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[FallacyofUrist]

((Is turn eight done? By the way I might collect storm orbs.))

[Aslandus]

((Is turn eight done? By the way I might collect storm orbs.))

Hell no, but I need to finish doing all these actions and wanted to take a break after losing about three people's actions from my computer crashing.

[InsaneRationalist]

((Maybe you guys should stop posting their commands before the actions for the turn are done, it was fine when there were 3 or 4 people playing but now a lot happens within a turn and when you post new commands I can't tell which commands I'm supposed to be using))

Sorry about that; I have been worried about missing a turn if I could not get back to the computer soon enough.

((Sorry guys, my computer just crashed and these are all the commands I could salvage. I'll have to reroll and rewrite the rest.))

My condolences.

[Aslandus]

Improve PR.
Cultists: Search for the artifacts.

PR: [4] You manage to get people back on your side after all this time. (now PR is good)
search: [irrelevant] all your nothing searches and finds nothing.
Crux: FIREWORKS! ALL THE FIREWORKS!!!
[7][2]=carp's cultists (plane faction) are targeted
[5] Massive explosions rend them apart. Well, they don't need to paint the plane faction's headquarters now... assuming they like blood-rust brown... (-70 cultists, -10 jester cultists)
GYUAHAHAHAHAA!!!

Inquisitors: find some cool stuff to use against TW
[2] Nope, no cool stuff here.

Okay, first of all. we need Trog down first and foremost; he has the lead in terms of firepower...

So we'll just have to fight fire with fire.

50 cultists: Try to summon one of my siblings! If Trogdor wants a fight with the gods, He shall have it! Find the last Orb now!
Me: Give 75 cultists the power of the dead!
75 dudes: If you are currently beings of pure darkness and death, murder Rosabel's cultists! If not, use the money to bribe the military into blowing Trogdor up.
Pew pew crew: Guard the base!
Assassins: Find out how to do the banishing ritual, at all costs. What I am saying is kidnap Unescargot's cultists and torture them until they give information.
50 cultists: If 75 dudes are now using the power of the dead, bribe the military into blowing Trogdor up. If they are not, Recruit people!

Orb: [1] They walk over to where they think the orb is and never come back. (-50 cultists)
Give power: [2] You can't muster your link the death enough to grant the power, they'll have to stay mundies for now...
bribe: [1] Turns out the military doesn't take bribes, nor do they appreciate the insinuation that they do. Who knew? (-75 cultists)
Guard: [5] They do an excellent job standing guard over the base, if anyone wants to get in they'll have to go through these guys. (25 badass dudes guarding)
research: [3] They "convince" one of Unescagot's cultists to tell them the ritual they'd found. Surprisingly, they tell the ritual before the torture starts. Your cultists release them without incident since they were so helpful. (learned "banishing" ritual)
recroot: [2] All by ourselves... fighting wars, all by ourselves!

Turn 8 actions:

Koshu: if at any time Koshu is summoned (or otherwise ends up on or near Earth) grab Rosabel and Rabe (if present) and ascend to at least a kilometer away from the ground. If things have not gone so badly wrong that gaining altitude consumes Koshu's action for the turn, send flaying storms of telekinetic glass, rock and metal at anything that looks both hostile and capable of flight, high jumps or ranged attacks.

80 empowered cultists: research cascade ritual, knowing my luck we will likely need it. If anyone attacks or harrasses you, call the cops.

150 cultists: get dragon blood. Do not eat it.

312 cultists: assist Rabe's 125 cultists and (I think?) Rosabel's all but 50 cultists in stealing the Orb of Stalwart. Then guard the Orb of Stalwart to prevent anyone from destroying it. Alternatively, if Unescargot changes their mind about attacking us, do not bother stealing it and just assist Unescargot, Rabe, and Rosabel in securing and guarding it.

150 cultists: summon me.

Koshu: [5] That'll be great when you actually do it.
Research: [3] They find some references to it, apparently it takes <equivalent time of 3 turns> to perform and requires at least 100 cultists to perform, and they must devote their undivided attention to it or it will dissipate. They can't find anything more about it, not even what materials to perform it, maybe in the library of the next town... (partially researched cascade)
dragon blood: [1] good news: they resist the urge to drink dragon blood. Bad news: they didn't find any dragon blood. Also bad news: Several of them are terrified of all the danger this cult is facing and flee for their lives. (-50 cultists)
Grand theft Orb: [2] "Huh? Where's the orb again? I don't remember seeing any orb but that one we used to summon you..."
sommunz: [irrelevant] You can't do the ritual now, not only do you not have the materials but there aren't enough hours left in the day to set up, it needs the whole turn to perform so you have to have all the materials one turn before.

Inquisitorz: arm yeselves
[4] They find a weapons cache from the military. The cases are a bit rusted so they are probably abandoned. Oh well, good enough for them! (250 inquisitors armed)

[FallacyofUrist]

((It occurs to me that I can summon myself, but nobody else can. I am now the Target, and I am targeted to a degree equal to that of the Target from the Warrens. Well crud.))

[Adragis]

((the cascade is not a valid option unless I can TORNADO everybody. I think I need to diplomacy my way outta this one.))

[Aslandus]

((Maybe you guys should stop posting their commands before the actions for the turn are done, it was fine when there were 3 or 4 people playing but now a lot happens within a turn and when you post new commands I can't tell which commands I'm supposed to be using))

Sorry about that; I have been worried about missing a turn if I could not get back to the computer soon enough.

Sorry, I usually try to give at least day or two for last actions (if we haven't had all players submit yet) before ending a turn so you don't have to worry about missing it because you were sleeping or something.

That said, so far you guys have been on top of the actions pretty well so I haven't had to skip anyone this game, but between the banter and the "late" changes to actions it can get difficult to keep things straight, especially when people are just posting that they want to make a change and not editing their actions... (I told off Evonix about it and then FallacyofUrist and Adragis did the same thing >.<)

[Adragis]

I blame the spirit of Rosabel!

[Evonix]

I think I missed something, where did crux come from?

[FallacyofUrist]

((Mind control mask found in a carnival or something. I'll post actions once Mr. Aslandus posts the turn summary. Unless the turn isn't over.))

[Aslandus]

Humanity:
Attack TROG:
[5] They fire missiles and artillery on your position. Your natural toughness protects you some, but it's not enough to prevent the damage (TROG now heavily wounded)

Attack CARP's cult: (since you haven't been summoned)
[1] They have massive logistical failure and can't get to your cult.

End of Turn 8.
score:
Unescargot: 170 cultists, 5 high morale empowered wealthy cultists, 5 annoyed empowered wealthy cultists, 8 cultists in high places, 3 veterans, professional journalist hirelings, has a fortress with malevolent architecture, secured Orb of Stalwart 2, has dragon blood, host of ihatecarp.com, knows ritual of fading strength, knows "banishing" ritual, 10 inquisitors in high places, 60 inquisitors

Tavern wench: well known, good PR, 80 well trained inquisitors, 50 lightly armed inquisitors, 5 inquisitors in high places, inquisitors active
-Crux the mad: nothing

TROG (heavily wounded): summoned, afflicted with 10 plagues of egypt (10), 100 anarchist cultists, has dragon blood, despised by humanity
-GORT(uninjured): 75 mummies
-KONG(Lightly wounded): nothing

Anthaju(uninjured): summoned, 50 cultists, 25 armed trained cultists (guarding base), 75 assassin cultists, has a pyramid with a shoddy shack on top for a base, has dragon blood, allies with Rabe via diplomatic power, has weighed Unescargot and TROG, knows "banishing" ritual, destroyed Orb of Stalwart 4, has money, 5 slow strong mummy inquisitors

Koshu: 562 cultists, 80 empowered cultists, has a tool shed base with excellent defences, very bad PR, partially researched cascade, satellite launched, has a few spaceship components, 250 armed inquisitors, inquisitors activated

Rabe (uninjured): summoned, 250 cultists, 40 recognizable cultists, 10 cultists in high places, has sturdy base, metal recycler and shaper set up, KI website and company set up, posters put up, campaign for president started, has a bunch of metal, has bricks and concrete, has a bunch of molds/casts for stuff (weapons are the important ones), destroyed Orb of Stalwart 1, second in command to carp's faction, 65 inquisitors, 20 jailed inquisitors, inquisitors activated

DF CARP: 90 cultists divided into 3 2 factions, 25 armed cultists (final faction), 10 armored cultists (final faction), 10 depressed cultists (glub faction), has a bunch of fish, has turned into a DF carp (it's what you always dreamed of), has dragon blood, destroyed the focus stone, going crazy, detested by humanity, 22 inquisitors, inquisitors have mustard gas, inquisitors active, inquisitors destroyed Orbs of Stalwart 3 and 5

Rosabel: 145 cultists, 50 cultists with cancer, 100 slightly healthier cultists, tornado minion (3), good PR, has dragon blood, has humanity's sympathy, 172 inquisitors, inquisitors activated, inquisitors have destroyed Orb of Storms 1

Other: Poison widely available

[wipeout1024]

Recruit.

[FallacyofUrist]

Ha!
120 cultists: Summon me!
Me: Be summoned!
50 cultists: Hide in various nooks and hidden places, whatnot, and ambush any enemies who enter my fortress.
3 veteran cultists: Do so as well.
10 wealthy cultists: Hire armed security guards to prevent any enemies from entering my fortress.
8 cultists in high places: Recruit more inquisitors to attack Koshu. Use bad PR to help with this.
Journalist hirelings: Write articles about Trog, recruiting inquisitors to attack him.
That should be everyone, but anyone I may have forgotten: Spread sudoku books through Koshu's base.


((I'm going to be assaulted now aren't I.))

[Aslandus]

Recruit.

[1] It seems after the whole "crazy beer" fiasco people aren't too hyped for joining you. They love fighting against you though, which is weird given how you're generally considered a pretty cool horror. (+30 inquisitors)
Crux: Party time, Everybody!
[9] He targets the planet Earth itself, more precisely [2] the people on the planet
[5] He summons a huge storm that wipes out 10% of Earth's population (that's about 700 million people btw, "far more than anyone has killed so far" would be a bit of an understatement). If this keeps up there won't be much left to conquer by the end. (10% of Earth's population destroyed)
WHEEE!

Inquisitors: slay Crux the mad, this destruction cannot continue!
[4] Crux is helpless to defend himself against the combined might of the inquisitors with their weapons and training. Apparently that mask makes his skin pretty damn thick though (Crux mortally wounded)

Ha!
120 cultists: Summon me!
Me: Be summoned!
50 cultists: Hide in various nooks and hidden places, whatnot, and ambush any enemies who enter my fortress.
3 veteran cultists: Do so as well.
10 wealthy cultists: Hire armed security guards to prevent any enemies from entering my fortress.
8 cultists in high places: Recruit more inquisitors to attack Koshu. Use bad PR to help with this.
Journalist hirelings: Write articles about Trog, recruiting inquisitors to attack him.
That should be everyone, but anyone I may have forgotten: Spread sudoku books through Koshu's base.


((I'm going to be assaulted now aren't I.))

((Probs))
Summons: [5] You get summoned without incident, and also find this chap clinging to your coat cloudtails:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Name: Puff Puff the magic cloud

abilities:
-Spread hallucinogenic powder through the immediate area causing bizzare things to appear before even the mightiest of people or horrors. Some swear it can give useful visions, but mostly it's just flying pink gophers.
-Adorable, no gameplay effects but it's true

Appearance: a pinkish cloud that seems to fly around like an excited puppy with wings. It seems to respond to commands like one too. Are we sure this thing is sentient?

Homeworld: Cotton candy world. It's not really cotton candy, but the native cloud people don't eat so they can't tell.

Skills:
-Presence: 5 (That dust man, it'll mess stuff up)
-Mindlock: 0 (no mind, well not a sapient one it seems, still takes orders though)
-Power: 0 (It doesn't do anything besides fly around and make people trip out)
-Physique: -1 (literally has no physical form, as such it immediately dissipates on being attacked but comes back together on the next turn)
-appeal: 0 (No communication ability, it just flies around)

A nice strong breathe will send him back to his homeworld if you don't want him.
Ambush guarding: [3] They get ready to ambush comers, but there's not enough cover to prepare ambushes at all the entrances. Invaders could probably sneak in if they were lucky. (50 cultists and 3 veterans guarding in ambush poorly)
More hirelings! All ze hirelings!: [3] They hire some security, and those guys will help guard, but they're only mercenary and won't stick around past the beginning of your next turn. (Mercenary guards guarding)
Recruiting against the enemy: [1] Hmm, perhaps this is the wrong forum... (Koshu gains 40 cultists, Trog gains 25 cultists) ((Not sure what the journalists' recruiting power should be))

[Evonix]

150 Cultists(get cloud guys inquisitors to help): Attack cloud's minions before the ritual can complete and steal the orb.(Beg, bribe, seduce, steal, buy, conquer, forge certificate of ownership, ask nicely or remake the timeline with your time machine so we always had a time machine from a passing 5D anteater, time lord, time knight, time peon, time craftsman, Chronosian guard member, Chronosian guard, Chronosian guard fugitive, Chronosian, time tourist, mine turtle, or misc ameture time traveler if you are too late.)
50 Cultists: Turn on and monitor the smelter, make molds for armor and missiles (and use them)if you have the time.
50 Cultists+recognisable cultists and cultists in high places and me: Recrute.