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[Max™]

Kay.

These are troubling developments, perhaps we abused nature too much, and it has finally had enough of our shit?

[utunnels]

Kay.

These are troubling developments, perhaps we abused nature too much, and it has finally had enough of our shit?

Looks like the animals are just playing with each other.

[Broseph Stalin]

Looks like the animals are just playing with each other.

My bear preceded and followed this playing with attempts to dismember the kiwi lady.

[Col_Jessep]

Kay.

We have some questions...

It's called foreplay... =3

While the marsh titan with poisonous bite turned out to be a little bitch and fell to my half-trained hammer dorf squad the giant desert scorpion already claimed two, one experienced axedorf in full metal armor among them. I don't even...

[Lapoleon]

Still working on my aboveground fortress, everything is fine and dandy and more houses have been put up. Going slower than hoped due to the influx of two barons who need a house for them self. Mostly working on building a pretty town which has been surrounded by a low silty clay wall. I've killed a giantess by mobbing her with my hunters and she went down with only one wounded and a killed dog. Then a Minotaur arrived, I thought they could hardly be scarier than a giant but I still closed the gate and put my archer militia on the wall. I was proven wrong as the Minotaur pulled my marksdwarves from the wall and started tearing them apart. After recruiting most of the population in suicide squads and bumrushing the creature (which had previously worked well against an early goblin siege) the massacre truly started. The Minotaur kept tearing people apart, goring them and in general just creating carnage. 15 dead dwarves later he got tired and was finally swamped but my dwarves are looking at one hell of a clean up operation. Luckily I'd already finished the tombs so at least the bodies can get dragged away quickly.

[Arx]

While the marsh titan with poisonous bite turned out to be a little bitch and fell to my half-trained hammer dorf squad the giant desert scorpion already claimed two, one experienced axedorf in full metal armor among them. I don't even...

Marsh titans don't rip the axes from your dwarves' hands and hack them to death with them.

[utunnels]

Blood is everywhere.
It appears no one has died, yet.
A dwarf and his dog was hit by a demon's dust attack and it appeared that caused massive bleeding.
Now all 100 levels are now painted red, horrible.

[taptap]

Just built a water reactor that toggles with a lever pull. Now I need a way to do this in larger scale.

[Broseph Stalin]

I got sold queer pigs. They just sit around not eating and not mating.

[Erkki]

I got sold queer pigs. They just sit around not eating and not mating.

+1 for movie ref.

[The Bard]

One of my marksdwarves is trolling me.

After trying everything to get him to just pick up some damn bolts, I got angry and [d]umped his quiver. After d-b-[c]laiming it again, he ran out of the training room, picked up his apparently precious quiver....

Then announced he was gong back to the barracks to 'Lead Hammer Demonstration'.

I'm dishonorably discharging him. Into the cavern.

[Magistrum]

I'm dishonorably discharging him. Into the cavern.

That's nice and all, but what if he bring back the body of the last one?

[utunnels]

A mason died in their bedroom, blood drained.

I checked the human vampire diplomat, he was meeting with my duchess.

"Nobel dwarf, there is much to talk."
"NO! You know this means WAR! NOW DIE!"

I sent my squads. The vampire saw and ran for his life, leaving his two body guards behind.

My swordsdwarf dueled the human swordman, cut off some libs and decapitated him.

 My duchess and my manager were both legendary marksdwarves, they opened fire on the human crossbowman and then retreated. The hammer lord came and finished off the human crossbowman. The final blow jammed his war hammer in the brain(ouch).

The vampire ran into a dead end. He saw his mistake and tried to double back, but was cornered by my militia captain(legendary+5 miner). The miner chopped off an arm, bashed some teeth and gut the vampire. The vampire didn't die, he got past the attacker and ran towards the entrance. But unfortunately, another ex-legendary+5-miner came. Together, the miners bashed the vampire with their adamantine picks. Eventually, the captain chopped off a leg and the vampire died in the blood soaked corridor.

So what's next? A human siege?

[Magistrum]

So what's next? A human siege?

Meh, I think you'll have to kill another diplomat, because no one survived to tell the history to the humans...

[Aslandus]

So what's next? A human siege?

Next you wash the blood into your cistern for extra !!FUN!!