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[PDF urist master]

I made a new fort in a region that's half savage wasteland and half terrifying glacier. Wasn't as exciting as I hoped since there is no undead and no clouds (yet)

also for some reason, there's giant thrips everywhere. HOW THE FUCK are there giant thrips here when the land is fucking freezing?

The Giant thrips turned out to be a blessing in disguise. A yeti corpse showed up and got distracted by the giant thrips, giving me enough time to seal the fort.

[than402]

Greetings from the People's Tyrannic Republic Of Solonatek,aka Flagbore.I,than402,insane dicato...err Beloved and Revered Overseer and First Citizen of Solonatek,shall now write the most important events of the last year:

Military

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Last year,i lost two steel clad legendary soldiers on a goblin siege.They fell heroically after stupidly charging alone at,like,two units of macegoblins.Their carnage shall be greatly missed,their brains...not so much

Economy

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I found a way to sell captured orcs and goblins(i gave them the PET_EXOTIC tag and a PET_VALUE,and removed the EVIL tag),as well as gray langure and dingo people,which i succesfully enslave,err civilized.So i found myself going from bargaining my last bone crafts with particularly obnoxious humans to being flooded with superior quality,gem encrusted imported equipment almost overnight.Some may call this slave trade.I call it "relocation and rehabilitation of dangerous raiders through honest work".

Oh,i also mined some adamantine(rumors that i left for dead eight miners and a baby when they accidentally ran into lava are lies fabricated by enemies of the state.These miners never existed,with evidence being the total lack of memorials or graves.Their so-called families are just delusional.Their ghosts lie too).I am currently training some dwarves not to suck in armorsmithing,and then i'm gonna make some breastplates and helms,make some lucky comrades extra crunchy

Politics

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I got my second goblin mayor in the history of the fort this year.These goblins are the descendants of the goblins that first raided my fort and got caught.They are fully enslav...civilized and even have their own quarters in the level of the fortress where i keep most of the prisoners along with the animals i try to domesticate.The quarters are quite small and crowded and the goblins are not allowed out of them,plus they share them with some orcs(similar story,but they have not taken an active interest in politics yet).but they are allowed to live freely and without persecution,provided that they give in most of their newborn as a tribute.We,the people of Solonatek,accept the members of each race among us as equals.Even these filthy,murderous barbarians.Like her predecessor,the mayor is quite awesome.She does not make ridiculous demands,does not need extra stuff and space,and nobody will mind if some "accident" ever happens to her.

Sports

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

After several years,the Goblin Games will start again next year!!!That's essentially me pitting naked prisoners against wild beasts and making them run through corridors filled with traps.Sadly,they refuse to fight each otherand i have yet to find a suffecient motive...yet.Sure,they have a mortality rate of up to 90% with unlimited horrible and humiliating ways to die,but the winners are guaranteed not to sol...relocated, or be used as an emergency food source,so they have lots and lots of volunteers,which were never tortured and browbeaten beforehand and enter on their own free will.This year's theme shall be...Bears Are Bad News,starring grizzly bears and blind cave bears,and dwarves singing The Bear And The Maiden Fair.Well,at least i'll let them take wooden swords.

Culture

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

My latest project,the Graveyard For Dwarves Who Actually Do Not Suck And So Deserve An Actual Burial And Not Just Being Stuffed Into Some Box And Tossed In The Ground(still working on the name),is finished.Each dwarf buried there is entitled to a stack of gold coins,two statues from precious metal,a door from precious metal,a coffin from precious metal(noticed a pattern,yet?),engraved floors and walls,and some deadly traps to deter future grave robbers and murderhobos...erhm,sorry "Heroic Adventurers,clearing a dungeon of dangerous monsters inhabiting it". Obviously,no noblemen will be allowed,but the aforementioned goblin mayors might be...

My other latest project,the Most Definitely Not Evil Temple To Armok,still lies in the deepest,darkest,filthiest layer of the Development Hell for now.When it is finished,it will include ridiculously expensive statues,iron seats,engravings on the floor,badass cave dragons,and seasonal sacrifices of goblins,orcs,dwarves,trolls,humans and elves by feeding them to the cave dragons or throwing them in magma(when i figure how to move the magma,like,100 levels upstairs).

Other news

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Things are going quite smoothly in the rest of my fort.Due to me giving PET_EXOTIC to humans and elves,i now have a small but thriving human community living inside my fort.They are descended from the diplomats they send me and their bodyguards,and are currently in the third generation.They even helped me kill a Forgotten Beast which somehow managed to sneak into my dining room(the government refuses every accusation of ever having a blatant gap in the defense from below and endagering civilian lives),and they killed it without me even taking notice(OOC,i still don't know how did it do that,the cavern are walled off and my main gate extremely well guarded). However, a maceman has taken a liking in beating down my prisoners as i move the from cage to cage.Unfortunate as it is, i respect the (admittedly weird and rude) customs of their civilization,and if in the next months this particular human and/or his immediate family,friends and little dog suffer an unfortunate,magma related accident in will have nothing to do with that.Honestly.

Also,i just placed a table and a chair to the room of every dwarf in my fort in an effort to stop overcrowding in the dining room and therefore improve my fps.Works great so far.

The free people of Solonatek bid you and your stout dwarves farewell,and wish you good luck in your endeavors.

[Eidre]

Glovedcrests, year 136.
The ocean trapping chamber, long ineffective, finally snared a pod of four orcas.  After lugging one of the cages next to a pasture, Urist McWhaleLifter dragged the orca out...and it promptly hopped/slithered/flopped five tiles along the floor through the butcher shop and into the tannery before air-drowning.

Wait a minute...

Aren't orcas air-breathing mammals?

[Fluoman]

I was trying to use the coins-to-bars melting exploit on 8 different metals when suddenly, necromancer attack.
Of course, i have no more than 40 dwarves and a gazillion hauling jobs, with a Trade Depot located outside. Very clever.

[the1337doofus]

Glovedcrests, year 136.
The ocean trapping chamber, long ineffective, finally snared a pod of four orcas.  After lugging one of the cages next to a pasture, Urist McWhaleLifter dragged the orca out...and it promptly hopped/slithered/flopped five tiles along the floor through the butcher shop and into the tannery before air-drowning.

Wait a minute...

Aren't orcas air-breathing mammals?

Technically yes, but they can't survive on land due to the pressure on their bodies, like all whales.

[Sutremaine]

In-game, there's only one way of handling creatures that need an aquatic environment, and it's more suited to fish. Aquatic creatures that rely on lungs rather than gills should last longer than a fish out of water but there's no token for 'dies slowly when out of water', or any adjustable timer for air death.

While there's a real-life reason for whales to die when out of water, in-game it's because all aquatic creatures are simulated the same way and the simulation doesn't quite work for whales.

If Toady ever allows creature requests again, I'd like to nominate the walking catfish. It could survive indefinitely given access to cool wet tiles and some water to 'bathe' in, and die quicker and quicker as the tiles get drier and warmer.

[Starweaver396]

If Toady ever allows creature requests again, I'd like to nominate the walking catfish. It could survive indefinitely given access to cool wet tiles and some water to 'bathe' in, and die quicker and quicker as the tiles get drier and warmer.

I thought that was what the Lungfish were for? The outside of my fort keeps spawning them ever since I flooded it.

[smjjames]

If Toady ever allows creature requests again, I'd like to nominate the walking catfish. It could survive indefinitely given access to cool wet tiles and some water to 'bathe' in, and die quicker and quicker as the tiles get drier and warmer.

I thought that was what the Lungfish were for? The outside of my fort keeps spawning them ever since I flooded it.

The difference is that Lungfish are tagged as vermin, but they aren't restricted to water.

[Astrid]

Third year of existance of the Fort Horrorbloods.
It's slowly making its name count following the kill list.

My Blacksmith went Posessed today and created a weapon. A Battleaxe... Hooray something useful!

...made out of tin, rubberwood and spider silk...

...are...you...fracking....kidding...me...?

Do you want to tickle the Trolls to death???

[Astrid]

///connectionfart, pelase delete

[smjjames]

Third year of existance of the Fort Horrorbloods.
It's slowly making its name count following the kill list.

My Blacksmith went Posessed today and created a weapon. A Battleaxe... Hooray something useful!

...made out of tin, rubberwood and spider silk...

...are...you...fracking....kidding...me...?

Do you want to tickle the Trolls to death???

Also sucks that you got a possession mood, unless you didn't want that particular dwarf to be a weaponsmith.

Stick it into a weapon trap (or a display case thing if you have one) in your dining room to give it a nice value boost.

[Astrid]

That's the only option i have for it anyway. Though i could put it into a single tile room as a repeat
weapon and see how long it needs to get rid of 'unwanted personell'.
We'll see. *g*

[PDF urist master]

A forgotten beast just entered my fortress through hell. didn't know it could do that.

[Eidre]

In-game, there's only one way of handling creatures that need an aquatic environment, and it's more suited to fish. Aquatic creatures that rely on lungs rather than gills should last longer than a fish out of water but there's no token for 'dies slowly when out of water', or any adjustable timer for air death.

While there's a real-life reason for whales to die when out of water, in-game it's because all aquatic creatures are simulated the same way and the simulation doesn't quite work for whales.

I figure this is unlikely to be corrected because it raises unconfortable questions about the validity of equally large or larger creatures wandering around made of equivalent or less sounds stuff (giants, forgotten beasts made of ash and snow, etc) that don't collapse or suffocate under their own weight.

[smjjames]

In-game, there's only one way of handling creatures that need an aquatic environment, and it's more suited to fish. Aquatic creatures that rely on lungs rather than gills should last longer than a fish out of water but there's no token for 'dies slowly when out of water', or any adjustable timer for air death.

While there's a real-life reason for whales to die when out of water, in-game it's because all aquatic creatures are simulated the same way and the simulation doesn't quite work for whales.

I figure this is unlikely to be corrected because it raises unconfortable questions about the validity of equally large or larger creatures wandering around made of equivalent or less sounds stuff (giants, forgotten beasts made of ash and snow, etc) that don't collapse or suffocate under their own weight.

Those could be handwaved away with one word, magic. Then again, magic doesn't keep them from suiciding in a web or collapsing if you so much as sneeze at them.