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[Bludulukus]

Fortressbowel, pop 219, year 17

Lam Godlyslithered the great amber quadruped that spits webs is finally killed, after a 1 month standoff with most of the military stuck in webs. Sadly 3 dwarves lost their lives in the attack.

Improvements to the fort entrance are underway including the removal of excessive cage traps and the building of several ballista and more weapon traps fitted with copper serrated discs.

The dwarf Goden Helmwheel, once a skilled speardwarf but left a useless cripple with a shattered spine after a battle with a giant tick has been locked up in her room to die, to prevent her from continuously using up all my soap to clean her ever oozing back wound. A nice mausoleum is already prepared for her.

The bookkeeper that has been in the job for over 15 years and is still at ''Novice Record Keeper'' has finally been replaced, with his successor being equally useless at the job despite having perfectly functional offices and no other jobs enabled.

[FritzPL]

@up Make sure that in nobles screen, in settings on bookkeeper you selected 'all counts accurate'

[GrimDark_Majyyks]

The Spread Armor's caravan has just arrived at their destination of Palaceblades!



FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

EDIT: Turns out the worst part of it was that it immediately started raining and my dwarves were on the evil-biome half of the map. It had syndrome bluh bluh

[MisterMoxxie]

Just starting a new fort. Genning a name for the fortress and got "Kabgeshud, Namedfortress".

[Dryngar]

Humidfigure, year 6

Lost my siege engineer to an unfortunate incident. He was surprised by a Giant Tick while fishing - the tick bit off both his hands. As I was distracted by other matters, I noticed too late that he was stranded on the other side of the stream - apparently you can't swim without hands.

I hastily constructed a bridge, but he died of dehydration before he could reach the booze stockpile.

The dwarves later hunted down the tick and feasted on it.

[PDF urist master]

degducim is still seeing no invaders. the closest we got this year was a kobold thief, whom escaped with nothing.

the bright side is, with all these escapes, maybe i can get a kobold ambush out of it.

[Agent of Avarice]

I recently sent a few goblin hordes into my meat grinder maze (fps drops to 15 every time I open it up) Now I'm melting all the goblinite and wondering how to dispose of 500 McGoblin's Left Back Tooth.

[Gamerlord]

Magma obviously.

[Splint]

Or atom smashers. Those work too.

[Akura]

Damn. One of the injured military dwarves died of thirst in the hospital. What made it worse was her 2-year old daughter standing there, who also was the only member of their family there. (Probably worse still was the fact that the hospital bed was being shared with 3-4 other dwarves for some reason)

It was as if she was staying by her mother's side, watching her die because the medical staff was overwhelmed(read: lazy motherf*ckers) and couldn't take care of her, just so someone could at least comfort the dying mother.

...And with my luck, it was probably only a minor injury that could have just been left alone . Had more than a few of those in the hospital.


And prior to that, an injured axedwarf was lying at the edge of the map(broken foot) awaiting rescue when a minotaur showed up close by. The minotaur quickly went for the axedwarf, who decided he wasn't going down without a fight. He managed cut off one of the minotaur's legs, but then the minotaur snapped his axe-arm, and then broke his upper spine. Before the minotaur could finish off the axedwarf, the minotaur have into pain, and then a marksdwarf and several war turkeys showed up. The marksdwarf was fairly ineffective, but the turkeys jumped on him started biting the minotaur in the neck. Although not doing any damage, the turkeys kept the minotaur pinned down while the rest of the doomed axedwarf's squad and more marksdwarves showed up and finished off the minotaur. Poor guy finally suffocated while they were carrying him back, a well-deserved hero's parade.

[VerdantSF]

It was as if she was staying by her mother's side, watching her die because the medical staff was overwhelmed(read: lazy motherf*ckers) and couldn't take care of her, just so someone could at least comfort the dying mother.

Oh man, that sucks!  Did the medics have all non-hospital labors shut off?  I almost had a dwarf die of thirst because the medics apparently thought shuffling stones around was more important.  That's odd re: the bed pile-up happening.  I've never seen that before.  Were all the other beds in the hospital full?

And prior to that, an injured axedwarf was lying at the edge of the map(broken foot) awaiting rescue when a minotaur showed up close by. The minotaur quickly went for the axedwarf, who decided he wasn't going down without a fight.

Glad he got some hits in!  War turkeys, eh?  A flock of them pinning down a minotaur, that's awesome!

[krenshala]

I recently sent a few goblin hordes into my meat grinder maze (fps drops to 15 every time I open it up) Now I'm melting all the goblinite and wondering how to dispose of 500 McGoblin's Left Back Tooth.

Can't you use those to encrust stuff?

[VerdantSF]

They're really that strong .

Grats on 30000th post in this thread!

Woot!  Does this mean I get free dwarf syrup roasts for life ?

***

Relicshield, pop. 133, Spring of 321 (Year 70)

The Mountainhome has been at war with the Tattooed Confederacy for the past 2 years.  Even with their warhorses, the human forces have been decimated each time.  Dishmab Vesselbrain, wielder of Drumseer, successfully chased down several mounted humans, her lead mace quickly sending them to the boneyard.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

There was a huge upswing in the number of marriages once the memorial to Sphalerite, Edem II, and Tirist was opened.  With the tales of valor engraved on the tastefully arranged slabs, it quickly became a popular venue for marriage proposals.  The memorial also led to a shake-up of the political landscape.

Edem II's widow, Solon II Claspletter, rode a wave of sympathy and was voted in as mayor soon after her husband's death.  However, the former mayor, Olon II Treerooms, staged a comeback during the next term and regained his seat.  This started a cycle of razor thin voter margins and trading places as mayor, until a third party candidate, Dumat Neutraloiled defeated both in the most recent election.   

The Deep Forge has been a success, processing goblinite and satisfying the frequent demands of King Urist Shootwondered with ease.  The second cavern, while not yet completely walled off, remains under the watchful eyes of six dragon hatchling guardians. 

There has been trouble in the Dragon Den.  For the past several years, Ibmat's eggs have failed to hatch. The dragon had become increasingly restless of late, reverting to semi-wild just after being placed in a cage as a precaution.  She went completely wild soon after, but Meng Roughwhips, now a legendary animal trainer, quickly got her back under control.  Luckily, a second adult female dragon, Mistrum Brandjade, was captured recently.

Urdim Channeltree, the Captain of the Guard, has kept the fortress's justice system running smoothly.  Carrying on the family tradition, his son, the legendary soldier Urdim II, was recently promoted to Hammerer.

[PDF urist master]

THANK YOU!

my mayor cheered up my weaponsmith, whom recently overcame the tragedy of art defacement. i find this hilarious because this happened exactly when my other weaponsmith also received art defacement, but the other guy didn't give a shit.

FOR ONCE my mayor isn't a useless leech who just orders bucklers. (even though that's not our main export)

[VerdantSF]

Nice!  I used to think mayors were useless, too, until one provided emergency counseling services for a dwarf traumatized by lack of clothing from a burrow mix-up.