Reanimate Remuthra and NAV with my eldritch tentacles, and enthrall them to the cause of Xantalos.
[6] You reanimate the dead corpses of Remuthra and NAV to serve as servants of Xantalos. As the reanimation occurs, they become larger and sprout many tentacles and are filled with an eldritch energy more powerful than yours. You will need concentration to keep them under control or they may turn against you.
Oh, and shoo all that lawyer gas out of my realm. Go pump it into the nearest dwarf fortress.
Your attempt to pump all the lawyer gas into the nearest dwarf fortress has failed. The fortress in particular - situated on a glacier in the barren wasteland of nowhere - has some kind of glowing statue preventing the gas from entering the perimeter of the fortress' territory. You may need to send your minions there to destroy it for you.
Continue working on ORCS with the feedback of fans
[5] With the help of your loyal fans to provide direction you set to work improving ORCS, making it better in almost every conceivable way and initiating a new surge of sales! You are now an objectively wealthy video game programmer! You are very popular with gamers! You receive a letter from EA telling you they wish to buy your property for....1 billion dollars!
Escape from the cats.
[Autosuccess] You successfully do nothing and continue to not be trapped by cats.
]use BREAKET on armok god
(remembered bracket
[5+5] With the power of grisha5 you launch a fearsome attack against the god of blood, banishing him to whence he came! grisha5 is most pleased with you!
Followers of Toady One may no longer make wishes.For Gabe!
Crowbar smash toady!
[3] [1] You smash Nidilap with the crowbar and now his jaw doesn't work any more!
Keep crowbar and fight off Yourmaster.
[6] You beat Yourmaster upside the head with the crowbar so hard that not only does he die, but the crowbar shatters into [5] 5 pieces and fly into your face! grisha5 chuckles to himself. That sneaky devil.
Yourmaster has been struck down!Be an unaffiliated being that just wants to keep their head low until they accidentally destroy one of the objects of worship of one of the cults and then tries to destroy the rest to be 'fair' to the first group.
[2] [2] You are a worshipper of Toady One. Praise the One Toad!
Use a vacuum to suck up all the blood.
[4+5] You suck up all the blood! Including yours!
IMMINENT DEATH.Spam shock images, sacrificing my account to summon the One Toad into this thread.
Please don't.
Ignite F2O2 cake to get it to react with the lawyer-gas. Lob burning cake at Xantalos.
[1+5] You lob the burning cake across time and cake and explode it into Xantalos' realm! The portal is now even wider!
Whip out majestic beard to blind enemies
[3] It's a neckbeard.
Ask mighty grisha to grant me protection.
[4+5] grisha endows you with the magical protection of 1 billion sets of armour! Nothing can destroy you! Except grisha5, who strips your armour from you for worshipping a false god! Shameful display!
grisha5 cult is at 5 members and may destroy any one person from one cult! It is fifth page, giving grisha5 cultists 5 jelly rolls each!