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Author Topic: What's going on in your fort?  (Read 6217167 times)

Vehudur

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20160 on: February 29, 2012, 09:48:59 am »

Accidentally built a logic gate as a NAND gate instead of an OR gate and !!FUN!! resulted in the form of large quantities of pressurized lava from my lava trap pouring backwards into my fortress.
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Quote
...and a third died in his bunk of natural causes - for a dagger in the heart quite naturally ends one's life.

I used to have an avatar, but I was told to remove it after it kept making people go insane.

Will_Tuna

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20161 on: February 29, 2012, 10:53:40 am »

Reanimated dog corpse on top of a tree that is unreachable :'(. my milly's cant attack it.

and the head is in line of sight with my inside fortress entrance, and 20 dwarves or so can't go back in the fortress :'(


Im under siege by the local tower, with 4 or 5 resident necromancers, somehow they keep hiding and i cannot find them :'(

I feel doom is upon us!

no more evil region with aquifier next to tower for me
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True story: In the year 2007: Surinder Singh Bajwa, the Deputy Mayor of Delhi, India, was warding off several Rhesus Macaque monkeys at his home and fell from a first-floor balcony, suffering serious head injuries. He later died from his injuries.

Sus

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20162 on: February 29, 2012, 11:00:10 am »

Reanimated dog corpse on top of a tree that is unreachable :'(. my milly's cant attack it.

and the head is in line of sight with my inside fortress entrance, and 20 dwarves or so can't go back in the fortress :'(


Im under siege by the local tower, with 4 or 5 resident necromancers, somehow they keep hiding and i cannot find them :'(

I feel doom is upon us!

no more evil region with aquifier next to tower for me
I say drop a floor on him.
If you can, build a tall tower with a 1-wide floor "pier" reaching over the zomdog --> deconstruct 2nd last tile of floor --> last tile lands on zomdog --> problem = solved.
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Certainly you could argue that DF is a lot like The Sims, only... you know... with more vomit and decapitation.
If you launch a wooden mine cart towards the ocean at a sufficient speed, you can have your entire dwarf sail away in an ark.

Maggarg - Eater of chicke

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20163 on: February 29, 2012, 11:53:11 am »

I'm just constructing a wretched town for migrants only above ground at the moment. I'm only allowing the first 21 dwarves access to my main fortress - the migrants afterwards are to be detained in an aboveground cell until they die of something - once all of them have starved to death in the prison, it will be opened and their corpses buried in a muddy hollow under the building.

none will be permitted to live
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...I keep searching for my family's raw files, for modding them.

Di

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20164 on: February 29, 2012, 01:16:30 pm »

Something tells me I'm going to feel awful a little while later.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Quote from: Creamcorn
Dwarf Fortress: Where you meet the limit of your imagination, moral compass, sanity and CPU processor.
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=103080.0 Fix sober vampires!
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=91442.0 Dwarven Cognitive Science

Clover Magic

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20165 on: February 29, 2012, 02:07:58 pm »

Edit: She's gone for the adamantine.  If this results in a warhammer...

Edit 2: "This is an adamantine war hammer.  All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality.  This object menaces with spikes of light yellow diamond.  On the item is an image of rope reed in adamantine."

Fuck you.  At least it was fey so she's legendary now, or else this would have resulted in magma.  I guess when I get justice running my hammerer will have an awesome wiffle bat.

Why the admantine AND one of my diamonds?  Really?  :/

You can save scum artifacts too.  So if they run off to make a weapon and you don't like what they make you can save scum until they make an axe or something.

I know this.  I prefer my artifacts to be authentic, so wiffle bat it is.  :P

Speaking of, I have it set up in glorious display in a weapon trap in the meeting hall.  Look on the trap and wonder, dwarves!

A pair of my starting miners got married, yay!  Happy dwarves.

I have hilariously discovered that I have no need for a meat industry.  Wandering zombies get caught in my weapon traps, die, and my butcher hauls them off to be butchered.  No matter how long they might have been undead previously, as long as he can glean some bones from it, he butchers it.  This is hilariously awesome, as it means I have no need for hunters or to butcher my own animals beyond population control.

Also related to pets, damn but do I love Toady for pastures.  Efficient cat AND pet control in one!  Pasture your cats over your food pastures and your pets into some out of the way room/grazing area and never worry about cats dragging gobbos to your fortress or military freaking out about dead pets ever again!  Sweeeet.  Also saves FPS problems as the cats do not path anywhere except to vermin that appear in their pasture.  I love this feature so much.
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Uthric

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20166 on: February 29, 2012, 02:26:50 pm »



Also related to pets, damn but do I love Toady for pastures.  Efficient cat AND pet control in one!  Pasture your cats over your food pastures and your pets into some out of the way room/grazing area and never worry about cats dragging gobbos to your fortress or military freaking out about dead pets ever again!  Sweeeet.  Also saves FPS problems as the cats do not path anywhere except to vermin that appear in their pasture.  I love this feature so much.


clearly a bug.
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Will_Tuna

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20167 on: February 29, 2012, 02:48:08 pm »

Being attacked by Giant Bushtit :o
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True story: In the year 2007: Surinder Singh Bajwa, the Deputy Mayor of Delhi, India, was warding off several Rhesus Macaque monkeys at his home and fell from a first-floor balcony, suffering serious head injuries. He later died from his injuries.

Loud Whispers

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20168 on: February 29, 2012, 03:36:18 pm »

Being attacked by Giant Bushtit :o



Oh hai

martinuzz

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20169 on: February 29, 2012, 03:42:28 pm »


Also related to pets, damn but do I love Toady for pastures.  Efficient cat AND pet control in one!  Pasture your cats over your food pastures and your pets into some out of the way room/grazing area and never worry about cats dragging gobbos to your fortress or military freaking out about dead pets ever again!  Sweeeet.  Also saves FPS problems as the cats do not path anywhere except to vermin that appear in their pasture.  I love this feature so much.

And don't forget they allow strategic use of wardogs on entrance bottlenecks. And more importantly puppy-powered ambush detection stations around your fort
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

nightwhips

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20170 on: February 29, 2012, 04:58:35 pm »

Being attacked by Giant Bushtit :o



Oh hai

More specifically:



For realism, they should be modded to occur in groups of 20-30.
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: Miner dwarves? In my volcano?

:I put childs into danger room...
They die, and their parents care nothing because legendary dining room.

Karlito

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20171 on: February 29, 2012, 05:34:38 pm »

I didn't know they could even count that high:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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This sentence contains exactly threee erors.

Clover Magic

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20172 on: February 29, 2012, 06:03:49 pm »

I didn't know they could even count that high:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Trillion cut gems:
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NonconsensualSurgery

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20173 on: February 29, 2012, 06:10:11 pm »

I'm running a moderately successful facility that is setting up for some zombie/husk/werewolf science when two employees arrive from a previous Umbrella research station that suffered an unfortunate biohazard release and had to be shut down. They were both battle-scarred combat miners, and probably the only two employees to witness even a fraction of the the horrors of the Laboratory 6 incident and make it out alive. Curiously, a romantic relationship was noted between the two despite the recent death and zombification of the male's lover. Stress forges strong bonds.

Umbrella Corporation welcomes those who choose to renew their contract at another facility. They were scanned for contamination, given a clean bill of health and admitted to Laboratory 7 to serve the remainder of their contract as mining personnel. In hindsight, quarantine procedures should have been employed anyway. This overseer recommends quarantine become standard procedure for all employees showing any kind of agitation upon arrival.

One employee, the male, began to show doubts about the Umbrella Corporation mission statement upon arrival and an inability to control his hostility, which manifested as provoking fights in the mess hall and taking pleasure in throwing random items. With time, he suffered a psychotic break and turned against the Corporation despite my best efforts to placate him with expensive furniture and a private suite.

Security personnel casualties were... significant as the battle-hardened one man army attempted to fight his way from the meeting hall in the general direction of the surface, ranting about the injustices perpetrated by Umbrella - the usual drivel we get from dissenters and liberals, you know. Nearly a dozen employees were permanently disabled or killed before our chief of security managed to subdue him with a fireaxe. One of our top scientists, a metallurgist, was also killed during the rampage.

The female is remarkably mentally stable despite the extreme violence she's witnessed and the insanity of her lover. We recommend her for promotion to a management position.

Fortunately, the rogue employee died in a region free of biohazards - had he crawled into one of the tunnels leading to the infected zone and been exposed, it could have been Laboratory 6 all over again. Requesting additional security personnel and a new metallurgical specialist.
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Never had a bat massacre people with an axe before.
EDIT2: Oh god, the bat has got a title now.

Stoup

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #20174 on: February 29, 2012, 08:09:21 pm »

Ohhhh shit. I'm at the dawn of a tantrum spiral, I just know it. 12 members of my fortress, 11 of which (!!) are in my military, and one of which is a child, are all slowly suffocating to death in my hospital due to deadly dust from a mud FB that appeared in my caverns. In retrospect I should have sent my royal guard that's armed with wooden spears to dispatch it, but as it stands I sent in my most elite military dwarves, all of which are legendary in fighting at least. Many of them are also legendary in their respective weapon skills...

And many of them are married. One of them was one of my final remaining starting 7, which leaves Ralsakzul down to only two of its original founders. Another one is married to the captain of the guard (who is corpulent and not combat effective). Yet another has 3 kids, and his father is a local legendary bone carver by the name of Urdim.

All of these people were Silvertrumpet's finest, legendary warriors who have never known defeat, and now die slowly at the hands of a swiftly dispatched creature of filth.

Current dwarf count: 111. LET THE DEATHS COMMENCE!

Edit: I still have not unpaused the game, and have discovered 3 more legendary military dwarves having seizures in the barracks. This leaves the total casualties at 15 inevitable, all from a single beast.
« Last Edit: February 29, 2012, 08:37:42 pm by Stoup »
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