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[doomdome]

I think my fort is officially screwed... A giant toad just wandered inside from the caverns, and my 12-dwarf military has been putting off actually training for the entire life of the fort... They don't even have armor, because nobody wants to operate the pump for my magma forge, after the first dwarf killed himself there.

[Schilcote]

I think my fort is officially screwed... A giant toad just wandered inside from the caverns, and my 12-dwarf military has been putting off actually training for the entire life of the fort... They don't even have armor, because nobody wants to operate the pump for my magma forge, after the first dwarf killed himself there.

Meh, just spam stone-fall traps until it dies. I always put stone-fall traps around the main staircase and whenever it diverts to avoid caverns. Whenever it connects to the cavern or a sensitive area, I also put in a few cage traps.

[RustyTheBrave]

Well the inevitable happened: My one prosperous fortress that had been running for about 20 in-game years without incident is rapidly descending into bloody madness. It started with an attempt to recover a few bodies from the well. This did not... Go well. The tendency for dwarves to try to run INTO a high-pressure water flow right next to a sizable drop is to blame for this, and the resultant deaths sparked the dreaded Spiral of Bloody Fun and Excitement.

I'm watching it to its conclusion, and quietly lamenting the loss of what was once an extremely prosperous holding.

[Internet Kraken]

I think my fort is officially screwed... A giant toad just wandered inside from the caverns, and my 12-dwarf military has been putting off actually training for the entire life of the fort... They don't even have armor, because nobody wants to operate the pump for my magma forge, after the first dwarf killed himself there.

The makeshift army of Townbrush consisted of a bunch of unarmored civilians ineffectively beating against Ogres until they eventually fell to their knees. If they managed to survive, I think you can take on the toad.

[Shurikane]

Dancefloor shall be henceforth known as Project Bloodriver.

I have prepared a small millitia which, despite no training, has managed to despite most skeletal fish on the premises.

Now to set up the roads and the outer walls on this side of the river to seal the way against invaders such that only a switch is required should I desire to bar the way to the goblins.  This is rather crucial and urgent, seeing as I know my militia will never be able to do anything substantial against goblins in their current state.

[Beardless]

Oh god. I just took a look at my mason's personality to see why she wasn't working on the thrones I've had queued up for weeks now. I uncovered no clues to that, but I did make a different, disturbing discovery.

Urdim Rīzenām likes limonite, sterling silver, morion and squares. When possible, she prefers to consume she, dwarven ale, and cave wheat seeds.

"Shellfish. She likes shellfish," I say to myself.

I wish I could believe it.

[Internet Kraken]

A vile force of darkness just arrived. This is the first siege I've ever encountered, but I'm not intimidated. It's a squad of about 20 goblin swordsman lead by a maceman riding a giant rat. I've faced larger numbers of goblins at once due to several simultaneous ambushes, and this time they lack crossbows. I'll just set the spike trap to repeat and if they get to close, I'll just retract the bridge.

I'm surprised this siege isn't being led by a Dwarf. All of the goblin ambushes have been led by Dwarves.

EDIT: The siege already left. The Goblins charged the interest, the maceman's rat was stabbed a few times, thought "fuck this shit", and turned around. 

EDIT 2: Ugh, the Darnen apparently decided to launch an ambush at the same time. Luckily a cage trap alerted me to their presence rather than a dwarf being stabbed in the chest.

EDIT 3: Oh dear lord. My military proved just how absolutely useless they were. They engaged the Darnen in combat, only to get their heads loped off nearly instantly. The Darnen then ran around the fortress decapitating everyone. So many dwarves died. There hasn't been a slaughter this bad since the Ogre attack many years before. The corpses are strewn throughout the fortress. Many lie dead on the surface, while others are rotting down in the tunnels. Fortunately, The Darnen became bored with the slaughter and flew away. The Fortress is now in chaos. Most of the Dwarves are absolutely miserable, and many are tantruming. The military presence in Townbrush has been reduced to one pathetic solider, who presumably survived because he was to pathetic to actually be attacked. So the majority of Townbrush's citizens are either weak, miserable, or crippled. I honestly don't know how much longer they can possibly survive. But I will continue on, simply to see how this all ends.

Townbrush Fun! fact: The Baroness was killed, meaning that the 7 insane dwarves that decided to build Townbrush have died. The dead also outnumber the living.

[FlamingCow]

Lost approximately half my militia over 5 years to the wooden spear training and military incidents, also noticed that Dump designations override Melt designations (And vice versa) which is very handy for seige residue clearing.

[timtek]

I honestly don't know how much longer they can possibly survive. But I will continue on, simply to see how this all ends.

Never give up, never surrender. Good luck!

[Internet Kraken]

I honestly don't know how much longer they can possibly survive. But I will continue on, simply to see how this all ends.

Never give up, never surrender. Good luck!

I really want to, but it's hard to continue when my fort looks like this;

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I don't know what that black crap on the depo is. I doubt I'd want to either. And all I have to clean up this mess is a bunch of tantruming dwarves.

EDIT:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 

[Beardless]

Discovered DF does not play well with my new Internet connection. I know, it shouldn't be an issue, but this is the one game I really can't play without access to documentation. Ah well, maybe reducing the priority to normal will help.

Making progress with encasing my central stair in clear glass now that I have full access to the underground. Plenty of coal, tower caps, and no more beds to make! Several interesting and/or scary creatures have wandered in, but they always seem to hang out on the other side of the lake, so things seem safe for now. Though it's probably only a matter of time before my psycho hunter decides that he should maim a cave crocodile before wandering off to have a drink. Seriously, he is an utter sadist. He has only one kill, but if there was a "maim list", his would be several pages long. He likes to fire a single bolt, wait for his victim to regain consciousness, and then chase it off the map without firing another shot. Sometimes he'll get bored while it's unconscious and fire a few more bolts at it, but never enough to do serious damage. And it's not because he's a bad shot either! The first shot always skewers internal organs. Always. And that's not even counting the normal dwarven behavior of getting bored half-way through the hunt and going off to eat/drink/be merrysleep. (And always choosing a new target when he decides to hunt again, even when his previous victim is bleeding out three squares away.)

...wow. That was an unexpected detour. (As you can see, this dwarf kind of scares me.)

(Edit:) And now I've thoroughly freaked myself out by speculating about the possibility of Psycho Hunter marrying Self-Cannibalistic Mason. I... may not go to sleep tonight.

[Eric Blank]

...wow. That was an unexpected detour. (As you can see, this dwarf kind of scares me.)

(Edit:) And now I've thoroughly freaked myself out by speculating about the possibility of Psycho Hunter marrying Self-Cannibalistic Mason. I... may not go to sleep tonight.

If you do, you can rest peacefully, assured that I will suffer from no such problems.

The past (dwarven) year and a half has been rather boring for me, the vast majority of it was my lazily setting up infrastructure and digging my central staircase several levels deeper. There's nothing really to do but suspend/unsuspend the brewing labor every 6 months, cage all the animals being born, and watch a bunch of midgets run around being !!F$%^#&* ECSTATIC!!, besides the recruit, who is still a recruit and still sobbing all the time. Not even a single death, accident, or halfway-interesting artifact. Still debating whether I should have the dining room engraved, I really want it to be done by a legendary(or at least more than competent) engraver, of which I possess none.

[Derekristow]

I have a squad chasing an elk bird around my dining room Benny Hill style.  Still don't know how it snuck in.

[Absentia]

I'm working on my dwarven beachfront high-rise condo: 8 bedrooms per floor, 10 floors (set the pop cap at 80 to combat lag), built above ground with a view of a serene tropical ocean, clear glass windows to be added later. And as if it weren't a perfect enough vacation spot: no elves! I'm thinking about putting in a pool as well. What would be the dwarf equivalent of tennis courts?

[Medicine Man]

I'm working on a self destruct lever.