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[Naryar]

His ego is legendary as well !

[MarineMorton]

The screw press is annoying me I want to make mead and lots of it damn you!

[TolyK]

naming dwarves for lp (soon to be in sig). liason arrives. cats fall down my waterfall trap... XD ... goblins coming SOON due to me being at war with them.

this is gonna be fun...

EDIT: oh, and it's the first fall and I've already got a kobold and a goblin corpse. using .18 I think...?

[Beardless]

Four Giant Desert Scorpions arrived on my fortress site, wandered, woefully ignored my outside wooden door surrounded by cage traps, AND LEFT THE MAP. RAAAAAAAARGH ! Now my map has useless dralthas and camels on it. Not to mention the equally useless magma crabs who chill in my volcano. What am I going to do, stop the goblins with camels

Clearly, sir or madam, you have never fought camels before.

[Naryar]

Four Giant Desert Scorpions arrived on my fortress site, wandered, woefully ignored my outside wooden door surrounded by cage traps, AND LEFT THE MAP. RAAAAAAAARGH ! Now my map has useless dralthas and camels on it. Not to mention the equally useless magma crabs who chill in my volcano. What am I going to do, stop the goblins with camels

Clearly, sir or madam, you have never fought camels before.

Well they do seem to fall surprisingly easily to my hunters. And it's sir.

By the way, i have now 4 GDS. Breeding underway.

[Urist Da Vinci]

Just started a new fort. Guess what I see on the map right after embarking? Rhesus macaques. Oh crap...

[Flying Dice]

On a new embark. There is a massive dropoff on the northeast corner, a sinkhole which I plan to convert into a rubbish pit, a minor river running down the middle. Oh, and a large party of kobolds on the other bank. My militia commander went into a martial trance at first contact and killed their entire group inside 3 seconds, with the only injuries being the paws of two war dogs. I'm hoping that more will show up, as live-action training is great, and they've provided me with a nice bit of loot to melt down. Gotta love morons that use silver spears, eh?

[bobhayes]

Gotta love morons that use silver spears, eh?

Especially when they come to steal our -gabbro bracelets-.

I mean, dude. Just come trade. You're dying for rubbish.

[EveryZig]

ANOTHER stuck siege. This time, they hovered around on top of my greenhouse for a while (while my marksdwarf shot at them), but then they chased a goblin snatcher and never came back. They just stand around the corner of the map now being obnoxious...

[edit]: I sent my marksdwarf over there to shoot at them, and they just stand there...

[Flying Dice]

Well, the workshops have been carved out, and just in time. Some news:

Bad: First mood is a possession.

Good: I had the forethought to do my normal 1x1 stair down to the cotton candy, and had a few wafers on hand. After a hasty round of mass-forbidding, Urist McMoody picks up one of the wafers, along with another stone block. A bit later...

"Zan Tamoldoren, Weaponsmith has created Ashmonzon Enamdolok, aka Shadyhelms the Pure Obstacles, an adamantine spear encircled with bands of adamantine and adorned with hanging rings of granite!". Total value: 1.009mDB. And I just got a speardwarf in a recent migrant group. Guess who gets autopromoted to militia captain?

Also: River currently contains approx. ten million carp. The sinkhole will come in hand as soon as my canal and floodgate are finished. We will dine on our mortal foes! Note that this started because they killed a child foolish enough to drink from the river. I'm the only one who gets to visit terrible "accidents" on useless members of my population, dammit!

[Stone Wera]

I stopped a seige without military, regular traps, or magma.

Something like this.


      g g g g
==============
 b ----> I       
===\     =     
====\    =     
==============


Miners can be as dangerous under the battlefield as a soldier on the battlefield.

The g being a Goblin, I a support, b a lever, the arrow shows the connection to the support, the \ is a ramp, and the = is solid ground.

I apologize for the terrible attempt at an illustration.

[monk12]

Sharkblockade had a good defense set up, but an incomplete one. The moat was dug out, 3 sides of which had an alligator infested river in it. Three bridges gave access to the fortress, with loaded cage traps on both sides. A 1 tile wall was established, with designations for expansion in place.

Goblin snatchers flipped most of the cages on the north bridge, followed shortly by the decloaking of an ambush of crossbow goblins. The Shearer who discovered the ambush dodged the first barrage of bolts, but one of the second volley caught him in the face. Oh well, I thought, no great loss.

The goblins took up position on the bridge, a tile north of the remaining cage traps, and started filling my pasture with bolts. Many baby turkeys were slain. Great, I thought, I have a literal meatshield. I'll let them waste their bolts, then send the military to mop up.

The military took position just beneath the surface of the earth. One of the goblins eschewed his bolts in favor of bashing turkeys to death with his crossbow. Hilarious, I thought.

That's when the goblin entered the line of sight of one of the swordsdwarves. The swordsdwarf broke cover, completely failed to hit the goblin, and had his skull bashed in almost immediately. The goblin had dodged onto the ramp down, causing the rest of the military to abandon their post and chase him around. The militia commander, with his adamantine battleaxe, caught a bolt with his spine almost immediately. The captain of the other squad dodged one bolt only to be perforated by half a dozen more, and is lying bleeding in the dirt. Though leaderless, the other dwarves charged the bridge, inducing the other goblins to dodge into cage traps. One of the goblins in that action died on his feat- the other fell into the alligator filled river.

Goblins- 2 dead, 7 captured (including 3 thieves), one goblin trying desperately to swim away from the alligators and one thief made it off the map unscathed.

Dwarves- 2 dead, militia commander crippled, 4 others with serious wounds (3 if you don't consider a mangled hand serious), in 2 cases what turned out to be mortal wounds.

AUTMNAL AUTOSAVE!

[Jeoshua]

So I'm scouting a new location for a site, right?

I browse through the available civs and I see this one tiny dwarven civ with only 4 sites.  Curious, I open up LegendViewer, to see what's up with them and if this little civ is still alive or not.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The Contested Stake is a civlization of dwarves <-- "Okay, there they are"

Leaders
Kings
1.  1 the dwarf Ezum Whispersdike
2.  26 the dwarf Atir Whipeyes
3.  27 the dwarf Stukos Listenedmountain
4.  90 the dwarf Moldath Fortresspacked
5.  98 the dwarf Ingish Matchlashes
6.  100 the dwarf Kib Coalglen
7.  106 the dwarf Fikod Watchboulder
8.  188 the dwarf Zas Furnacesevere
9.  211 the dwarf Urist Obscureoil
10.  237 the dwarf Kosoth Goalpapers
11.  257 the dwarf Asen Minerhythmic  <- "Hmm, must be dead, this game is starting in 850..."

Worships

the dwarf Uzol Coppercanyon
the dwarf Arban
the dwarf Datan the Whiteness of Tin
the dwarf Bal the Vigorous Lizard-shin
the dwarf Onul the Witch of Demons
the imp fire Nelas Glowheat            <--- "They worshipped the fire imps.... I wonder..."
the dwarf Lebes
the dwarf Bokbon the Calm Meditations

Wars
1.  95 - Present The War of Incineration waged against The Play of Working    <-- "Sylvans... they won the war too."

Sites
1.   The Connected Channel founded Heldwheeled 1
2.   The Greater Work founded Wheelcrafts 1
3.   The Sabre of Excavating founded Pulleywhisper 4
4.   The Boats of Scorching founded Strapsroads 20

Populations  <--- "Wait, this is a dead civ, right? What kind of population could they have?"

10 Demons  <--- !!

Do you see what happened there?

Careful when you dig deep, boys and girls.  Nelas Glowheat the Scourge of The Contested Stake may have a surprise for you.

[monk12]

A baby turkey just pecked out the lung of another baby turkey. I think the recent battle gave them bloodlust.

[takaratiki]

Failure. I had only a couple of casualties, just a couple, during a successfully beaten back siege. So a few dwarves are uppity about their loss, big deal, I've seen worse. Only this time one downer dwarf leads to another and within a month it's full blown tantrum spiral time. Wee! After jailing failed to dissuade the others, after the public executions, after the berserk slaughter and the incident with the collapsing bridge into the river, I had enough. I designated a burrow across a river from my fort (the one with the functioning bridge), sent everyone except the military over, and decided to try a couple of rounds of "alert over, QUICK PULL THE LEVER!" to thin the herd, as if they needed more misery via the atom smasher.
Well, no need to worry about my half-baked schemes, a bonkers dwarf nuked the bridge before I could turn off the alert and just in time for a dwarf to go thermonuclear in the burrow which contained 60 cranky dwarves in a 3x6 area. Fun! I freed them from the burrow and let nature take its course. The first bonko-dwarf was fun, but the Architect! Wow, when he went nutso it was epic. Half of that festering sliver of hell across the river was his doing, I suppose all those years of building roads left some unresolved tension. Finally, a babbling miner drove a pick into his skull and put him out of his misery.
When all was said and done, there were 6 starving dwarves left across the way and 8 in the fort. Looking over the river massacre survivors, I see one who's not red exclamationed, with a baby to boot. The heck? Reviewing her state. I find out that she is ecstatic, even though her husband and all her friends were killed, even though shes witnessed enough rampant massacre to scramble everyone else's bean, even though she's lived off of vermin for a month, this mama is absolutely peachy. Kind of like the earth virgin in The Begotten, wandering the wasteland with her horror-spasming baby trailing behind her. I tell her to grab a pick and dig her way back to safety. She's obviously a keeper and the future of the fortress, if there is any.