Combine my spoons and make an axe.
[1] BY THE POWER OF SPOONS! I DECLARE THIS THE AXE OF SPOONING! Wait, you tied them on wrong, now you have a stick with a spoon tied to either end... In shame over your repeated failures, you commit Seppuku with your double headed spoon. It is extraordinarily painful and takes most of the week.
I Start the Heck out of that Cult and hope that this is a Gods Need Prayer Badly Setting
[3] You get the cult together and they start worshipping you. You soon discover that this is not in fact a "Gods need prayer badly" situation and you are still just a dude with people pretending he's a god... You're not even sure if they are honestly think you're a god incarnate or if they're just making fun of you.
Ask Paul to give me a mission to help him. I shall be a vassal of our great lord paul
[1] On the way to ask Paul to give you a mission you find a hot dog stand. You choke on the hot dog and die. Again. You are now a ghost-ghost, you can only manipulate ghostly objects and are invisible to the living while being translucent to ghosts.
Wait a minute, was their another inquisitor on the fleet?
[3] Yes, Lord Felgraad was leading this fleet before you called them in. He's known to be a bit incompetent, but he's not been driven mad by the chaos like you.
Ride Generally Me like a mechanical bull.
[4] You climb onto the Antipineapple's back and ride it like a mechanical bull. The smooth nubs where he would have spines feels a bit weird against your backside. Also, he's as big as a normal pineapple so it's a bit hard to stay on.
Realize that, If I am Generally me, then that means he is either also dead, I am also alive, or we are both Schrödinger's cat except human.
[5] You come to the shocking realization that NOTHING MAKES SENSE ANYMORE!!! Well, actually you realize that ghostlyness is a type of living since you can still interact with the living world through poltergeisting and whispering to the living so technically you are still alive, you just misplaced your body...
Take a large bite out of Paul then wait for nature to take its course.
[1] You try to bite Paul with all your antipineapply/ghostly might. You quickly realize this was a bad idea once the spines start digging into your/Sl4cker's digestive track. Sl4cker, of course, is the one that feels the pain. You then realize that you just touched Paul with Laup's body. There's not enough left to fill a teacup.
Take a large bite out of Paul then wait for nature to take its course.
STOP THIS MAD MAN!
[6] You push another ghost into pushing a brick between Laup's body and Paul, and Generally Me eats a brick instead of Paul. The exertion kills your ghostly ghost form and you come back and a ghost's ghost's ghost. Ghost. The world's not destroyed, but Sl4cker still gets all the fun of having gravel in his bowels.
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Topic: Don't eat the pineapple minimalist RTD - Revenge of the meta (Read 46386 times)