Such betrayal! Such a misuse of my gift! I gave you life, and you seek to end mine? This world makes me sick.
Me: Weigh the souls of the traitorous scum! I am certain they will find themselves regretting their decision.
Armed guys: Train yourselves in the use of these weapons; they seem complicated to use.
100 dudes: Make friends with the kitten! Not all might want to live in the desert, regrettably. As such, I need someone to be the face of my cult; someone that handles foreign affairs and the like, as you lot don't seem to be able to.
75 persons: Go hunt for the dragon blood! And understand that the desert really isn't a place where they would be likely to bloom!
Leftovers: Spread good word about me on this magical "internet" place.
Weighing souls: [5] You weigh their souls. Their souls are some of the heaviest you've felt in a long time, and it wouldn't be surprising if these chaps had been stuck in the lowest part of your favorite afterlife until they were resurrected. Maybe bringing them here wasn't such a good idea. You make their bodies match their souls (mummy inquisitors now extremely heavy and slow)
cultists:
training: [4] They train with their new weaponry and are confident they can fend off most threats they come across now. They might even be able to deal some damage to a colossal monster if they have to. (armed cultists trained)
diplomacy: [5] They make such a convincing argument that Rabe is compelled to help you in the future (allies with Rabe)
gathering: [5] They find a bunch of the toxic plant and distill some extra dragon blood, they could use this to... remove some of the troublesome people they meet (gained dragon blood, 75 cultists now assassins)
internetery: [2] Dammit, they can't get the wifi working.
Altered for changed command
[5] You and your followers recruit excellently, bringing people who will likely help you onto your side. Some of them have technical knowledge, but it's not really that remarkable a feature (+300 cultists).
((Thats 375 cultists total, correct?))
Turn 4:
Koshu and 100 cultists: build and (using Koshu's telekinesis) launch a small communications satellite, à la Sputnik-1.
75 cultists: improve PR. If the satellite launch is successful, use that to improve PR.
175 cultists: recruit.
25 cultists: politely ask for stone from inquisitors
then I will weigh the soul of the... Tavern Wench.
It occurs to me to point out that Koshu's soul is:
1. due to telekinesis effectively weightless,
2. in another dimension entirely,
3. prone to causing flaying storms of glass (sand is made of glass) when threatened.
Come to think of it, #2 applies to all not-yet-summoned horrors, so that probably wouldn't have worked anyway.
((Souls are a weird issue, I would probably let him do it but it wouldn't accomplish anything until she'd been summoned))
Satellite: [5] You're not technically close enough to do anything(weakened with distance + being in another dimension) but you offer moral support as your cultists build and launch the satellite into orbit with a huge slingshot they found (Satellite built and launched with no problems, cultists feeling empowered)
PR: [6] They shout over the radio about how awesome you are. It gets rather grating rather fast. (PR mixed)
recruiting: [3] They manage to get some people to join, but they got a rather sparse part of town today and didn't get as many as they planned to (+100 cultists)
solicitation: [5] The inquisitors are hesitant at first but your cultists insist that once they get their space program running properly they will use it to fight CARP (gained focusing stone from inquisitors)
Try to convince the inquisitors to leave us in peace, as the Tavern Wench is benevolent.
Cultists in high places: Talk about the need for free beer, and keeping bars open till early morning.
Recognisable cultists: Start an awareness campaign about the need for healthy food.
All other cultists: Be the campaign team for the cultists in high places, and get out the word of the Alcohol Party, and of the Tavern Wench.
Begging for mercy: [2] They don't seem to be buying it.
cultists:
politics: [4] The campaigns and speeches go off without a hitch. Your PR gets better. You have the party-lovers' votes. (PR is good, more well known)
Inquisitors: Draw attention to flaws in campaign[5] They expertly point out that beer and Leg O' Lamb aren't exactly healthy and that most bars are open in "early" mornings at 1 to 2 am already, they just close for the "later" morning when people are actually waking up. They also bring up several points about the recent bouts of liver failure and refer to the medical reports saying that they had died of alcohol poisoning. All in all, they lambast your political wing and leave you picking up the pieces. A few of the inquisitors even get some fame for it. (PR is moderately bad, 5 inquisitors are now in high places)
Turn 4?:
Curses.
Lightly chasten those 50 followers for their failure. Still, I suppose it wasn't their fault. I will allow them to attempt redemption.
50 cultists: Attempt to get my PR back up again.
Another 50 cultists: continue recruiting.
100 cultists, look for an 'Orb of Stalwart'.
RAGE: [1] YOUR RIGHTEOUS FURY IS UNRIVALED! YOU STRIKE THEM DOWN WHERE THEY STAND FOR THEIR INSOLENCE! YOU USE YOUR HEALING POWER TO MEND THE TUMOROUS CELLS IN THEIR BODIES! (50 cultists now have cancer)
cultists:
PR: [5] They do an excellent job of mending your lackluster reputation. Thank goodness, you wouldn't want to come to a world where you get death threats every day would you? (PR now good)
recruit: [6] They spread the word about the great Smiley and her magical healing power and coat of many colors (they made that part up). Unfortunately not all people agree with them and some even join the hate crew. (+50 cultists, +30 inquisitors)
gather: [5] They find an Orb of Stalwart and an Orb of Storms. Why would someone as peaceful as you want to summon hurricanes? Well, I think you'll find that the bigger a storm, the fewer the problems it can't solve. (Found Orb of Stalwart 4 and Orb of Storms 1)
Turn four : (because people are posting that now) THIS IS OUTDATED Me ask people in poor countries if they have seen a large quartz sphere tell them I will give them carp if they tell me.
Carp: flail around comically to raise moral of cultists.
10 cultist: study why carp flailing is so funny with your new-found knowledge become jester cultist.
30 cultists: search for for dragon's blood flee and record the place if people start drinking it if not bring it back.
30 cultists: design saddles for giant carp about 2 meters and a half long.
5 cultist and half of any cultists gained in turn 3: start a smear campaign against ihatecarp.com say they are just jealous of all this free carp.
Half of any cultists gained in turn 3: found the extradimensional carp party and run for president wherever rabe is running for president.
Outdated? Then post the thing you want to do.
Me: Ask if TROG'S cultist's would rather follow a kitten than a gorilla cockroach thing... promise better retirement benefits than being killed horribly.
Kitten party: Try again, talk about K.I.(Kitten Industries) and how they'r recycling and making jobs.
50 cultists: Create a sign up booth near the posters for K.I. now that the students have had time to warm up to me ("K.I. is just starting out and we need strong people with strong minds(Some people should be setting up a place to start up,"should".).").
70 Cultists: Build a base near the scrap heap.
50 Cultists: Look for orb of stalwart and if they find it hire a moving van to bring it back.
30 Cultists: Get materials for a solar forge (Lot's of mirrors focus sunlight to melt metal.).
Koshu I think an alliance would be beneficial, I'm also interested in space travel and I can send some help if you need it.
Hijacking cultists: [2] You can't seem to reach any of them, their primitive brains are clearly not evolved enough to appreciate the glory of catdom.
Politics: [5] They manage to make an impression on people and despite the fact that Kitten Industries doesn't exist because you never made it, people are ready to invest in your franchise.
recruiting: [2] Where is everybody? Oh dammit, these must be those annoying students that actually look things up and realized Kitten Industries doesn't exist.
base building: [5] They build a solid bunker out of concrete they got from the hardware store and metal, and it looks like it could withstand a few bombs. Of course, it's not indestructable, but you could probably hole up there for a week or so without worrying about break-ins. Whatever this quick-dry concrete they got is, you might want to get more of it. (Sturdy base built)
Orb hunt: [4] They find an Orb of Stalwart, but there's no time to bring it back so they just note where it is (found Orb of Stalwart 5)
Magic workshop: [3] They manage to get some materials for a regular forge, like brick and concrete, but your more technically minded minions tell you that a solar forge wouldn't really work without some EXTREMELY strong light, the sunlight filtered through Earth's atmosphere ain't gonna cut it. (gained bricks and concrete)
((I'll come back in a bit to roll for the next few actions, this is a lot of stuff to go through))
Author
Topic: RTD horrors (Read 233058 times)