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[Niccolo]

Currently have a little bear issue at my main stockpile. Damn thing keeps thieving my wine, but since I have all of the military power of a glass of water I'm just letting it get drunk off it's ass. It'll eventually get bored... or I'll catch it and sell it to the Elves.

They like bears, right?

[FrisianDude]

I just gave orders to slaughter seventeen puppies because my framerate is a bit high.

[monk12]

Currently have a little bear issue at my main stockpile. Damn thing keeps thieving my wine, but since I have all of the military power of a glass of water I'm just letting it get drunk off it's ass. It'll eventually get bored... or I'll catch it and sell it to the Elves.

They like bears, right?

Are they grizzly bears? Because you can war-train those. Nothing says "Dwarven Military Might" quite like a grizzly bear drunk off its ass.

[Dr. Hieronymous Alloy]

I just gave orders to slaughter seventeen puppies because my framerate is a bit high.

The one time I've made my wife break down laughing over dwarf fortress was the time I said, out loud, apparently appropos of nothing, "Well, guess I can't make an omelette without slaughtering a couple dozen puppies."

For context, I'm a huge dog lover, whereas she's sort of dog-neutral, so that added to the comedic effect.

[FrisianDude]

The one time I've made my wife break down laughing over dwarf fortress was the time I said, out loud, apparently appropos of nothing, "Well, guess I can't make an omelette without slaughtering a couple dozen puppies."

For context, I'm a huge dog lover, whereas she's sort of dog-neutral, so that added to the comedic effect.

Nice.

Are they grizzly bears? Because you can war-train those. Nothing says "Dwarven Military Might" quite like a grizzly bear drunk off its ass.

As far as I know you need to mod to be able to tame grizzlies. I thought only black bears were tameable without modding.

[wypie]

Sucking at DF and drowning kittens in magma

[monk12]

Are they grizzly bears? Because you can war-train those. Nothing says "Dwarven Military Might" quite like a grizzly bear drunk off its ass.

As far as I know you need to mod to be able to tame grizzlies. I thought only black bears were tameable without modding.

Nope, it's the other way around. Which is good, since Grizzlies are bigger and (in my experience) more common. The fact you don't need a dungeon master to tame them is just icing on the cake.

[Sinlessraptor]

A berserk weaver who I trapped in a corridor, has just given birth.

She prompted to then hack the baby to death with a copper battleaxe.

[FrisianDude]

Are they grizzly bears? Because you can war-train those. Nothing says "Dwarven Military Might" quite like a grizzly bear drunk off its ass.

As far as I know you need to mod to be able to tame grizzlies. I thought only black bears were tameable without modding.

Nope, it's the other way around. Which is good, since Grizzlies are bigger and (in my experience) more common. The fact you don't need a dungeon master to tame them is just icing on the cake.

Alright.

[monk12]

Drunkensteels has produced its first artifact!

Famineashamed, a limestone bracelet. It is encrusted with limestone and decorated with horse leather. It is adorned with hanging rings of limestone. On the item is an image of Nekol, the deity of suicide, depicted as a female dwarf. Nekol is withering away.

All in all, a rather distressing artifact, but since it is worth 10k dorfbucks I guess I'm content. In other artistic news, I had my metalsmith shake the rust off his Blacksmithing skill and make a dozen bronze statues for a planned statue garden. Most of them are of Beak Dogs killing dwarves, a couple of my carpenter making masterwork shields, and one of his favorite deity.

This is an exceptional bronze statue of Goral the Spicy Dessert of Oats, deity of food, depicted as a male dwarf and a dwarf in bronze. The dwarf is praying. Goral the Spicy Dessert of Oats is contemplating.

His name is oddly appropriate, although his flavor choices seems off. I think I'll put it in the kitchen.


Still no Beak Dogs 2 years into the reclaim- they're planning something, I can feel it.

[FrisianDude]

I just got a fairly stylish crown made solely of black zircon. Menacing with spikes of black zircon but that's okay because crowns should have spikes on top anyway.

[monk12]

With the autumnal caravan, the Beak Dogs returned to Drunkensteels.

All in all, my military performed admirably. A couple of raw, underequipped recruits got their arms mangled, and a captain nearly had his leg bit off, but nobody died and the entire pack was destroyed.

On the other side of the map, my miner suddenly caused a cave-in without my direct supervision and died, taking a random peasant with him. I'm still not entirely sure what happened there, but I do know that the miner was fairly popular (being one of the starting seven and lover of the Chief Medical Dwarf.) His death has put the fortress on the verge of a tantrum spiral, as the delicious assortment of booze in the kinda ok dining hall is being outweighed by the shock of dead friends. A milker who had the misfortune to be friends with both of the deceased went mad after a different ghost decided to haunt her, and is running around babbling. She has quite a few friends, and her death may put me over the edge.

And to top it off, the Goblins decided to ambush. One squad of Crossbows turned a wounded straggler from the Beak Dog fight into a pincushion. Their leader was a Pikeman, and he managed to keep the army from closing to melee with the archers- between the two of them half my military took wounds of one kind or another, some serious.

As the Pikeman fell and the crossbows turned to flee, another squad of Crossbows led by a Maceman decloaked off the left flank and sent a punishing fusillade of bolts into my already wounded, upset dwarves. A hammerdwarf caught a bolt to the helmet which knocked him unconscious, and was quickly pincushioned. An Axedwarf danced with the Macegoblin for a while, and just after he severed the goblins arm he took a bolt to the spine, and was (you guessed it) pincushioned. The captain of the Swordsdwarf squad led a charge against the goblin position, and took a pair of bolts to his stomach. Despite constant retching, he went on to cut down two goblins and send the rest packing before he collapsed on the ground.

All told, I no longer have the beds to hold the wounded (hospital construction has been moved way up the priority queue,) most of my dwarves are unhappy, and my announcements are being spammed by dwarves too injured to grab their weaponry. We're in for one wild winter.

[Ragingpantsless]

After digging out most of the land, I finally hit caverns. Sent a squad of swordslords through and much to my surprise, not only does my embark have a volcano, it also has a magma pool in the first cavern. Closing this place off has become my top priority. Don't want to lose the bet due to a random FB sneaking in. But just to make things interesting and fair I'll leave a few areas for them to get to my gold mines. The 'How will my fortress end' is still open for betting, winner getting 5 bucks worth of cookies.

[FrisianDude]

A while ago I lost a baby. The baby has come back to haunt her parents a bit and was then put to rest with a slab. The mother is now seeking infant.

[Weary Exile]

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