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[Neonivek]

I know but my Father's side is very exclusively German. While my Mother's side might as well be Europe.

[Urist McScoopbeard]

Well. You can always just snort the alcohol.

WARNING: Scoopbeard does not in any way endorse the snorting of alcohol.

[Flying Dice]

Bit late to the party here (heh), but screwdrivers. Screwdrivers all day long. Shot of vodka (or three) in a tumbler of orange juice. It's the same principle as most fruity cocktails with the added benefit of not being painfully expensive, not requiring you to learn anything to make them, and not tasting like ick. Make sure to use good vodka (by which I mean either good or really bad¹, depending on the state of your wallet and liver) though, drinking something like Smirnoff will get you mocked and rightly so.

1. I'm kidding though, if you have a hard time with beer then cheap liquor will make you want to die regardless of what you mix it with. If it burns your skin, don't put it in.

[Vattic]

The colder it is the less it will taste. It's why a lot of whiskey connoisseurs baulk at adding ice instead of water. If you chill a reasonable quality vodka it's not unlike cold water.

Ultimately you will likely get used to the flavour with time. I did back when I was drinking once a week, but it's been so long it tastes foul again.

Well. You can always just snort the alcohol.

WARNING: Scoopbeard does not in any way endorse the snorting of alcohol.

A legitimate option if you can get or make powdered alcohol. Doubt any bar owner would be best pleased.

[Zrk2]

Well. You can always just snort the alcohol.

WARNING: Scoopbeard does not in any way endorse the snorting of alcohol.

No no no, those are stimulants, not depressives.

Anyway, I second the cider, and once you're hammed nothing tastes like alcohol.

[Flying Dice]

Mm, yeah, that's a good point with the cider. Gotta be careful, though, if it's cheap stuff or high ABV you'll still taste it pretty easily.

[symonthewise]

As you say you are canadian, if you are in ontario I know for a fact you can get your hands on this german grapefrut thing at our lovely alcohol overlords http://www.lcbo.com/lcbo/product/stiegl-grapefruit-radler/334052#.VRI5A_nF-So

2.5 percent! Delicious and tastes mostly like grapefruit juice. Still if your stomach hurts you may be one of these people with genetically low levels of the enzyme which digests ethanol. If that's the case you can either give up drink or undergo a rocky-esque training montage that, far from running up and down stairs and trudging through snow, will find you sitting nearly immobile typing vitriol at strangers or stumbling delightfully along some forgotten alleyway to eventually find a convenient waste bin to piss on.

 

[sackhead]

i second the cider i'd also suggest sweat wines like asti or something 

[Bauglir]

You got somethin' against asti?

[Lord_lemonpie]

I'm not an expert on alcoholic drinks, but I've had Alasia (Moscato d'Asti) several times, which does not taste like alcohol at all (in my opinion at least).

[NAV]

As you say you are canadian, if you are in ontario I know for a fact you can get your hands on this german grapefrut thing at our lovely alcohol overlords http://www.lcbo.com/lcbo/product/stiegl-grapefruit-radler/334052#.VRI5A_nF-So

The grapefruit radler is delicious. My girlfriend and sister (who both hate beer) love it.

[Naryar]

It has to do with the overwhelmingly bad taste of beer (well for me) that I can't even force down without gagging.

There's proper, good beer and then there's marketed dog piss. You probably had the second.

Though beer is an acquired taste, yes.

[Urist McScoopbeard]

Of large brewery beer down here in the US, I do believe Yuengling is the highest quality, and indeed the best. Otherwise, look for smaller places. A lot of microbrewery types of places have heavily flavored beers that might suit you more. Worse case scenario go to the Czech Republic.

[Flying Dice]

It has to do with the overwhelmingly bad taste of beer (well for me) that I can't even force down without gagging.

There's proper, good beer and then there's marketed dog piss. You probably had the second.

Though beer is an acquired taste, yes.

Or if you want alcohol that really doesn't taste of alcohol, just do the obvious thing and drink any well-known American light beer since they're all basically water anyways.

[Lord_lemonpie]

It has to do with the overwhelmingly bad taste of beer (well for me) that I can't even force down without gagging.

There's proper, good beer and then there's marketed dog piss. You probably had the second.

Though beer is an acquired taste, yes.

Or if you want alcohol that really doesn't taste of alcohol, just do the obvious thing and drink any well-known American light beer since they're all basically water anyways.

Apply cold water american beer to burned area