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[BlitzDungeoneer]

Well, excuse me, but Zan is the one not answering my PM questions, so...

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Spoiler: Finally (click to show/hide)

General Information
Name: Fuar
Gender: Male
Age: 20
Race: Frost Demon
Appearance: Fuar, as a frost demon, looks very similar to Frieza in all of his forms. In his first, second and third forms, he is missing his left horn. Also, while Frieza is white and purple, Fuar is blue and light grey.
Biography: Fuar was, as far as he knows, abandoned as a small child on a space ship for whatever reason. He drifted in space for years, during which he discovered he had a knack for what he later discovered was called magic. He practiced this, along with his ki abilities, during the 7 or so years he spent merely drifting through space. Eventually, the ship, quite by accident, landed on a planet known to its inhabitants as... Earth. He has since lived a 'hermitic' lifestyle, living in the mountains he landed on and training his abilities.

Statistics
Health: 40
Ki Strength: 375
Mystic Power: 240
Focus: 31.25
Soul Purity: 50

Abilities
Environmental Immunity - This race takes no damage from fighting in any environment, such as lack of oxygen, extreme heat or cold, or other hazards.
Extreme Durability - So long as an attack does not result in you taking more than 10 points of damage past 0, then you will still be alive and can be reconstructed.
Transformation: Power States - The Frost Demon race has four forms unlocked at the start.  The first Form takes the base Ki and multiplies it by .5, while multiplying Focus by 2.  The second Form takes the base Ki and multiplies it by .75 and multiplies Focus by 1.33.  The third Form takes the base ki and multiplies it by .9 and multiplies Focus by 1.11.  The Fourth Form takes the base ki and multiplies it by 40, but, untrained, focus is hit with a multiplier of .10.

Techniques
Name: Piercing Spear
Inventor: Fuar
Type: Ki
Appearance: A reddish, jagged beam of light is shot from the user's index finger.
Charge Time: 10
Effects: 3 damage, piercing
Exertion: 6

Name: Flight
Inventor: Who Knows?
Type: Ki
Appearance: None
Charge Time: 1
Effects: The user is able to blatantly ignore gravity and fly through the air.
Exertion: 0.1 per TU

Name: Full Power Energy Wave
Inventor:
Type: Ki
Appearance: A large purple beam of energy, shot from the hands of the user.
Charge Time: 20
Effect: 5 damage
Exertion: 8

Name: Time Accel
Inventor: Fuar
Type: Mystic
Appearance: The eyes of the user begin to glow a light yellow.
Charge Time: 3
Effect: Multiplies the user's Time Units by 1.4
Exertion: 15

Name: Time Deccel
Inventor: Fuar
Type: Mystic
Appearance: The target becomes surrounded by a bluish-white aura
Charge Time: 5
Effect: Multiplies the targets time units by 0.7
Exertion: 15

Finally finished up my sheet.

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

Time to begin critique of the current sheets.

You have a typo in your history by having put 'wondering the world' instead of 'wandering the world'.  Everything else appears to be correct; though adding an additional 1 to Spirit Shotgun to apply a spread effect to it (described along the lines of 'goes out X squares before splitting across adjacent squares along the path, power dividing among the break.  Break only happens Y times.), and the .5 exertion for non-mastered techniques is an additional .5 for every 3 exertion.  Could have the techniques you know having been learned from a master with one or two self created, but that is something minor.  One thing I have to ask about is why you have techniques that do the exact same thing as others (Spirit Gun and Demon Gun have the same stats, and Spirit Gun Mega and Demon Gun Mega also share the same stats).  Might be better to have them have different power out/effects or something if you want to use all of them, or remove one from each of the two overlaps for a different skill.  Note that you can use the Human's 'Dragon's Wisdom' power on your techniques.

You can remove the 'Soul Purity' stat, as that isn't being used.  You will also want to rebalance your skills, as the way you have them currently is numbered off of the old system.  As said to Stirk, you could have a skill or two having been learned by someone else.

You will also want to rebalance your exertion/damage/charge time to the new system.  Could have flight changed to equal .1 per TU and have it be a free action technique.  May want to come up with a name for Ayeto's father.  If you can't think of one easily, don't forget that Saiyan names from the series are based off of vegetables.

Could you make the Ki battery into one of your techniques, so that you can provide what the max amount of Ki it can hold is?  You can also remove the charge time for the Ki Charging, and instead put it as a per time unit effect, with the rate of how fast it charges up the battery per time unit.  I'm going to have to review the Low-Level Ki release effect a bit more later, as for now it is a little complex to decipher.  Ki drain you might want to do the same thing as the Ki Charging, having it be an exertion of per time unit and an effect of how fast it drains, may want to keep the charge time for that one, but you can lower it by a bit, considering how each round has an average of 5 TU, which would cause it to take 6 rounds to even start taking effect (Note that you may wind up getting less TU than even 5 in fights, with would wind up extending the time til effect even longer).  As for Focused Beam, you have the exertion a bit low.  Current system would put it at 4.5, as you do have an effect for it.

Going to need to change over from the Seconds system to the Time Units system, which would involve modifying your Exertion/Effects/Charge stats on the techniques.  Looks fairly good besides that.

As I mentioned for Yourmaster, you may want to change over flight from .5 per round to .1 per TU.  For Manticore Gauntlet, may want to set it so that it is 5/charge level.  May want to have the Manticore Bullet Barrage break the Manticore Gauntlet when that technique is used, possibly requiring the Gauntlet be at the second level.

As I mentioned for Yourmaster and Andres, you may want to change over flight from .5 per round to .1 per TU.  On Time Accel and Time Deccel, you will probably want it to have it have a per TU exertion, rather than a one time thing, or have it last for X of your Time Units.  As Frost Demons can live for exceptionally long periods of time, you may want to shoot up the age by a bit.

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Hmm...
I'm not really sure what you mean by a per TU exertion for Time Accel and Deccel.
Fixing flight and the other thing, though.

[Stirk]

You have a typo in your history by having put 'wondering the world' instead of 'wandering the world'.  Everything else appears to be correct; though adding an additional 1 to Spirit Shotgun to apply a spread effect to it (described along the lines of 'goes out X squares before splitting across adjacent squares along the path, power dividing among the break.  Break only happens Y times.), and the .5 exertion for non-mastered techniques is an additional .5 for every 3 exertion.  Could have the techniques you know having been learned from a master with one or two self created, but that is something minor.  One thing I have to ask about is why you have techniques that do the exact same thing as others (Spirit Gun and Demon Gun have the same stats, and Spirit Gun Mega and Demon Gun Mega also share the same stats).  Might be better to have them have different power out/effects or something if you want to use all of them, or remove one from each of the two overlaps for a different skill.  Note that you can use the Human's 'Dragon's Wisdom' power on your techniques.

I think I will end up adding the spread effect to the shotgun, though the others having the same stats was *kind of* intentional. It was meant to give me a choice between mystic and ki attacks. If you think that is too boring or whatever, I would happily change the stats to something more varied. Honestly I am a bit confused about what "Dragon's Wisdom" does. I thought it was something meant for techniques built in-game and not having anything to do with character creation.

Also, I will totally fix my stupid typo  . I completely forgot about the non-mastered penalty too.

[Yourmaster]

Ateyo's father is names spinkara.

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

I'm not really sure what you mean by a per TU exertion for Time Accel and Deccel.

Each time unit passed costs X exertion to maintain the effect.

I think I will end up adding the spread effect to the shotgun, though the others having the same stats was *kind of* intentional. It was meant to give me a choice between mystic and ki attacks. If you think that is too boring or whatever, I would happily change the stats to something more varied. Honestly I am a bit confused about what "Dragon's Wisdom" does. I thought it was something meant for techniques built in-game and not having anything to do with character creation.

Oh, hey, I didn't notice that one was Ki and the other was Mystic.  My mistake.

Ateyo's father is names spinkara.

Okay.

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Wouldn't that make it cost more as I got stronger?

[Shadestyle]

When a new Ki battery is "Learned" Should I just Update the Technique, or replace it with a new one. Actually a good question would be, how do technique variations work, like, if someone knew the Kamehameha, and then learned the variant for shooting it from the feet, Would that be a brand new technique, or is there a distinction?

Reworked sheet to fit new parameters.

Spoiler: Sheet (click to show/hide)

General Information
Name: Doctor Andrew Axal.
Gender: Male
Age: 41
Race: Human.
Appearance: A Slightly overweight heavily tanned Hawaiian male, with a clean shaven face,
a graying ponytail, and a white Doctor's coat, he wears light Kevlar body armor underneath his
coat and puffed up shorts, he wears no shoes.

Biography:          Dr. Axal worked alongside Dr. Giro in the red ribbon army, but was "Removed"
before it's destruction, through his connections, however, he survived and found Dr Giro's
notes, which prompted him to seek out a means of augmenting himself with these additions in the hopes of becoming
immortal. He has since then realized the futility in his actions after a stern (Read; hilarious)
talking to from his wife and lives a peaceful life in West City, until people (read; other players)
came to his door seeking assistance in saving the world, for the sake of his wife and three children
he breaks out his High capacity Ki battery-Pack and bionic left hand and suits up.


Statistics
Health: 50/50 
Battery 1 Health: 25/25
Battery 2 Health: 25/25
Ki Strength: 300
Battery 1 Ki charge: 0/30
Battery 2 Ki charge: 0/45
Mystic Power: 300
Focus: 25

Abilities

Dragon’s Gift - Being from the planet where the Dragon Balls are most often used, this race has a multiplier of 1.5 to their side of the power equation when attacking or defending.
Dragon’s Wisdom - Being from the planet where the Dragon Balls are most often used, this race has a frightening ability to have techniques created by them to have a key portion of the creation multiplied by a factor of 2, allowing techniques to be created faster or more powerful with shorter charge times.
Indomitable - During times of crisis, the power of the strikes of humans can skyrocket and have them punch above their weight by, if below 10% health, pouring their own life energy into their attacks, for an addition to the Dragon's Gift multiplier equal to how much health is spent.

Techniques

Name:Ki battery Level 1
Appearance: Two large pill shaped white containers with black lines around the middle, and an indicator on each showing it's maximum capacity, nozzels on the top of each one suck up ambient Ki from Dr Axal.
Type: Ki
Inventor: Dr. Axal
Effect: Stores a maximum 75 Ki (30 ki in the first capsule, and 45 in the second.) The capsules each have 25 Health, and can be targeted similar to a saiyan tail.

Name:Ki Charging Level 1
Charge time: 1 Ki per 1 TU
Inventor: Dr. Axal
Appearance: A small Blue Aura Explodes out of Dr. Axal, constantly being sucked into a nozzle on of his Ki batteries.
Type: Ki
Effect: Stores a Portion of current Ki to fill the first slot of Dr. Axal's Ki battery, Lowering his max power level until he undergoes rest or a restorative effect.
Exertion: 2.5

Name: Low Level Ki Release
Charge time: 5 TU
Inventor: Dr. Axal
Appearance: Dr. Axal's Eyes Close, Then shoot open as One of his ki batteries beep, An aura one magnitude higher than his current one appears around him. If both batteries are drained, His aura disappears completely, and Small jets of Purple and Blue energy Spew out from his Outer joints like a twisted welding torch, this represents The amount of "artificial" ki in his body beginning to dampen his normal life force's appearance.
Type: Ki
Effects: Releases 1 Ki battery charge to Boost Dr. Axal's power level equal to Ki stored. Both can be released at once, But only if both are at 100% capacity.
Exertion: 0.5

Name: Ki drain
Charge time: 4 TU, Then 1% Ki Per TU
Appearance: Red Blips Flow up from Dr. Axal's Hand, going into his ki batteries.
Type: Ki
Inventor: Dr. Giro/Axal
Effect: Drains 1% of Remaining Ki from Held unit, Can be placed into a Ki battery at no loss, But if transferred to Dr. Axal, 50% of it is lost If the amount drained per time unit is Higher than 20% of Dr Axal's power level, He takes Damage equal to 1% of the target's power level per TU.
Exertion: 1.5 Per TU

Name: Focused Beam
Charge time: 15
Inventor: Dr. Wheelo/Axal
Appearance: A purple flaming beam of energy from Dr. Axal's Bionic left hand, Which spreads out as it travels.
Type: Ki
Effects: Damage: 4. At no more than 2 units, deals penetrative Damage, But past 10 Distance units, deals an AOE cone of damage equal to half the attack's default damage. at a maximum effective range of 20 Distance units. the max width is 5 Distance units. People on the fringe of the technique's cone take Damage equal to a normal attack, and are knocked back slightly.
Exertion: 5

[Andres]

As I mentioned for Yourmaster, you may want to change over flight from .5 per round to .1 per TU.  For Manticore Gauntlet, may want to set it so that it is 5/charge level.  May want to have the Manticore Bullet Barrage break the Manticore Gauntlet when that technique is used, possibly requiring the Gauntlet be at the second level.

5 exertion or 5 damage? I'm guessing you mean exertion. I can't really make it cost even more exertion or it would cost too much to use the MBB (at the moment it's only worth it if I fire it for 5 consecutive rounds). Maybe I can half the damage of the gauntlets?

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

As I mentioned for Yourmaster, you may want to change over flight from .5 per round to .1 per TU.  For Manticore Gauntlet, may want to set it so that it is 5/charge level.  May want to have the Manticore Bullet Barrage break the Manticore Gauntlet when that technique is used, possibly requiring the Gauntlet be at the second level.

5 exertion or 5 damage? I'm guessing you mean exertion. I can't really make it cost even more exertion or it would cost too much to use the MBB (at the moment it's only worth it if I fire it for 5 consecutive rounds). Maybe I can half the damage of the gauntlets?

I was talking about how you said the Manticore Gauntlet could be charged even further for the quadruple damage for the 5/chrage level.

[Andres]

As I mentioned for Yourmaster, you may want to change over flight from .5 per round to .1 per TU.  For Manticore Gauntlet, may want to set it so that it is 5/charge level.  May want to have the Manticore Bullet Barrage break the Manticore Gauntlet when that technique is used, possibly requiring the Gauntlet be at the second level.

5 exertion or 5 damage? I'm guessing you mean exertion. I can't really make it cost even more exertion or it would cost too much to use the MBB (at the moment it's only worth it if I fire it for 5 consecutive rounds). Maybe I can half the damage of the gauntlets?

I was talking about how you said the Manticore Gauntlet could be charged even further for the quadruple damage for the 5/chrage level.

Double-charging would take up another 5 TU, would eat up another 3 Focus, and would have a total constant exertion drain of 1 per round. Also, it does double-damage for two different things - not quadruple damage.

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

Double-charging would take up another 5 TU, would eat up another 3 Focus, and would have a total constant exertion drain of 1 per round. Also, it does double-damage for two different things - not quadruple damage.

I was saying you use the 5/charge level for charge time as a way to define how long it would take to get the manticore gauntlet to that point.  It appears that I forgot to note in the OP that melee damage is only .25 damage as its base, thought that has the effect of allowing multiple strikes in a round at a cost of .5 focus for additional strikes and burns through 1 TU.  As you appear to having been working under the assumption that melee is 1 damage per strike.

May want to change the Manticore Gauntlet to this:

Name: Manticore Gauntlet
Inventor: Pree
Appearance: An energy orb entirely covering the hand
Type: Ki
Charge Time: 5 per Charge Level
Effects: There are three Charge Levels for this techinque.
Charge Level 1 causes this to deal 1 damage on a melee strike, but causes the Gauntlet to break on the strike.  Charge Level 2 causes an increase to 2 in melee strike damage and allows access to the Manticore Bullet Barrage.  Charge Level 3 causes the gauntlet to reduce damage for a melee strike to .5 but does not break on strike.  In addition, the damage dealt by the Manticore Bullet Barrage is doubled.
Exertion: 3 to create, 0.2 per TU to maintain level 1, .5 per TU to maintain level 2, 1 per TU to maintain level 3.

[Andres]

There's still the problem that it would make the MBB too expensive in terms of Focus to use. By how you put it, I'd have to spend 3(initial charge)+0.2*5(maintenance)+3(charge to level 2)+0.5*5(level 2 maintenance)+0.5(MBB)=10 exertion and I'd have to wait 3 turns to fire it.
Here's some adjustments I've made:

Name: Manticore Gauntlet
Inventor: Pree
Appearance: An orb of energy that covers the entire hand.
Type: Ki
Charge Time: 5 per Charge Level
Effects: There are three Charge Levels for this technique.
Charge Level 1 deals no damage on its own but allows access to the Manticore Bullet Barrage.
Charge Level 2 deals 0.5 damage in melee strike damage but breaks when used as such. Multiplies Manticore Bullet Barrage damage by 1.2
Charge Level 3 does not break on strike and doubles the damage of the Manticore Bullet Barrage.
Exertion: 1 to create, 0.2 per 5 TU to maintain level 1; 1.5 to create, 0.6 per 5 TU to maintain level 2; 1.5 to create, 1 per 5 TU to maintain level 3.

The primary purpose of the Manticore Gauntlet is to allow for the Manticore Bullet Barrage - an equivalent to Continuous Energy Bullets that takes longer and costs more to set up but costs less after sustained use. If it costs me 0.2*5 per round for the gauntlet and then another .5 for the Manticore Bullet Barrage, I'd be spending 1.5 exertion per turn firing it plus I'd have to spend the initial costs and charge time to make the gauntlet, so it would basically be Continuous Energy Bullets except with a higher exertion cost and charge time. Therefore, I knocked it down so it costs 0.2 per 5 TU, rather than per 1 TU.

This is how it would operate under my new design:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Continuous Energy Bullets
Per round: 1 TU charge time, 1.5 exertion, 1 damage
Round 1: 1 TU charge time, 1.5 exertion, 1 damage
Round 2: 2 TU charge time, 3 exertion, 2 damage
Round 3: 3 TU charge time, 4.5 exertion, 3 damage
Round 4: 4 TU charge time, 6 exertion, 4 damage
Round 5: 5 TU charge time, 7.5 exertion, 5 damage
Manticore Gauntlet/Bullet Barrage
Round 1: 5 TU charge time, 1 exertion, 0 damage
Round 2: 0 TU charge time (special rule, can be 1 TU if you want), 0.2 exertion (Gauntlet maintenance) +0.5 exertion (MBB), 1 damage
Total: 5 TU charge time, 1.7 exertion, 1 damage
Round 3: 0.2 exertion (Gauntlet maintenance) +0.5 exertion (MBB), 1 damage
Total: 5 TU charge time, 3.4 exertion, 2 damage
Third total (Round 4): 5 TU charge time, 4.1 exertion, 3 damage
Round 5 (Total): 5 TU charge time, 4.8 exertion, 4 damage

This accomplishes the techniques' goals of replicating Continuous Energy Bullets at a higher cost to start up but paying off after a few rounds. The Manticore Gauntlets' melee capabilities were an afterthought when I originally designed it. Maybe I should get rid of them completely and replace them with a different skill later on, in-game?

[BlitzDungeoneer]

So, Zan? Is this still on?