So whilst one of the players is away, another of my players is going to run a Stars Without Numbers game, which is essentially a pulp fiction space RPG. I've decided to go with a backworld character, and the following is my concept:
Name: Ilmenster the Mage, Sage of Shadows, The Great Overspacorceror, Doombringer of Mysteries, Old Stinkbeard, Put That Pipe Out That Tank's Filled With Pure Oxygen
Race: Human
Age: Venerable
Class: Psychic Space Wizard
I survived Stars Without Number!
The game opens on a space station with the local big-wig making noise about an asteroid mining outpost that's gone quiet a few days ago. We get paid half up front to go take a shuttle and check it out.
I, the crotchety old space wizard, demand payment in gold pieces instead of these new-fangled credit things.
We get to the space station and get knocked unconscious when we find a mysterious psychic egg macguffin, awaking later with patchy memories.
I immediately declare this to be a dragon's egg, spawn of Tiamat herself. I assign my lack of memories as being due to wizard pipe-weed, then blaze up a fresh bowl.
We advance deeper into the outpost, getting attacked by robot-spiders named gremlins which somehow seem to decide I'm the tastiest looking meat-sack on the abandoned station. The GM is looking eager to encourage the space-wizard's early retirement, it seems. Fortunately my Mage Armor protects me from serious injury until my allies blast them to bits.
Not taking any more of this guff, I decide to screw caution because I'm a wizard, damnit. The enemies should be afraid of me, not the other way around. We find the comms room, our tech expert tries to fix the uplink for the outpost and ignore the bloodstains on the floor, but the power cuts out. Our techie rolled well on the computers check and scored a full map of the outpost before the system crashed, and I demand she show me the site of the wellspring of arcane energies on her magical mapping scroll.
So throwing caution to the wind, I charge into the reactor room, disturbing another nest of robot spiders. I win initiative and cast a
grenade fireball.
The GM takes to shuffling his notes and trying to figure out how to salvage his story-line whilst I shout to my allies that the danger has been eradicated. Eventually the GM decides that the reactor's salvageable but will take several hours of work to fix, which is fine since I strike out to explore the rest of the station, leaving the more technically minded to fiddle with the scorched remains of the reactor. I find the medical bay, and spend the next few hours inventing recreational ways of experiencing the contents of their drug cabinet.
Time passes. Rolls are made. Eventually the GM declares that the reactor is fixed and everyone returns to the comms room, except me. I've seen everything there is to see on this outpost and I'm ready to go, so I decide to hang out around the airlock. They hail the space station and transmit valuable information in the form of crew logs and reports, but of course there's a jamming signal that cuts off their transmission. Space pirates are inbound!
Everyone starts reinforcing the comms room in preparation for attack, but I'm still in the airlock. They're torn between letting me know about the pirates or not, but eventually decide to try calling me back. I calmly refill my pipe and ignore them with a crafty gleam in my eye. The pirates dock, the airlock opens, I roll for initiative and nail it. First pirate gets a fireball to the face before he's taken a single step, and I redecorate the inside of the airlock in chunky red pirate salsa.
The other two are smarter and decide to take cover around the corner inside their ship. They fire at me from their cover and miss, then it's back to my turn again. I pull the pin on another fireball and put a little English on it, curving it neatly around the corner as it makes a very satisfying splash of body parts in response. Then I just stand there in the airlock, leaning on my wizard's staff, calmly smiling whilst I wait for my allies to come and mop up the mess in our brand new ex-pirate spaceship.
We discover one of the pirates is none other than a former employee of the mining outpost, though identification is tricky when the body's mostly medium rare hamburger meat. Still, it's enough to get us going to their last known mining site, a large asteroid near the outpost. We dock at the asteroid mining site after some skill checks by our pilot, board the habitat, and find the survivors of the dig crew holed up inside a storage area.
They tell us they found a strange pre-tech artefact inside the asteroid, from which came the macguffin. I tell them it's nonsense as it's obviously a dragon egg, holding it out to them. The egg starts to suddenly grow hot to the touch, and the GM says it's so hot I drop it. Bugger that, I say. I declare that I want to make a Mental check to force myself to channel whatever power this egg is emitting into myself. The GM says that's fine, but with an evil grin he warns me that failure will probably explode my head. The DC is 12 on a d20 roll, and I've got a +2 increase in the DC because the GM says this is an extremely dangerous power I'm attempting to channel. Death or glory, I pick up my dice and roll it.
Natural. 20.
The table explodes and the GM throws his hands up and admits defeat. We steamroll the final wave of robot spiders, my space wizard glowing with burning power as he unleashes hellfire into the swarm. We eventually discover the ancient pre-tech facility, which is described as an opaque orb that gradually turns transparent as we approach with the egg. Inside we see an organic looking altar with a curved cup at waist height exactly the right size for holding the egg.
I take one look at it and say "I'mma rub my nuts on it."
After thoroughly desecrating the ancient structure and being threatened by my allies at knife-point to my family jewels, eventually I surrender the altar to it's intended use. We get a light-show of some star maps showing interesting places for further adventures, a psychic contact with otherworldly beings who don't take kindly to suggestions they're dragons and therefore ought to be slain and turned into armor, and then we're back on our merry way to return to the space station with the rescued miners.
Overall, I had a lot of fun, and it was a good break to get to play a character again. Despite being reckless to the extreme, the dice smiled upon me this time, and if we ever run another Stars Without Numbers, I'll be sure to bring back Ilmenster the Mad for an encore.