the miner above or below the aquifer?
She is currently below the aquifer, while the zombies are patrolling diligently on the surface. The breached aquifer has melted, and there are no other entrances to the underground.

RIP Tibbles, kitten who stood against the horde.
He fought bravely.

I think. I didn't look at the combat logs, but it was probably a long and-

Nevermind.
Logged
I'm not really sure that maiming someone and forcing them to live with a crippling disability for your amusement can really be considered "merciful." Just sayin'.
Dwarven mercy.

Skribbblie

  • Bay Watcher
  • Dlaglunkis slugutalbis!
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #4 on: June 25, 2015, 06:43:44 pm »

Raw candy! Praise the miner(s)!


Now, before I crack into this delicious thing (NOT THAT I INTEND TO SAVE SCUM OR ANYTHING), I shall show you all the humble abode I have fashioned for my miner.

Here we have her little farm, which she's... pretty much neglected for no good reason. What a lazy lump.


And here we have her living quarters, and her slab-making workshop. In case of spooky ghosties.


Anyway, back to the CANDY
...

It's a dud :<
Logged
I'm not really sure that maiming someone and forcing them to live with a crippling disability for your amusement can really be considered "merciful." Just sayin'.
Dwarven mercy.

ImagoDeo

  • Bay Watcher
  • [NOT_THINK:UNTHINKABLE]
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #5 on: June 26, 2015, 01:29:32 am »

You haven't dug deep enough. All candy leads to the circus. It's just a matter of how far down you must go.
Logged
What would it be like to live in a world that was copy/pasted? Would we even notice? If not, how many times have we switched celestial harddrives or whatever?

Loud Whispers

  • Bay Watcher
  • They said we have to aim higher, so we dug deeper.
    • View Profile
    • I APPLAUD YOU SIRRAH
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #6 on: June 26, 2015, 07:57:17 am »

At least you know that layer has 0 clowns

Skribbblie

  • Bay Watcher
  • Dlaglunkis slugutalbis!
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #7 on: June 26, 2015, 05:39:27 pm »

If I preserved my dwarves half as well as I preserve my wagons...
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Alright, before I crack into this candy spire, I should set up some safety measures, to make sure my precious miner survives the armageddon...


So first, I'll-
Wait, what's this then?
IT CANNOT BE


Well, close enough. A few zombies stuck in an aquifer pool, and an undead boar.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

If I could deal with that boar, I wouldn't even have to worry about releasing the circus! I could retake the fort! But how could I possibly kill it...?


WHAT LUCK! An armed triggat caravan! I would praise the fact I modded them into the game, because now they're saving me, but the necromancer who attacked was also a triggat, so...


Well, I suppose I should deal with that.

Huzzah, the SHOWDOWN
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Splendid! Now I can set about securing the aquifer breach and combining the surface fort with the sub-aquifer emergency chambers, instead of ending all life on the surface as we know it! Because why go down in a blaze of glory when you can retake your rightfully dwarven lands and bring your nation back from the dead?

Now to just wall this off and- Nope, not dealing with you. There's no way into my fort from those caverns. Leave :<
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

OH GLORIOUS DAY! CAN IT BE TRUE?!
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Finally, a work force! The fortress shall be reborn! At least until the next undead invasion when we consider fortress suicide by clowns again.

And this is a rather useful dwarf. But such an unfortunate name.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Anyway, I intend to keep making updates on the state of things in my fort, if they become deliciously fun again. Until then, our mining picks shall stay off the candy killswitch.

Mostly.

Still undoubtedly the closest a fort of mine has ever come to ultimate fun without actually having it.
« Last Edit: June 26, 2015, 05:42:34 pm by Skribbblie »
Logged
I'm not really sure that maiming someone and forcing them to live with a crippling disability for your amusement can really be considered "merciful." Just sayin'.
Dwarven mercy.

Jigowah

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #8 on: June 26, 2015, 05:53:51 pm »

I was told there would be candy!

Good luck, and don't take this the wrong way, but I hope this goes horribly for you.

Reading this is just making me want to introduce my pop 200+ mountainhome to the HFS.  I might have to savescum just to see it.
Logged

Skribbblie

  • Bay Watcher
  • Dlaglunkis slugutalbis!
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #9 on: June 26, 2015, 06:35:28 pm »

don't take this the wrong way, but I hope this goes horribly for you.
I honestly hope so.

That seems terrible to say, but losing IS fun.

EDIT: Oh my. Those zombies were quite busy on the surface.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: June 26, 2015, 06:42:33 pm by Skribbblie »
Logged
I'm not really sure that maiming someone and forcing them to live with a crippling disability for your amusement can really be considered "merciful." Just sayin'.
Dwarven mercy.

Thisfox

  • Bay Watcher
  • Vixen.
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #10 on: June 26, 2015, 08:53:31 pm »

I'm enjoying this story. I love the idea of the fortress surviving, don't dig up the circus just yet.

...By the way, what's a Triggat?...
Logged
Mules gotta spleen. Dwarfs gotta eat.
Thisfox likes aquifers, olivine, Forgotten Beasts for their imagination, & dorfs for their stupidity. She prefers to consume gin & tonic. She absolutely detests Facebook.
"Urist McMason died out of pure spite to make you wonder why he was suddenly dead"
Oh god... Plump Helmet Man Mimes!

NW_Kohaku

  • Bay Watcher
  • [ETHIC:SCIENCE_FOR_FUN: REQUIRED]
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #11 on: June 26, 2015, 09:42:50 pm »

Might I recommend a few dwarves put into segregated living quarters, isolated via drawbridge from everything as a safety measure? 

I've often found that no fort ever has to crumble.  You can wait almost any problem out with sufficient sacrifices to Armok migrant waves.
Logged
Personally, I like [DF] because after climbing the damned learning cliff, I'm too elitist to consider not liking it.
"And no Frankenstein-esque body part stitching?"
"Not yet"

Improved Farming
Class Warfare

Skribbblie

  • Bay Watcher
  • Dlaglunkis slugutalbis!
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #12 on: June 27, 2015, 02:43:20 am »

Status report: All's well.

Mostly.

The fort was attacked by two werebeasts, with rather negligible casualties (only one per attack), and we killed the first beast.

And we cleaned up every last body on the surface! No necromancer fuel here, no sir!

Look at all them 41 happy dorfs!
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

And we successfully secured the aquifer breach, so we're free to pass from surface to stone and back again!
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

And now we're working on individual bedrooms, with all the bodies cleaned up, a mountain of wood stockpiled, and all the slabs engraved (with a few to spare). I'm also working on making a large underground farm in the stone layer, just because.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

And NO DAMMIT, GO AWAY, I'M NOT DEALING WITH YOU, EITHER
Spoiler (click to show/hide)


I'm enjoying this story. I love the idea of the fortress surviving, don't dig up the circus just yet.

...By the way, what's a Triggat?...

Triggats are a race I modded into the game. They are very shrewd and paranoid creatures bent on being completely secure and safe (thus choosing highly inhospitable climates to call home, where no one else would dare to live, except for ambitious Armok-led dwarves). They believe in a powerful government, but do not trust anyone, and even go as far as to hide their facial expressions with masks. They also believe in the heretical notion of sciences (as opposed to !!SCIENCE!!).

They are as tall as a dwarf/treehugger/child-rescuer, and they have unique weapons. They also have some unique common clothing items (like masks and turbans being practically mandatory).

They have a unique shield called the Curtain Shield, which is very expensive, and over 33% better at blocking things than the standard shield (as in, regular shield has something like 20 block chance, and curtain shield has 35), but otherwise have no other unique pieces of armor.

Their unique weapons are:
The Hook Hammer, a slightly inferior edged war hammer.*
The Battle Gavel, a slightly superior mace.*
The Inert Pylon, a pike which can be wielded by short races, and comparable in power to the normal pike.*
The Scythe, a very large "axe" which is seemingly superior to the standard axe.*
The Tree Cleaver, a rather large sword which is nonetheless one-handed, for the sake of avoiding certain bugs.
The Pump Gun, a "crossbow" that fires small pump darts, and comes with a bayonet for melee combat, making it a particularly dangerous, but not necessarily overpowered weapon.
The Tanto, a dagger weapon designed solely for stabbing.
And the Baton (my favorite), which is a... blunt sword. It's a blunt sword. I made an edged hammer and a blunt sword. Anyway, it's an amusing weapon, and combined with the curtain shield, the triggats essentially have riot police.

And they have a trap weapon (yet untested) called the Caltrop. Which is "pointy". And very cheap to manufacture. No word yet on how weak/overpowered/balanced it is.

*According to my arena tests

Other facts are that they use both underground and aboveground crops, can work with steel, are incapable of the mannerisms of laughter and smiling, settle mostly in deserts and tundras, use the same site designs as dwarves, have pink blood, have ONLY_IF_SANCTIONED for the majority of their ethics (including TREASON), have armed guards on their caravans, and their "friendly" color is red, so it looks rather menacing when they are conducting trade deals with your triggat fortress.

Oh, and they are "innately psychic". To a small degree. What this gives them is a special attack called the MINDGRAPPLE... which, in literal application, is like a blunt, quicker-than-normal bite with higher priority. With their eyes. It's not good at all at dealing decisive killing blows, but when targeted at unshielded flesh can lead to some torn arteries.

I think that's mostly everything... I haven't published them or anything because I'm not sure I'm done fiddling with them quite yet. I MIGHT be, but I also might want to add unique crops and such, or unique armor.

Might I recommend a few dwarves put into segregated living quarters, isolated via drawbridge from everything as a safety measure? 

I've often found that no fort ever has to crumble.  You can wait almost any problem out with sufficient sacrifices to Armok migrant waves.

I've honestly had very few forts crumble. The ones that did were either by undead birds (and soon after, undead pack animals) in the first few days, or by the combined powers of tantrum spiral, forgotten beast, angry ghosts, and goblin invasion pure ☼fun☼ over the course of several very amusing years, yet coming together seamlessly in the end to finish everything off.

I abandoned a few in the past, due to not knowing any better. Nowadays, I fight till the last, and usually "win" and restore the fort to elevated glory.
Logged
I'm not really sure that maiming someone and forcing them to live with a crippling disability for your amusement can really be considered "merciful." Just sayin'.
Dwarven mercy.

Loud Whispers

  • Bay Watcher
  • They said we have to aim higher, so we dug deeper.
    • View Profile
    • I APPLAUD YOU SIRRAH
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #13 on: June 27, 2015, 03:32:39 pm »

Till the end or the brink of survival, Goldmoist has done well for itself already

Skribbblie

  • Bay Watcher
  • Dlaglunkis slugutalbis!
    • View Profile
Re: Goldmoist
« Reply #14 on: June 27, 2015, 09:57:24 pm »

Things have been mostly peaceful in the fort, minus a few really really stupid dwarfy incidents, such as my second miner walking into an opened aquifer space immediately after it was dug, in winter, thus flash-freezing himself in a split second and having fun instantly.

And also when someone deconstructed some stairs beneath my broker while he was miraculously standing on the top step of the stairs. Thus resulting in him falling at least 20 z-levels to his untimely fun.

On the bright side, three artifacts have been made; two of them were made with a single item, by possessed nobles, and the third is a wooden crown made by a child, which depicts the ascension of the first dwarf king to the throne. Not too bad.

My pointless goal of irrigating and planting a semi-deep underground farm will soon show results. We've channeled a frozen aquifer to the site, and now we just have to wait until the spring melt.

Oh look, more migrants!

Why is this child moving so slow...?


... ARMOK ALMIGHTY! WHAT IS THIS ABOMINATION!?





o ∆o...
What.

AND IT DOESN'T HAVE A MOTHER, BUT IT HAS A FATHER


... AND ITS FATHER HAS TWO DAUGHTERS, BUT THEY ARE NOT SISTERS



THIS IS THE WORK OF THE CIRCUSMASTER!!!!!!
« Last Edit: June 27, 2015, 10:04:00 pm by Skribbblie »
Logged
I'm not really sure that maiming someone and forcing them to live with a crippling disability for your amusement can really be considered "merciful." Just sayin'.
Dwarven mercy.
Pages: [1] 2