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Author Topic: The Infinite Heavens: More than one way to skin a cat.  (Read 352074 times)

Xantalos

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #105 on: June 11, 2015, 02:14:37 pm »

FUCKING PLEASE GIVE ME YOUR FUCKING LIGHTER PLEASE
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XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
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((The Xantalos Die: [1, 1, 1, 6, 6, 6]))

Beirus

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #106 on: June 11, 2015, 02:47:15 pm »

"Better. And I better get it back. Cigarettes don't light themselves."
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Because everything is Megaman when you have an arm cannon.

Xantalos

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #107 on: June 11, 2015, 03:06:23 pm »

Thank you. And of course you'll get it back, I'm not a thief.
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Sig! Onol
Quote from: BFEL
XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
Quote from: Toaster
((The Xantalos Die: [1, 1, 1, 6, 6, 6]))

renegadelobster

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #108 on: June 11, 2015, 04:06:06 pm »

Nah, it was an excellent idea! Keep trying!
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Well, it only hates Linux for now. If we could condition it to hate computer viruses, than hooray! Free, brutal virus protection! Unless you have Linux!

~Neri

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #109 on: June 11, 2015, 04:39:46 pm »

((If we go ramping, odds are is the bonestealer will fall off on impact~))

Smack him with the meatflap~! I didn't hear anything about it stealing my hand!
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piecewise

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #110 on: June 11, 2015, 06:39:15 pm »

Now where the heck is irony

IronyOwl

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #111 on: June 11, 2015, 10:12:50 pm »

Pry its fingers off the roll cage, preferably as we're turning.

((There is no way I could come to regret touching this thing's hands.))
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Quote from: Radio Controlled (Discord)
A hand, a hand, my kingdom for a hot hand!
The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.

piecewise

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #112 on: June 11, 2015, 11:24:49 pm »

Patiently wait to become Plot-Relevant. Maybe hum a little tune.
You're 9th in the waitlist. Hold your butt.

Good now continue to do that for a while.

Nah, it was an excellent idea! Keep trying!
[3]
You manage to wiggle your way to the surface of the pile, but can't get any bones attached to your skull. Waiting for you at the surface of the pile is a tight ring of bone thieves. They're staring at you with their hollow faces.


Ken begins punching its skull repeatedly.
((If we go ramping, odds are is the bonestealer will fall off on impact~))

Smack him with the meatflap~! I didn't hear anything about it stealing my hand!
[4][2]
You screech and roar, bearing your great big gorilla fangs, before backhanding the thing across the face with your deboned arm. The blow is powerful, with enough force to push the giant creature away from you and clearly stun it. Unfortunately, the feeling of all the nerves in your arm clapping together is enough to render you instantly unconscious.  You slump down in your seat and your foot pushes the gas pedal to the floor.


Pry its fingers off the roll cage, preferably as we're turning.

((There is no way I could come to regret touching this thing's hands.))
You reach over Ken's unconscious body and grab the Bone Thief's arms by the wrists.  You brace yourself against the center console and push upward with all your might. The thing's grip falters and slips.

Fucking - yellow round guy! Give me your lighter!

Attempt to obtain lighter from pac-man. Once obtained, use my skill at lighting stuff on fire to light the bone stealer on fire.
You snatch the proffered lighter from Tarmac's hand and then quickly dig through your trash bag of food until you find what you're looking for: A bottle of high proof booze. You take a huge mouthful of it and then strike a flame on the lighter. You shove your way past Tarmac and stand up on the back seat so that you're face to face with the Bone Thief. You hold the lighter to your lips and breathe a cloud of burning alcohol straight onto the thing's face.




The Bone Thief falls off the Jeep, head on fire, and goes rolling and bouncing through the eyesand with a series of heavy wet slaps. It vanishes into the distance behind the uneven ground as the jeep pulls away, in reverse, going full speed.

~Neri

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #113 on: June 11, 2015, 11:26:19 pm »

Wake up.
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Xantalos

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #114 on: June 12, 2015, 01:00:41 am »

Get the unconcious gorilla off the gas and slow the jeep down so we can get our shit in order.
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XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
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renegadelobster

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #115 on: June 12, 2015, 01:13:09 am »

"...well hi there! I was wondering if maybe you fine beings would be able to help me. As you can see I am a skull, but I used to be an entire skeleton. If you fine beings could help me with that, I most certainly would be willing to help you in your endeavours. So what say you?"

Talky talk
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Well, it only hates Linux for now. If we could condition it to hate computer viruses, than hooray! Free, brutal virus protection! Unless you have Linux!

IronyOwl

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #116 on: June 12, 2015, 02:16:15 am »

"HaHA! None can stand against the might of Golgon the Destroyer and... The Flaming Menace! HA HA HA HA!"

Laugh and boast triumphantly and reassuringly.
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Quote from: Radio Controlled (Discord)
A hand, a hand, my kingdom for a hot hand!
The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.

Xantalos

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #117 on: June 12, 2015, 02:17:21 am »

My name is Xankarvo the Grand, if you'd care to incorporate it in your boasts.
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Sig! Onol
Quote from: BFEL
XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
Quote from: Toaster
((The Xantalos Die: [1, 1, 1, 6, 6, 6]))

piecewise

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #118 on: June 12, 2015, 09:54:06 am »

Wake up.
[3]
You grumble and twitch.

Get the unconcious gorilla off the gas and slow the jeep down so we can get our shit in order.
[5]
You crawl up into the front seat and lift Ken's foot off the gas and drop it down onto the brake. You then hold the wheel and make sure the jeep doesn't ramp off any dunes before it comes to a stop.

"HaHA! None can stand against the might of Golgon the Destroyer and... The Flaming Menace! HA HA HA HA!"

Laugh and boast triumphantly and reassuringly.
You stand up in your seat and shout taunts back in the general direction of the bone thief.

"...well hi there! I was wondering if maybe you fine beings would be able to help me. As you can see I am a skull, but I used to be an entire skeleton. If you fine beings could help me with that, I most certainly would be willing to help you in your endeavours. So what say you?"

Talky talk
This attempt goes poorly for you.  The last thing you see is a bunch of hands reaching down towards you, and the last thing you think of is that scene from Troll 2. It is a most unfortunate way to go.

Have fun reincarnating elsewhere Shawn!
« Last Edit: June 12, 2015, 10:29:12 am by piecewise »
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piecewise

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Re: The Infinite Heavens: Tourist Trap
« Reply #119 on: June 12, 2015, 10:10:41 am »

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