The Limbdrum Times "Made of wood to piss off the elves since 102"
1st Edition! 28th Limestone 102
Hello reader and thank you for choosing this, the first issue of the Limbdrum times. We promise to provide you with up to date news about the latest gossip from around the fortress! Does the mayor have scale mites? We'll be the first to let you know! Water from the well taste odd? We'll tell you who's bloated body is down there adding to the flavor! And now, on to the news!
Miner says oops, Liaison becomes a smear!
The outpost liaison died today during the digging of the main hall's skylight. the liaison was following around our expedition leader Levekrix while he was digging out the final sections of the skylight and he happened to stand in the wrong place. Plummeting to his death 35 feet below. Doctor Koraekoth was quickly called to the scene despite a large amount of grumbling about having no medical training whatsoever and examined the liaison. After poking him with a stick a few times, he ruled the liaison dead and a spatula was ordered to clean up the ... (continued page 2A)
Main hall skylight complete, workers beginning work on waterfall plumbing
The main hall's skylight was completed today with much fanfare. Complete with body parts flying through the air similar to the fashion of imported dwarven fireworks. The location was immediately designated as the new meeting hall and it was good. The drainage channel for the planned waterfall is already complete and the tunnel to the brook is almost completed. All that is required is the installation of the safety floodgates and the fortress will never have to worry about unhappiness ever again! The construction is expected to be finished within the week, barring something the miners called "pathfinding issues".
New dining room completed. Happiness polls skyrocket.
The new dining room is quote "Like living in a singularity of pure joy." According to the engraver who engraved the entire room by herself. This editor also sampled the room during his lunch break and found it heavenly. The dining room is planned to be expanded in the future with more chairs and maybe a statue or two as the fortress grows. But as of now the 5 tables and chairs is more than enough for the current small population.