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[Shonai_Dweller]

And the fortress has fallen. Well pretty much. There's a few dorfs laid up in hospital (one of whom just gave birth) but the sudden 150 strong dark elf ambush including their their various giant pets has proved too much, coming right on the heels of a human invasion.

Giant gila monsters are ignoring the hospital right now, preferring to roam the caverns picking off the remains of the serpent people. Dark Elves swooping in on their giant ravens are predictably stuck behind trees and have killed the fps.

73 guests continue to obliviously socialize and spout poetry down in the tavern.

Since there's a squad out in the world somewhere, I guess the fortress won't crumble even when the hospitalized dorfs die. Will just have to abandon.

Oh, but this ambush doesn't count as a siege for some reason so the option to retire is still available. Interesting. Knowing unretire bugs, that'll probably end up with giant gila monsters and dark elves hanging out in the tavern as if nothing happened.

--edit
Migrants!
...
are all dead. 💀

[StagnantSoul]

Welp, I derped my fortress defense, somehow. The main fort had been closed in with walls, a roof, and a gatehouse. Under the fort, in one of the warehouses, was a pathway to the mine, with gates always closed except during emergencies. On top of the stairway to the mains was an always up drawbridge, which would open/cover the hole as the one raised at the main gate, so one lever would cut off access to the mines and main fort while opening an underground path to the fort... Problem is, for some reason, the puller double pulled, leaving half the underground gates open, other half shut, the main gate open, and the mines shut. After we beat the siege I fixed it using other levers, but on a second pull it worked like it was supposed to... Very odd.

[Urist McWaffles]

After handling the goblin siege with minimal fuss, I decided to turn my attention back to our worthless layabout visitors...

So I decided to turn the tavern into a giant pinball inspired death machine.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

In hindsight, I should have built 2 more bridges but the 2 I had did the job ...more or less...

I put a repeat task on lever pulling and sat back and watched while the bridges did their grim work.

Starting with the remaining 13 dwarfs (one had been killed by the failed weregoat massacre.) the mashing machine started it's visitor termination.

Down to just 4 visitors in fairly short order:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I should mention that I did wait quite some time for the human diplomat to vacate the premise before I began but my patience wore thin and well...  sometimes if you want to make an omellete you have to atomize a few humans.

And then there was one:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Aban absolutely paralyzed in fear as he watched his compatriots slowly and methodically smushed into paste.

I waited some time for the last dwarf to happen upon one of the bridges but it was taking far too long so eventually sent in the military to sort him out.

I think I'm done with this fort now. 
*Lights match*

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Kat]

was specifying images for my sculptors, so that my temples have statues of the appropriate deity.

Found that there was an ettin with the same first name as one of the deities.

Turns out, that ettin was the daughter of two other ettins, which I wasn't aware of - I didn't know ettins and other semi-megabeasts had children.

Looking into things, I found that the mother ettin was herself a child of two other ettins.

And the grandmother ettin, had two children with one male ettin, and one child with a different male ettin. Both male ettins were still alive, which I found interesting. They're obviously not as monogamous as dwarfs normally are.

Makes me wonder which other megabeasts & semi-megabeasts have this kind of history.

[scourge728]

So you know the visitor bug, well... who then proceeded to do this... followed by this individual

[martinuzz]

The dwarven caravan brought some prepared honey bee brain. I suspect the Mountainhomes of child labour. Need very small dwarf fingers to get them brains out of a bee.

[se05239]

The dwarven caravan brought some prepared honey bee brain. I suspect the Mountainhomes of child labour. Need very small dwarf fingers to get them brains out of a bee.

You say it like its a bad thing. I'd love to put the children in my fort to work.

[martinuzz]

Finally, in year 17 of the fort, with no more spies arriving after two atom smashings (which is probably why the elves declared war on me), I decided to chance it and build a tavern open to all visitors, to see if maybe the visitor bug has died out.
So far it looks like it has, only got 3 guests dripping in and they look legit.
Although the human crossbowman that just arrived does not have a crossbow, but he is wearing an artefact ring and an artefact earring, and carrying a book.

Also, why do so many visitors wear dwarf / elf / human bone trinkets nowadays? Didn't that use to be restricted to vampires?

EDIT: I named the tavern, which designated under the same bridge that atomsmashed the bugged spies, "The Smeared Spirits".

[Kat]

Also, why do so many visitors wear dwarf / elf / human bone trinkets nowadays? Didn't that use to be restricted to vampires?

What is the visitor bug ?

And... what if those visitors are vampires ? 

[☼Another☼]

The ethic 'MAKE_TROPHY_SAPIENT' determines whether or not they make trophies from well, sapients. So the Human Civ/Civs in your world like have that as allowed.

[ZM5]

Over the last few in-game months, I sent out my military to nab some artifacts from the local pelagic civ.

They successfully stole them, however they were spotted as they were leaving - so I guess I can expect a siege at some point. I welcome the opportunity.

Some of the artifacts that I stole I sold to merchants from the nearby friendly civs - Erebians, Gnomes and Dark Dwarves. Those ones are their issue now.

Forsaken caravan from my civ came by - absolutely loaded with stuff, including cats. Gonna buy those - need them to fight off the vermin infestation (oddly enough, the vermin won the battle with the kittens that I had before - they were bitten and eventually died from infection). Have two stolen artifacts remaining, so the caravan should be easy to buy off.

Surely selling the artifacts of angry, eldritch deity-worshipping fish-people will not backfire horribly.

[warwizard]

Well I had a Giantess come in uninvited, but she must have heard of my dragon slaying sword dwarf so she hung out in the upper right corner of the embark, not engaging my dwarves.

 The season turns to spring and the elven caravan appears, 4 tiles from the Giantess...  It appears that once again the elves will fail to trade with me due to encountering megabeasts. Nature must take it's course, and the nature lovers are getting a fine dose of nature.

Edit, Well the rest of the caravan showed up and they all started to gang fight her, she got in one good scratch on one of the elven legs, so one is crawling and rolling... but after a bit the Giantess got knocked out, and I have some 36 pages in the combat report with elves hitting her on the head and doing next to nothing.


After a real world half an hour of the elves attacking the Giantess, I see everybody is unconscious from over exertion, so I order my dwarves to go in, the first squad is wrestlers... they all gain a rank in striking then get exhausted, so I order in my second squad... and yup the dragon slayer gets the kill with his steel shortsword.

[pikachu17]

Apparently it was a bad idea to raid two different goblin civs. Now there are only about 50 dwarves in the other remaining fortress, and the other fortress has been destroyed.

[☼Another☼]

Apparently the humans aren't doing well in my world. They sent me a diplomat, who also happens to be their law-maker. I checked their other nobles, and they have a Criminal as their war-leader, a general, and that's it. I get the feeling that the 'diplomat' is more taking refuge than seeking diplomatic ties. Then again, my fort is the only dwarven settlement left in the world (and I have the queen) so I'll say that the leaders are here to discuss the goblin threat.

[Paralyzoid]

I have a bugged Roc flying overhead that I wasn't fast enough to cage trap.

Then a goblin siege just showed up.

Time to feed the roc.