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[Buttery_Mess]

I'm trying to build an execution device that use magma mist to kill all the goblins that i captured from the last siege. I've already tried to build it five times. I failed...

PS: I'm starting to think that Dwarf fortress is some kind of tool created by the devil to make us be unprepared to the end of the world becuse we were playing and posting in the forum (page number=666)

That's quite a conclusion to draw from such a limited set of data.

[Mechatronic]

I've got the military training thing sorted. Embarking with four dwarves, each a proficient teacher with individuals being proficient in axe, shield user, armour user and dodging I had legendary axedwarves after a year. I drafted an early migrant with some military skills, so a squad of five. Fifteen elves ambush with a grizzly bear, my dwarves at this stage have copper axes and leather armour, the military commander also wears a fetching leather helm, and all but three elves were slaughtered with only a horse taking some injuries.

The next year I didn't receive any migrants (I guess because of the war with the elves?) and I liked just having 17 dwarfs to deal with. Now a massive spring migrant wave...

[Korva]

My current first got turned into a barony, my very first ever, after I used the "keep the mayor from talking to the diplomat till the caravan has left" trick. My mayor-turned-baroness is one of my founders as well as my broker and mechanic, and very easy to please. So far so good!

Now it's the spring of the following year -- AND THE QUEEN HAS JUST ARRIVED!  I thought you could ASK for the monarch to relocate to the fort, not that it happened automatically. I'm completely and utterly unprepared for this. Crap on a stick. Engage panic mode!

I saved immediately so I wouldn't do anything stupid while I'm still caught between laughing and swearing. Most of my miners are legendary, so it should not take long to dig out acceptable accommodations. I have two legendary blacksmiths and lots of precious ore/metal for furniture. Hopefully I'll be able to whip something up in time to prevent Her Royal Highness from throwing a royal fit.

[Crazy Cow]

I built an execution pit that consisted of three bridges that would drop a creature into the fiery pits of hell. The lag killed the fort before the demons did, but it was fun to drop a dragon down and watch the demons burn.
It is also page 666 in this topic.

[TolyK]

Because of this I breached hell in an alternate version of my fort.

186 demons. made of snow, ice, and fire. the fire ones survived. all 3 of them.

and then my militia ... well they can party all they want.
****























*****
... as ghosts. 

#####
I started a new fort. Evidently at war with goblins. Not the red lines, but WAR.
Fuck. Well I'm walling in and making a moat.

Pre-Post edit: HOLY SHIT I HAVE CUBIC SHITLOADS OF CHALK, MAGNETITE, AND COAL!!!! FUCK YEAH!!!! AND IT HAS A WATERFALL AND 5 RIVERS!!! AND THIS IS EPIC!!!

[Akura]

I chained up 2 war elephants a war dog at my entrance, if the snatchers/thieves don't get trampled flat when they are found they probably won't have the guts to go any farther.

Well, even if they got trampled, they still wouldn't have the guts to go any farther.

[JacenHanLovesLegos]

...and I've just discovered a "curious underground structure" peopled with undead slugmen and tigermen.... I don't think I'll explore it yet...

Whatever you do, don't get the upright weapon. Or else...

[Musashi]

My mini-fortifications labyrinth was a bad plan. 3 Forgotten Beasts took down every single door in no time, and one of them had deadly dust that seems to... err... rot stuff at high speed.
Fortunately, I walled it all off in time.
Plan B: the famed cave-in method. If I do it well, I can kill all three at the same time.
But damn.

[Korva]

Pre-Post edit: HOLY SHIT I HAVE CUBIC SHITLOADS OF CHALK, MAGNETITE, AND COAL!!!! FUCK YEAH!!!! AND IT HAS A WATERFALL AND 5 RIVERS!!! AND THIS IS EPIC!!!

A waterfall and five rivers? What biome(s)? If they are interesting too, you could post this in the cookbook thread.

[Mister Always]

Just embarked on a new map. One corner is dominated by the corners of mountains (always nice) that are full of gems.

There's also a giant eagle on the map. Luckily it's like 40 z-levels up.

[TolyK]

Pre-Post edit: HOLY SHIT I HAVE CUBIC SHITLOADS OF CHALK, MAGNETITE, AND COAL!!!! FUCK YEAH!!!! AND IT HAS A WATERFALL AND 5 RIVERS!!! AND THIS IS EPIC!!!

A waterfall and five rivers? What biome(s)? If they are interesting too, you could post this in the cookbook thread.

Actually I just counted: 1 river/waterfall, 2 other (same-level) in-rivers, and 1 out-lead.
those are really just streams.

I have a barren biome with boulders... badlands I think. Over 7 layers of sedimentary, with loads of flux, fuel, and ore. I just changed the large embark with civs and year I think, so I guess this is just random.
but I can check if you want.

[Kolbur]

I was just building my first defenses in the spring of the second year to be ready for the autumn. That's usually the time the goblins start their first ambushes. The elven caravan should arrive soon I thought and then it arrived... in form of an elven ambush squad full of archers! Damn, we are at war with those blasted Elf bastards! My cat triggered the ambush just outside of my open entry hole so I tried to wall off the staircase quickly but that failed when the cat was not distracting them long enough and they entered my fortress. My only chance now was to recruit every single dwarf and rush the elves. Haha, those pansy elves fled as soon as my dwarves killed the first elf! They fired a lot of arrows though but surprisingly no dwarf recruit died. Now I have a bunch of injured dwarves, no doctors and no access to water (first two caverns have no water at all and all surface water is frozen) except an aquifer. This will be FUN!

[Urist Imiknorris]

Another elven ambush. Swordsmen led by a bowman. I found out much to my delight that my militia commander had managed to scrounge up a full set of (mostly copper) armor.

...And another ambush. All swordsmen. This is awesome as hell.

I suggest everyone give elves [CAN_LEARN] instead of [INTELLIGENT] and make ten elven entities.

FOUR MORE GODDAMN AMBUSHES

Two swordsmen, one spearmen, one bowmen led by a unicorn-mounted swordsman.

AAAAAAAA

Swordsmen led by a spearman. At this point I've got everyone in a squad, but now the elves have the dual advantages of numbers and better armor than everyone but my militia commander.

DAMMIT ANOTHER ONE SHOWED UP IN MY FARMS. THIS MAKES 8 AMBUSHES. THAT'S AS MANY AS TWO FOURS. AND THAT'S TERRIBLE.

Half my population is dead now. My militia commander may be the only survivor of this.

FINAL EDIT: Screw this, I'm abandoning. Population is 3. All soldiers.

[FrisianDude]

Hahahahaha, holy shit.


Holy fucking fuck, I'm deleting my old saves now and it's ended 1,71 GB. Fuuu, no wonder my c:/ drive was getting full.

[Musashi]

OH C'MON
One more FB has arrived.
... I can hope to take out the less deadly, flying one the alternate way. As for the others, I'm gonna need meatshields. Damn monsters dispersed at various parts of the cavern and move a bit too much for me to simply move the future cave-ins to them.