With the Dwarves of Reignboot losing their colective minds over the mashed-elf pile in front of the fort, a hero was chosen to infiltrate the Elven homeland and defeat them once and for all. They must be stopped before more of their bodies can be allowed choke out doorway and lead to mental strife.
A merry band was chosen, consisting of Bim the Grizzly Bear Man warrior, his trusty sidekick Nish the Dwarven Drunk, the goblin sage Nuglush, and the Elven Bowman Stasost. It was decided that the party should travel and bond over poetry and drunken revelry on their way North. And on their second week of travel, they heard news of a small camp of bandits to the West of a small hamlet they were staying in. It was decided to liberate the land from the criminals first, as this should be no problem for such a well-armed group.
The party had, in the previous weeks, slain a group of dark elves on the march and even Nuglush the sage had proven to be a fierce opponent. And Bim himself was already locally famous for beating a horse to death with its own foal. And then knocking a giant lark unconscious by throwing the dead horse's heart at it.
After a few more day's travel, the party arrived at the camp and found a lone goblin guarding the road. Bim engaged the goblin in a heated debate over the value of law. The goblin lost the debate when Bim took his head off with his iron axe.
Deeper in the camp were a sleeping human and a sleeping goblin bandit. The Master of the camp, however, was awake. Bim again engaged the leader in debate over law and order. The Master claimed not to care abut anything but martial prowess, and Bim agreed to settle things that way.
Bim slashed with his sword, and the Master ducked aside. As Bim came around for a second swing, he realized with some disappointment that his shield-paw had been lopped clean off. The battle was already over.
Bim dropped to his knees and, not knowing what else to do, asked the Master to become his lieutenant. The Master merely shook his head and said Bim wasn't good enough. And that made Bim mad, but he wasn't stupid. There had to be a way out of this situation, as clearly the Master could kill them all without breaking a sweat.
It was then that nish the Dwarven Drunk decided it was a good time to stab the Master in the foot with his copper dagger. Bim saw his opportnity, grabbed the rest of his friends, and ran away while the Master expertly butchered the poor dwarf. Bim, in his rage, choked the sleeping goblin bandit to death on the way out of the camp, insuring bad blood beween the parties forevermore.
Now Bim and his pals sits beneath the ruins of an ancient Kobold fort, commiserating over muddy water and horse meat while they heal their injuries and decide what to do next. Being a hero isn't always as glorious as they say...