Happy the clown: recruit
[1] His hijinks end up getting on some people's bad side. Apparently hiding razor blades in those cream pies was a bad move. (+25 inquisitors)
Happy's unconverted cult: Have a bake sale!
[1] They give away all their haunted cookies and get nothing in return! (Lose haunted cookies)
Necrochefs: bake zombrownies!
[2] They don't have any ingredients! Curses! They spend the turn at the grocery store instead of in the kitchen.
Grotesque: try to eat some humans
[2] Grotesque is too slow and ends up starving to death. (Grotesque takes damage from hunger, Grotesque dies)
End of turn 14.
Big Ol' Fire (uninjured): (-1 APPEAL FOR [1] TURNS)
cult (drunk [1]): 300 cultists, 100 fanatics, 500 martial arts masters, 400 ecologists, 50 chosen martial arts masters
items: dragon blood, Orb of Stalwart 2
Base (Apartments): abandoned neighborhood
Diplomacy: Savior-esque PR (Has humanity's aid), offering martial arts training (increases PR), owed a favor by Speedo
inquisitors: 700 eco inquisitors, 25 wealthy inquisitors
Volker-hands: Curses, this won't do at all!
cult: 265 cultists, 50 injured cultists, 100 marksmen
items: dragon blood, glass, firearms, quicksilver, silver
Rituals: Create Fake orb of Stalwart [req glass, silver; use causes weakness]
Base (sturdy fortress):
Diplomacy: good PR
inquisitors: 115 inquisitors
Dar Gold (uninjured): [SEVERELY DEHYDRATED - growth effects nullified until fixed, no additional growth until fixed]
Growths: Leaves (reduce hunger passively), fruit-bearing branches
cult: 50 large drones
Items: dragon blood
Rituals: Basic horticulture
Base(clearing): Walls around Seed 1
Diplomacy: excellent PR
inquisitors:
-Seed 1(undamaged): sprawling tendrils, Slight growth, slightly hungry, leaves
Quar-splosion man (uninjured):
cult: 100 scholars, 26 cultists, 1 Leg n dairy scholar (50% chance of turning 2 into 3 on dairy or leg related rolls)
Items: located dragons, Orb of Stalwart 4, dragon blood
Rituals: Popularity ritual (no requirements), Air bubble ritual [req soap]
Diplomacy: excellent PR, BOF no longer open to OoS related negotiations
inquisitors: 51 inquisitors, 50 scholars
+Quaken (uninjured): Has tagged Quarken with 4 damage worth of feathers
Arcing Mist-elf: (PSISHOCK - NO ABILITIES FOR [3] TURNS)
cult (High morale): 100 cultists, 5 hecklers (negate leadership bonuses), 1 mad weak esper, 2 necromancers, 440 beasts, 100 large beasts, 30 satyrs, 25 minotaurs, 20 centaurs, 5 centaur scouts, 5 battle commanders (50% chance to reroll negative outcomes in combat they initiate), 2 leaders (50% chance of turning 3 into 4), 2 disaster averters (50% chance of turning 1 into 2)
Items: dragonblood, Necronomicon, Improvised melee weapons, 25 Daragon fruit, spearmint
Rituals: Summon mini-horror [req dragon blood], create Summoning Shell [req Zinc, wood; single use], Imbue knowledge [consumes Daragon's fruit], Stalwart burning summon [consumes Orb of Stalwart, gives summoned crippling weakness], brew power potion [consumes dragon blood, damages user], Cure Psishock [req aspirin]
Diplomacy: excellent PR, Allies with Happy
inquisitors: 100 beasts
-Sharkon (uninjured): Submerged
-Beldroth (uninjured): Adult (+1 physique, +1 power)
-Some scrub fish (lightly injured): suffocating
Hon Shadow (uninjured): Yes! Influence!
cult: 115 skilled engineers support of Pope, cult in Washington DC
Items: dragonblood, cotton
Base (Clearing): Stick fence
Diplomacy: Savior-esque PR (humanity's aid gained), support of president, support of Virginia, support of Florida
inquisitors:
-Unlight: Let the light guide you!
-Pope: popular
Speedy Speedoman (uninjured):
cult (drunk [1]): 258 cultists, 50 cultists (guarding) 22 happy chaos magi, 5 skilled leaders (50% chance of 3 becoming 4)
Items: partially gathered dragonblood, Orb of Stalwart 5 (GUARDED), firearms, rough armor, 50 healing potions
Rituals: Create Healing Brew (req dragonblood)
Base (generic building): Punji pits and barbed wire defenses, strong community, housing
Diplomacy: good PR, allowing others to use Orb of Stalwart (improves PR when used), owe BOF and Zomboss a favor, friends with Mooney
inquisitors: 25 inquisitors
-Leader #1: Paranoid (50% chance of turning 5 into 6 on guard)
-Leader #2 (m): passively restores morale
-Leader #4 (f): marksman
-Mr. Banana hammock: 50 cultists
Zomboss with really long name (uninjured):
cult: 100 cultists, 100 drunks, 10 brewmasters (can serve booze to increase cultist strength), 40 distillers, 25 hillbillies (can brew high-alcohol moonshine)
Items: Stagnant orb, improvised melee weapons, dragon blood
Rituals: Salmoning ritual [req stagnant orb and dragon blood]
Base (Grand Mausoleum): bunker, bar (now with better taste), still
Diplomacy: good PR, friendly with BOF and Speedo, owed a favor by Speedo
inquisitors: 25 eco inquisitors
-Mooney the thirsty (uninjured):
---- NPC factions
Jail: 25 hillbillies (can brew high-alcohol moonshine) [Zomboss], Leader #5: lazy, loves casual games [Speedo]
Happy the Clown's legion:
Cult: 150 cultists, 35 necrochefs, 125 mad necrochefs
Diplomacy: Allies with Archon
Items: Necronomnomnomicon
Inquisitors: 50 inquisitors
World details:
-Orb of Stalwarts 1 and 3 destroyed
((At this rate I might have to have NPCs start targeting Archon just to cull some of the variety in his cult so it's easier to read))