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Author Topic: What's going on in your fort?  (Read 6233281 times)

McDwarf

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17370 on: November 20, 2011, 09:54:16 am »
Quote from: Reudh on November 20, 2011, 07:45:51 am
Well, I captured my baron and tamed him.
You need adjust his pet availability so he can get a dwarven baroness. Then you can assign rooms to him through the dwarf.
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peskyninja

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17371 on: November 20, 2011, 10:10:24 am »
Can unicorns sleep in a bed?
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Burn the land and boil the sea. You can't take the sky from me

Thou son of a b*tch wilt not ever make subjects of Christian sons; we have no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, f**k thy mother.

GaxkangtheUnbound

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17372 on: November 20, 2011, 10:25:22 am »
In other news, the RNG happened  to present a magnificent name for a fortress militia.
Beards of Blocking.
EDIT:And apparently gorlaks have livers in their heads. Imagine that! Instant booze processing!
EDIT2:Hoorah! GOBLIN CHRISTMAS!
« Last Edit: November 20, 2011, 05:54:57 pm by GaxkangtheUnbound »
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Proud of my heritage.
Prepare to lose your sanity.

peskyninja

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17373 on: November 20, 2011, 10:46:10 am »
 ???
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Burn the land and boil the sea. You can't take the sky from me

Thou son of a b*tch wilt not ever make subjects of Christian sons; we have no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, f**k thy mother.

McDwarf

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17374 on: November 20, 2011, 11:21:55 am »
Quote from: peskyninja on November 20, 2011, 10:10:24 am
Can unicorns sleep in a bed?
Can unicorns sleep?

I built a 21x21 (shift+arrow x2) room to store all the finished goods that vistors keep dropping when the die. This has caused my workforce to disappear, and none of my projects are getting done.

This has attracted the attention of the brush Titan, Udast Bungmouzbad Smasta Gaspa, a.k.a. Udast Islandseals the Simplicities of Spring. Udast is a great quadruped composed of clear glass. It has a pair of fan-like antennae and it bears a look of unbelievable peace.
Unfortunately, it is early autum and judging by the length of Udast's name, I don't think it is going to be simple.

EDIT: Udast kicked a stray cat, killing it. My goto military squad took 14 pages to take it down, with the kill going to a grand master potash maker/swordsdwarf. I am concerned about the number of times the squad resorted to beating it with their crutches, which like most attacks against Udast just glanced away. Bites seemed to be the most effective attack fracturing its glass hide.
« Last Edit: November 20, 2011, 11:55:29 am by McDwarf »
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Garath

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17375 on: November 20, 2011, 11:43:17 am »
my fort is dormant, going adventure mode for a bit. so far scored a hydra, a dragon, lotsa night creatures and bandits. going for second dragon now. Next time i start a fort in this world, i expect it to be a lot less wild and evil
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

kisame12794

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17376 on: November 20, 2011, 11:49:58 am »
Quote from: Garath on November 20, 2011, 11:43:17 am
my fort is dormant, going adventure mode for a bit. so far scored a hydra, a dragon, lotsa night creatures and bandits. going for second dragon now. Next time i start a fort in this world, i expect it to be a lot less wild and evil
Your going to have to kill a lot more than that to lower the world savagery. A LOT more.
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris on January 10, 2014, 12:19:05 am
The non-assholes vastly outnumber the assholes but the assholes can fart with greater volume.
Quote from: IronyOwl on September 02, 2014, 09:40:45 pm
((You're an arm and a torso in low orbit. This was the best possible resolution of things.))

McDwarf

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17377 on: November 20, 2011, 03:08:16 pm »
Lookout: The dwarven caravan has arrived!
Broker looking over fortress inventory: Ok, this is what we need to bring to the depot.
Lookout: A vile force of darkness as arrived!
Broker: What?
Lookout: The dwarven caravan has been destroyed!
Broker crying: But I wanted to sell all of that troll clothing we can't use.
Lookout: A kobold is stabbing a baby!
Broker: Wha?
Lookout: Nevermind, one of the bears that wander the fortress chewed on the kobold's head, killing it.
Lookout: And the siegeing goblins wandered through trap alley, I think two of them managed to retreat.
Broker: With the siege broken we might as well send the haulers out to get the supplies the caravan was bringing us.
Hauler: Help! There's a werewolf! He's got my nose!
Broker: What now?
Lookout: One of the haulers has been struck down by the werewolf, Blossomedloot.

UPDATE: An axedwarf cut the werewolf pretty good. First severing the werewolf's lower left arm, then it's two paws, then the remaining lower arm. The killing blow was the severing of the upper left arm.
Hopefully, the dwarves will be safe for a bit.
« Last Edit: November 20, 2011, 03:21:40 pm by McDwarf »
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Eric Blank

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17378 on: November 20, 2011, 03:41:45 pm »
I finally came up with a solution for the tigermen bringing various species of dragons to battle:

I have a pet female lesser dragon. The tigermen bring males (well the chances of not seeing at least one male lesser dragon per seasonal siege are ridiculously small.) Dragons breed by eggs. So I let my dragon out of her pasture (no idea why I had her in a pasture...) and now she's beginning to procreate in the nest boxes. I should lock her in a room the dwarves can't retrieve her eggs from so I can ignore her while she constructs my army of war lesser dragons.

Then? TO WAR!
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I make Spellcrafts!
Quote from: Andreus on June 09, 2011, 02:07:07 pm
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

GaxkangtheUnbound

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17379 on: November 20, 2011, 06:18:43 pm »
I think I have a goblin cult trying to steal children from me.
EVERYTHING they decorate has a forgotten beast on it. Even their civilization symbol is a forgotten beast.
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Proud of my heritage.
Prepare to lose your sanity.

Kepplerr

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17380 on: November 20, 2011, 06:55:20 pm »
I just learned what happens when dig up into an ocean...
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Quote from: King DZA on December 03, 2011, 06:27:00 pm
Having a sudden increase of additional units in the area can take your FPS down like a paraplegic on an ice covered hill.

proxn_punkd

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17381 on: November 20, 2011, 07:09:30 pm »
Quote from: Kepplerr on November 20, 2011, 06:55:20 pm
I just learned what happens when dig up into an ocean...

Sounds like fun!
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Kepplerr

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17382 on: November 20, 2011, 07:15:06 pm »
Quote from: proxn_punkd on November 20, 2011, 07:09:30 pm
Quote from: Kepplerr on November 20, 2011, 06:55:20 pm
I just learned what happens when dig up into an ocean...

Sounds like !!FUN!!

FTFY
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Quote from: King DZA on December 03, 2011, 06:27:00 pm
Having a sudden increase of additional units in the area can take your FPS down like a paraplegic on an ice covered hill.

itisnotlogical

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17383 on: November 20, 2011, 07:31:20 pm »
My fortress's pets keep killing small animals and bringing them inside faster than my small population can haul them out. I have the feeling I'm going to have to abandon this fort soon due to miasma-related fun.
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This game is Curtain Fire Shooting Game.
Girls do their best now and are preparing. Please watch warmly until it is ready.

Kepplerr

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Re: What's going on in your fort?
« Reply #17384 on: November 20, 2011, 07:32:21 pm »
By pets do you mean cats? If so, you could just cage them all.
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Quote from: King DZA on December 03, 2011, 06:27:00 pm
Having a sudden increase of additional units in the area can take your FPS down like a paraplegic on an ice covered hill.
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