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[Uzu Bash]

I upgraded to .18, and just played through without dfclean. The spearmaster's daughter dropped unconscious on the hospital floor. Then the nausea. She was covered in water fortunately, so she must've gotten clean before it took effect, or made only brief contact while getting soaked. I searched around the possible places and couldn't find the extract. Lots of blood and dyes at wells, pools and mistfalls, but no extract.

And then I noticed something: everywhere puddles from patient watering used to lie are now covered with beds, tables and chairs. The puddles are still there, but for as long as I can remember, there hasn't been any contaminants on them. Those used to be the main culprits, the places where I'd find animals and children in particular walking away with syndromes from a pool of extract.

So I installed chairs over the non-grated tiles, and as soon as they were down, all pools and contaminants were vanished, as I expected. I'd tried this to force cleanups before, but usually deconstructed afterward. This time I'll watch and see what happens in the wake of the next washing dwarf.

No dice. The furniture hauler who constructed the chair left gobs of gore on the tile. The next dwarf to walk down the misty row left the second chair bloodsplattered.

And just to see why only three dwarves at a time would clean themselves, I banned the three freshwater wells. It took them awhile to figure out, then suddenly seven dwarves at a time wanted to clean themselves, and prefered the muddy well equally to cavern water and the perfectly fresh aqueduct. This made things worse, because now there are contaminants scattered everywhere underground and along the aqueduct walkway.

And now I also know that dwarves will queue up and keep completely occupied the most potable sources that patients rely on for their lives. What a bunch of assholes.

I just can't play this without dfclean.

[Torgan]

Hm, it's the return of the bleeding feet syndrome. An ex-mayor and now planter had the time to reach the hospital, but not a bed this time, before he dropped dead and devoid of blood. He cancelled his task in the same general area as the previous victim: in the huge external refuse stockpile.
I'd investigate seriously, if I weren't happy about getting rid of another mouth effortlessly. Seriously, I got a bunch of migrants that can hardly do anything... again. Maybe I can trick a noble into walking there if they start being unreasonable.

I would guess that their shoes had worn away and they were walking through corrosive blood or ichor from a forgotten beast.  I've saved one or two dwarfs from it by getting them to the hospital before it was too serious and a surgeon cut away the infected flesh.  Pretty nasty though as all my animals were dropping dead leaving miasma everywhere which coupled with dead pets led to a lot of tantrums.

In my newest fort embarked in a haunted region, nightwing appeared within the first month and drained my expedition leader and axedwarf of blood before I ragequit.  I much preferred the zombie frogs that didn't really do much.

[proxn_punkd]

Mysteriously, all food stockpiles have stopped accepting food. This is a problem, as I am something of an overachiever in the food production department. Making new food stockpiles has not helped.

If its affecting new stockpiles as well, you may have accidentally turned off "Dwarves haul food" under the (o)rders menu. I had the exact same problem a couple of months ago, and that's what had happened to me.

D'oh! Thanks, now the fort's bustling to get rid of all those *Rotten Draltha Tallow Roast*s.

[Uzu Bash]

Whatever bug made my two-term mayor like slade has been patched so that she never demands it. And so her demands are reasonable, and make good practice for the apprentices. "Here's you three copper buckets and two armor stands, expedited. Happy now? Okay, she's gone now gents, you can melt them down."

[Musashi]

Oh, right, the shoes.
... nothing is preventing them from picking up newer ones. They are literally littered EVERYWHERE. Some deceased gobbo must have had your size, don't be picky.
In other news, my first prisoner miraculously survived. He was put in a nice cell, but everyone forgot to feed him at some point, and he spent a whole month staring at random guys taking their lunch to eat in the empty, open cells, including all my soldiers (because I had the bright idea to make one room the jail AND the barracks, you know, in case a criminal breaks out and goes berserk; I only fully close the cells with vertical bars if they seem too strong for their restraint or deserve their punishment).

EDIT: AHAHAHAHAHAH DRAGON
it died on the 3rd weapon trap or so before any dorf could reach it but DRAGON
and my first burning thing: a war dog corpse, unreachable by my water system! Man.

[Samuel]

I have decided that my next fortress will have 2-tile bedrooms, one for the door, one for the bed. Migrants just come way too fast for me to keep up with bedroom carving, and the residential section is over half my fortress.

[Dutchling]

I ordered my dwarves (all of my dwarves are in the military) to attack the Frogmen

there were a few problems:
1) goblins joined the frogs
2) I only had like 6 metal axes so the other 50 or so dwarves had to use woorden weapons
3) none of the dwarves decided to actually TAKE the axes
4) the only dwarf capaple of killing 10 gobbos/frogs (expedition leader/miner) because of his pick, decided to go berserk and kill a dwarf, so I sent the remainder of the unequiped military to kill him get killed
5) after I finally decide I will let this fortress die, the gobbos and frogmen leave
6) so I hope the miner will kill everyone: dehydration
7) so I'll just close the doors so my dorfs die right? IMMIGRANTS!!!
8)DF is now runnig on the background and I hope everyone ius dead now... or else....

This is going on right now...

EDIT:
9) more frogmen arrived!
10) more stranglers arrived!
11) instead of entering my fortress and killing everyone, 15 frogmen and stranglers decide to team up and kill the lone dwarf that was still outside (and is faster than them)

[NewSheoth]

I have decided that my next fortress will have 2-tile bedrooms, one for the door, one for the bed. Migrants just come way too fast for me to keep up with bedroom carving, and the residential section is over half my fortress.

One word: dormitory. More words: a legendarily engraved and perfectly decorated public dormitory. Takes up less space, less time and less effort for almost equal effect.

11) instead of entering my fortress and killing everyone, 15 frogmen and stranglers decide to team up and kill the lone dwarf that was still outside (and is faster than them)

*Benny Hill music*

[Herbiie]

I have decided that my next fortress will have 2-tile bedrooms, one for the door, one for the bed. Migrants just come way too fast for me to keep up with bedroom carving, and the residential section is over half my fortress.

My Fortress is above-ground, I have to keep building bedrooms because it takes so much time. Especially as I've created it entirely out of Marble.

[(name here)]

Just killed a forgotten beast with noxious secretions. Hopefully, the fact that it was underwater at the time renders that essentially harmless.

[bremarv]

a forgotten beast syndrom causing blisters are tearing trough twinklecrypt. For a long time it was just these two dwarfs resting every now and then so I didn't really care. right now I have around 20-30 dwarfs resting their injuries, going back to work and then cancel to rest again. Probably have something to do with recently filling up some reactors, so everyone that went to the well to help was infected.

What really worries me is that all the dwarfs have their heads and particularily their mouths covered in blood and forgotten beast extract. and by covered I mean 20 pages of it. I think my dwarfs splash their face with goblin blood to wake up in the morning and brush their teeth using forgotten beast extract.

edit: found a child wearing nothing but 172 pages of blood and fb extracts oO
thats over 2500 different blood stains...

[Urist Imiknorris]

Just killed a forgotten beast with noxious secretions. Hopefully, the fact that it was underwater at the time renders that essentially harmless.

Obsidianize the water just to be safe.

[AngleWyrm]

Early Spring of 501 in Outpost Ringquest, pop.7  fps 100(35)

We've followed the iced over brook south of town, to expand the mountainhome of The Crowded Merchants. settling just outside town near the Sacrificial Swamps. It is my hope to find Sun Berries in these serene swamps when the snow melts, even though some of it is under Conglomerate aquafir. We'll still have a way down through the Fresh Wall of dolomite that covers most of the northern area. This place is flatland, with a brook that runs through the middle, back into town. Humans have an encampment nearby, as well as elves and goblins. No kobolds to speak of, but I don't miss those thieving troublesome little runts.

The Cloudy Pillar arrives to start outpost Ringquest. Snow covers most of the land, and no ponds or lakes are visible for draining. We'll have to route water from the river to make a suitable farm, which means getting a mechanic's workshop up soon. No animals visible as far as the eye can see in the snowdrifts, but that may change soon. Plenty of trees though, so we'll be set for beds and fuel for the forge. I do hope that we strike iron soon.

We've begun moving food indoors to prevent theft before the animals arrive, and the lumberjack is hard at work cutting down lumber for our eventual need for beds, bins, barrels, and fuel.

Due to a clumsy oversight, only three picks were brought, so one of the miners is assisting with hauling jobs and the like until the metal forge is up and running. Metal industry has become the new priority after the farms are going.

It's only our second week here, and already the snow has melted away from the swamps; I've sent the growers to harvest as much as possible, in the search for Sun Berries.

With the melting snow, mountain creatures have descended to the area; an incredibly huge hoary marmot, oddly by himself, and a pair of mountain goats. Thanks to my keen study of animal wildlife back in school, I now realize that we will not be troubled by alligators in this area, but there still remains an unknown possibility of giant eagles. I had heard rumor that Dungeon Masters can tame them, but haven't seen a dungeon master in many years. Still, the elves might bring giant eagles if they live nearby. Probably unnecessary, but I'll train up some crossbow dwarves early, just in case.

Gah! Dwarven slackers. They didn't pull the farm water inlet floodgate lever fast enough, and now the dining room is flooded. I plan on tiling the floor anyway, so the mud is no problem. It's just unprofessional.

[Internet Kraken]

Part 3 of my LP is up.

Not sure how well it's going due to a complete lack of feedback. I'm wondering if I'm just wasting my time on it. Oh well.

Spoiler: Large image (click to show/hide)

The H.F.S discussed at the end of the update and pictured here is something I originally came up with in Townbrush, but couldn't implement on account of constant death. I figured that I have a giant body of water next to me, why the hell don't I use it?

 The first concept called for filling the moat with zombies, but tame hippos will probably be more manageable and deadly. That is assuming I can think of a good way to capture the hippos without getting my dwarves killed. If I caught tame ooze pods, I could chain them up on the walls to have them fire globs of ooze at invaders. Of course that probably won't be very effective, but every bit helps. Come to think of it I should probably implement some kind of drainage system. Eh, I'm sure it will be fine though.

The zombie version of the H.F.S. is still being implemented in the other fort I'm running. Tame animals wouldn't be viable on account of the water freezing every winter. But zombies are in abundance, and losing them to the winter freeze won't be an issue. This may work very well. Shame I accidentally drowned two dwarves in the process of building this. Still, a paltry 3 deaths is pretty good considering my previous track record.

[Urist Imiknorris]

A hippo moat.

Why didn't I think of that. I had a hipposplosion in my last fort, and my only idea was to kill them and make bolts out of their bones and backpacks out of their skins.