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[escondida]

The Scholarkeys Chronicle, 1st Sandstone, 128 (Inod Lancebowels, manager, bookkeeper and managing editor)
Breaking news

Three out of the five artifacts so far produced in Scholarkeys have been coffins: one of wood, one of stone, one of green glass. All three were due to possessions by unknown forces. Head of Research Libash Coppertorches therefore cautions citizens of the Torches of Speech to keep in mind that this desert appears to have an Anima Locus, and that it is likely hostile.

In related news, burrowed teams of miners with conveniently located (and painstakingly relocated as exploration continued) block stockpiles were successful in mining out an unprecidented amount of candy without incident. All citizens of the Torches of Speech are advised to ignore any screams, pleas for help, or other sounds originating from behind the rock wall in what remains of the lower candy spire. Libash Coppertorches told reporters today that these are merely hallucinations caused by an excess of sobriety due to trekking so far below the fort, and not due to any blasphemies against reality itself that may or may not have been unleashed by alleged irresponsible digging practices. Any citizen seen to be attempting to dig through the remaining candy or to deconstruct the gabbro block wall in the spire will be reassigned to the experimental magmanautics team. Please direct any further inquiries regarding this to the office of Libash Coppertorches. "We are very interested in this phenomenon," Coppertorches responded to reporters' questions. "In fact, we are actively recruiting research assistants to help us determine the exact nature of these hallucinations, as well as the effects of prolonged exposure to the affected area."

The forgotten beast Ohid was successfully dispatched by Unib Bustpartners, the Shaken Sheen of Cavities, without incident. How Ohid was able to breach the fortress from the (previously believed to be sealed) upper caverns is under investigation. The friendly neighborhood militia commander, Rith Portalbeast, the Triangular Shred of Focus, commended Unib's courage in the face of deadly dust and rhythmic undulation. Cerol Rampartpeaked, head mason, declined to comment on possible weaknesses in the walls, and Kib Fencerout (acting chief miner after the mysterious disappearance of Ilral Lashchasm, previous chief miner) commented only "They're coming, oh gods, the pits, the screams, that light that was not light! What have we done? What have we unleashed? Some things dwarfkind was never meant to know." What a card!

Finally, a goblin splinter group identifying themselves as "The Terrors of Counselling" has taken credit for the terrorist act of kidnapping that was perpetrated last year. Citizens are advised to stay within the fort proper during the last month of any season, but our brave militia commander, Rith Portalbeast, wishes to assure citizens that the goblin situation is well in hand. "Most of the fort never even knew about their pathetic attempt to beseige us until it was over and they were called out to clean up the bodies," Rith said in an exclusive interview this morning. "Rest assured that, to date, only two goblins and no kobolds have ever escaped Scholarkeys alive. Any further acts of terror by the so-called "Terrors of Counselling" will be met with swift and decisive vengeance."

[MrRoboto75]

Started a new fort the other day, and it is now in its third or fourth year.  I decided to learn how to military by diving in screaming.

Woodenglooms was to be an above ground fort.  The only things below ground were stockpiles and mining.  Residential stuffs and plump helm farms were dug into a nearby hill.  Except for a few emergency workshops, everything else had to be in above ground buildings.  Additionally the map is divided by a stone road.  I decided that I am not allowed to deconstruct or modify the road (king's orders).

So far the fort is a bunch of buildings on either side of the road.  The buildings mostly are built of each other or are stacked upon each other to save some materials and time.  A tunnel into a nearby hill leads to the apartments.  On top of the hill a squat tower is being erected.

Unfortunately, it is neighbors to both goblins and kobolds.  'Knappers and thieves everywhere.  Considering no metals have been found yet, I decided to use marksmen and crossbows.

Despite only having wood and the occational bone bolts, the four man squad has killed three kobold thieves, one goblin snatcher, and repelled one goblin ambush by making a pike goblin pass out and then bashing his helmed head for a long time.

My military need expandtion and metal.  I may also stock up some blocks for a wall.

[Bludulukus]

Fortressbowel, Year 34, Population 199

Embracestutter, the Quiescent Ruins has been created, an adamantite ring worth 776,400 dwarfbucks.

Necrostandard the dingo is procreating, giving us hope of diversifying away from war dogs, of which we have too many.

Our resident giant toad, Ropecircles the Rages of Purifying has killed its 10th goblin prisoner by biting him in the head, just as it did the other 9.

The expansion of the lavish noble level continues, with the creation of more statue gardens, gem windows, platinum furniture for fine dinner rooms, a coin vault and a zoo where exotic creatures will be displayed. Longtime Mayor Geshud Lovelyfigures has dismissed criticism as "lack of vision from provincial dwarves"

[malimbar04]

Just FYI, wrestlers are amazing for giving your medical staff some ethical training. Broken bones, cut hands while fighting thieves, etc. They're good practice.

Not much else is new. Moving tons of crap around, finally making things long overdue, getting pissed at the generic dwarf corpses from the old undead hoard (which no longer scares me). Lost a child to a snatcher, all normal stuff. oh, and quite happily killing trapped goblin thieves with wrestlers. That's fun to see 10 dwarves gang up on a theif. "agh! stop hitting me! agh, my arm!". Man, it's actually kind've gruesome now that I think about it.

[itg]

Heartmine, Granite 1, 850:

The last of the original seven died of old age. RIP, Reg.

[Lydecker]

Started a new fort in MWDF... things are going smooth for now, after almost 2 years of hard struggle.

All miners were lost to a GCS in the caverns on their way down to magma, then Giant Gray Langurs stole every nickle and dime while beating everyone to pulp and finally a tantrum spiral wiped the rest. I had 4 dwarfs bed ridden, throwing tantrums. The first seven never saw second Spring and the handful of immigrants really saved the fort. Then almost all of them perished the next Autumn, when Giant Hornets came and brought terror to everything above and below ground. Finally managed to wall them out with handful of survivors.

With the last group of immigrants the fortress is starting to grow in strength. Perimeter is somewhat secure, metal industry is going and the ever so troublesome food industry is thriving. All is looking good, but the sandy memorial hall of 30+ coffins and slabs is a grim reminder of how fragile life is in a fortress.

[Iceflame]

A horde of goblins layed siege on my fortress recently. About 50 goblins on giant cave swallows, and a handful of trolls. Some goblins were killed by the dwarven caravan, which was just leaving in the right moment, and the trolls (I think 10 or 15 of them) sohow managed to get on top of my fortified walls into my fortress. However, they were no match for my marksdwarfes.

All goblins remained on the map edge from where they entered the map - even though theyhad (a)flying mounts and (b)my drawbridges were lowered. Even my woodcutter couldn't bait them, when I ordered him to cut down a tree right next to one of them.

So I sent out my 10 of my marksdwarfes to shoot them, maybe they could lead them near my walls. At first, it worked out not exactly as I expected it - even though they continued shooting, the goblins didn't attack. They only moved one or two tiles beside when they were hit. As I didn't want this to be an epic fight - I just wanted the siege to end - I continued shooting them. More and more ran out of ammo, and headed back to the fortress to refill. As there was only one dwarf left, the situation suddenly escalated, when he fired a bolt in the direction of the goblin axelord. Maybe, the bolt reminded him, that he was here to kill dwarfes. He came down the hill, charging towards the poor dwarf. First, he cut off both his legs, then his head. I did, what every good overseer should do in this situation - I ordered every single armed dwarf to kill this bastard.
And they started to march towards him. One after another. And so they were killed. Until suddenly two dwarfes - a marksdwarf recruit and a speardwarf recruit showed up at the same time on the battlefield. The fight started out not that good, as the marksdwarf was knocked out, with both legs broken, and the shieldarm of the other one was cut off. I think the goblin just raised the axe for his final trikle on the speardwarf, when suddenly the marksdwarf woke up und shot a bolt in the goblin's leg, what caused to goblin to fall over, even though only his muscle was bruised. So, the speardwarf saw his chance, and pierced the goblin's head with his spear, through the skull and deep into it's brain, just before dying of blood loss.
These two hits didn't only end the siege, no, it was the first time, both of the dwafes ever used their weapons in any way.

Now, the marksdwarf is lying in the hospital, recovering both his legs. As time passes by, he will be able to fight and defend the fortress again. Also, as a war hero, he got his personal appartment, with a great dining room and a bedroom, and his very own tomb, for him and his wive.

A bunch of new coffins still need to be built for the many fallen soldiers and civilians; Also, the speardwarf will get his very own memorial shrine, right were he died next to the goblin. There he lies, buried deep below the place he died, with his armor and weapon, and the axe weapon of the goblin he killed. At first, I considered to leave the coplin's corpse rot at the memorial, but then I thought of the necromancers, who visit my fortress sometimes, so I decided to burn it in my volcano. The only two things missing in the memorial are statues from both the goblin and the dwarf. Both will be made of gold. Every single forge is building endless amounts of golden statues now, until I finally get the two statues I want.

Every other non-dwarfen corpse was put to my corpse chamber, and will stay there until I find out an effective way to use them. I also captured two necromancers, so I consider building some kind of spread corpses out and revive them on demand defense system. I also may use them for training, or for making a funny zombie goblin horde versus minotaur wrestling event in my arena.

[SeelenJägerTee]

No idea why people claim it would be impossible to be attacked by the elfses in the current build.
Chopped down a few trees. Year later the diplomat arrives and tells me I should stop and I dad been warned.
This year no elven caravan but an attack party (note that I didn't cut down further trees). Left after the first one got hurt by a weapon trap - like one would expect from elves.
Strangely enough they are still listed with (P) in the diplomacy screen.

So I can't confirm that you couldn't get elves to attack you its pretty easy in my experience.

[MrWillsauce]

No idea why people claim it would be impossible to be attacked by the elfses in the current build.
Chopped down a few trees. Year later the diplomat arrives and tells me I should stop and I dad been warned.
This year no elven caravan but an attack party (note that I didn't cut down further trees). Left after the first one got hurt by a weapon trap - like one would expect from elves.
Strangely enough they are still listed with (P) in the diplomacy screen.

So I can't confirm that you couldn't get elves to attack you its pretty easy in my experience.

Give us the save file; it is blessed.

[Pinstar]

I've been behind on setting up my hospital due to lack of fresh water source. Now that I have an injured dwarf begging for water, I need to get a clean cistern setup. Knowing that pumps desalinate water and having only the ocean for my water source (The caverns STILL elude me)I setup a pump next to the ocean and set it to dump into a channel which will flow into a cistern. I have a dwarf come to manually operate the pump and it suddenly floods the channel and washes the pump operator into the ocean... >.<

Now I'm trying to fight with a windmill and machinery and its saying a gearbox can't be placed as there are no mechanisms in route...except the place I'm putting it has access to the rest of the fort and I have plenty of mechanisms availabe...

Oh and I learned that my windmills will be only generating 20 power. I thought the ocean was supposed to be on the windier side. At least it isn't 0...

[shadenight123]

Necromancer showed up.
Guards killed it.
Frost giant showed up.
Ran away screaming like a baby from a coral snake.
...
I have a lich archer posted on the rooftop. She doesn't need to rest, to eat or to drink. She's married and both her son and husband are in the fort already.
She just stand guard atop the highest tower.
Always standing.
Always watching.

I like to think the Frost Giant saw her standing there and simply ran for his life rather than risk a pointless fight against a legendary archer-necromancer.

[flabort]

Hah, who says zombies are only useful in millitary situations?
Urist McLazyAss cancels attend party: Interrupted by Urist McMotivation's mutilated corpse

Only the one zombie in the fort still, somehow evading the 50+ traps I've got all over so far, causing countless interruptions in the production areas (especially of mechanisms and booze), but hasn't managed to harm anyone so far. If he does bug anyone, they just stomp on his guts from far outside his reach and run off. He doesn't have the chance to hurt people (except emotionally, he was related to basically everyone in the fortress).

[smjjames]

I'm starting to do prep for making the dwarven checkerboard for the HFS, although I'm doing a bunch of other stuff first.

In other going ons, the elves brought 3 monitor lizards, a male and two females, among other stuff, which is pretty cool actually, even if I decide not to breed them. I know their pet value isn't great and the modifier is x2, I still think they're cool.

Also, apparently the map edge itself (I mean the actual map border) does not count as a solid foundation since I caused a minor cavein (also realized I had left the cavein announcement off) which dunked a miner into the water. However, instead of going up the ramp he was standing on or even going two tiles east, the idiot miner went southeast 5 tiles and then tried going east, died right on the damned ramp.

Edit: One of my other miners had mooded and just produced a cinnabar armor stand. Not bad, though the thing is probably heavy as heck.

[Icefire2314]

My mechanic got injured by a minecart while making rollers, and went to the hospital... at the hospital, got a strange mood, wasted hospital time making an iron pick as an artifact, then went to go build the rollers only to get... Urist McUrist cancels Construct Building: Resting injury

[shadenight123]

Undead siege with Ice Wizards corpses and more.
I prepared the forty-something soldiers and sent them to war in the name of all that is holy and dwarven.

I already thought I had lost the military, but instead they ALL surprised me.
Lost nine dorf. Tantrum spiral is ensuing just now...
but the siege was broken!
All Hail Destructioncloistered!
And the badass markswarf-lich that summons allied bone golems is really helpful.