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[TheFlame52]

MAGMA CRAB HAS GIVEN BIRTH TO TRIPLETS

FUCK GET OFF MY MAP

[Demonic Gophers]

My third, and currently last, miner just went into a secretive mood.  Miners have been responsible for three out of ten moods in my current fortress.  Two of the moods were children.  NONE of my metalworkers have had moods.

[Corona688]

Didn't know olms could fly...

[Max™]

I was reading topics when the caravan began to leave. So I didn't unlock the gate for them...
When I unpaused the game, I found this:

*merchant standing there looking at a little sundial on his wrist, tapping his toe on the ground by the gate*

'I swear to some awful goblin deity if I don't get out of here soon, I mean, the rudeness, keeping us here waiting for nothing?'

*shortly afterwards*

'Ok this getting ridiculous, now my watch is broken, no wait, is it freaking raining? I swear, I am literally angry enough to punch a donkey in the brain...'

*the other merchant looks somewhat alarmed*

'Heh, good thing we don't gotta worry about tha-'

"HEE-HAW!!!"

MAGMA CRAB HAS GIVEN BIRTH TO TRIPLETS

FUCK OFF MY MAP

I read this without the "get" and it amused the hell out of me.

How are they getting stung through full plate

Maybe they get in-between the armor parts and then sting?

'Did you hear what happened to Doren the other day?'

"No, why, she get another bee stuck in her beard?"

'Hah, not this time, it got stuck in her armor this time, poor girl just starts ranting and clawing at her breastplate, after the merchant punched that donkey in the brain we figured it must be contagious or something but usually berserkers don't tear off a piece of armor and run 30 floors downstairs to punch a beekeeper in the nose.'

*laughter ensues*

[StubbornAlcoholic]

I had a giant eyeless fire-breathing bull come out of the cavern layer and murder every other living creature down there.

It then ran into an emaciated giant grasshopper with "deadly dust". After roasting the grasshopper to death, the bull (who had been thoroughly covered in the dust) suddenly started having all it's fat melt all over the place.

A useless Fishery Worker lurched into the caverns and attracted it's wrath, promptly getting burned himself. Fortunately his sacrifice enabled me to trap the creature with my bridges. So now I have a "pet" giant, eyeless, fire-breathing bull with all it's body fat melted off...

[NJW2000]

Mayor just went into a fey mood. This is my second fortress, and this also happened with the first mayor I had.

What is it with mayors?

Also, will I have to replace him again?

[TheFlame52]

I had a giant eyeless fire-breathing bull come out of the cavern layer and murder every other living creature down there.

It then ran into an emaciated giant grasshopper with "deadly dust". After roasting the grasshopper to death, the bull (who had been thoroughly covered in the dust) suddenly started having all it's fat melt all over the place.

A useless Fishery Worker lurched into the caverns and attracted it's wrath, promptly getting burned himself. Fortunately his sacrifice enabled me to trap the creature with my bridges. So now I have a "pet" giant, eyeless, fire-breathing bull with all it's body fat melted off...

You're well on your way to becoming a forgotten beast tamer! Try to catch a GCS and that will be the final step!

[NJW2000]

He made an artifact bracelet of 1.3 or so times the value of the first mayor's artifact, a mug.

The artifact name: Stillpresent.

Spoo-ooky.

[Dutrius]

New fort! The Hammers of Smiling.
So, I embarked on a volcano with a nearby stream. I was preparing the water reactors for pumping lava out of the volcano mouth.

This was my first time using pumps, and I forgot to wall off the outflow tile on the initial pump. So my pump operator comes and suddenly OMG WATER EVERWHERE!



I have since ordered all the pumps to have a wall around the outflow tile.



Artefact time! I've had two artefacts so far, one was a possession. A migrant wave had just arrived, and halfway to the fortress one of the migrant hunters got possessed and claimed a craftsdwarf workshop. He ended up making an obsidian amulet.

Lenodazin (Seedwatched): This is an obsidian amulet. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with cushion obsidian cabochons, decorated with sheep wool and encircled with bands of octagon cut pyrites.

The second artefact was when a migrant bowyer went into a fey mood and claimed a bowyers workshop. I was expecting a crossbow or something else useful, but no. He just had to make a blowgun didn't he?

Astelkes (The Allied Scratch): This is an oaken blowgun. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encircled with bands of oak. This object menaces with spikes of persimmon wood. On the item is an image of a tall cross in oak. On the item is an image of Tun Channelmansions the dwarf in morion. Tun Channelmansions is labouring. The artwork relates to the settling of the dwarf Tun Channelmansions in The Hammer of Smiling  in the early autumn of 125.

[kahrkunne]

I have 30 or 40 dwarves hauling gold ore and the end is finally (after a looooong time) coming in sight. Trying to find something to do with my gold. Gold tables, weapon racks, cabinets, bridges, gold everything. Encrusted with gems, too.

[callisto8413]

Sadly, while playing my 2012 Three-tiered Dwarf Society Fortress I have been crashing to desktop.  I am so close to my goal of seeing what the children born in the Fortress will become - maybe a few in-game months.  Then I can stop and start a new Fortress with the current version.  I want to try a new Fortress, with the sole goal of making a utopia - using all the knowledge I have built up over the years.  Making well designed bedrooms, grand dining rooms, wide hallways, easy to navigate stairways and ramps, going for both functional YET beautiful levels.  Maybe an Island Fortress so I don't have to worry about sieges and getting too many Dwarfs.

Using all the tricks of the trade I have learned from the forum.  I just have to complete this GAME first.   

[Immortal-D]

This just happened.  See if you can figure out why I'm confused;

[MehMuffin]

Okay, lungfish. If you really think you can fly.

[Spehss _]

Okay, lungfish. If you really think you can fly.

"There is no 'think we can', only 'we can' and 'we can not.' And there is no 'we can not.' " --Lungfish

Really, DF lungfish are magical creatures that can fly and phase through solid rock.

[TechnoXan]

Sadly, while playing my 2012 Three-tiered Dwarf Society Fortress I have been crashing to desktop.  I am so close to my goal of seeing what the children born in the Fortress will become - maybe a few in-game months.  Then I can stop and start a new Fortress with the current version.  I want to try a new Fortress, with the sole goal of making a utopia - using all the knowledge I have built up over the years.  Making well designed bedrooms, grand dining rooms, wide hallways, easy to navigate stairways and ramps, going for both functional YET beautiful levels.  Maybe an Island Fortress so I don't have to worry about sieges and getting too many Dwarfs.

Using all the tricks of the trade I have learned from the forum.  I just have to complete this GAME first.

Sadly you could embark wherever you want and still probably wouldn't get anything good.