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[Aslandus]

So in summary, we have a mass of clouds, an alcoholic, a cockroach gorilla crusher thingy, a mummy jackal cat thing, a magic crystal thing, and a kitten. Also possibly a carp. This will be fun.

All we need is a monster made of hamburger meat and a talking grapefruit and we've got ourselves a fun kids show.
Or alternatively:
Business as usual in RTD horrors

[Aslandus]

Nightmare's cult remains in the shadows... waiting... Not in their flooded cave, but in other places...

End of Epilogue 1.
score:
Nightmare(DEAD) - 150 cultists, 8 assassin cultists, flooded cave base with flame thrower defenses, 16 inquisitors, inquisitors active, inquisitors have missiles, secured Orb of Stalwart 1, has plushies, glorious presence, has been summoned,  plushies distributed, plushie market flooded, plushie warehouse literally flooded
Carl Yelvin(SUPER DEAD) - 198 cultists, 5 unconscious chosen, dragon blood, access to Orb of Stalwart 3, access to orb of Stalwart 4, access to orb of stalwart 5, summoned, 8 steel golems, abandoned warehouse base
Plauge Doctor(SQUASHED INTO A FINE JELLY... ALSO DEAD) - 25 armed cultists, 20 antimedicine  cultists, inquisitors can treat plague victims, access to Orb of Stalwart 2, has dragon blood, Jeff (DEAD), has been summoned, inquisitors active, 150 civilians dead of disease, least hated by Lucifer, friends with Giant Paul, 100 Jeff's cultists, hated by humanity
Mad matron(DEAD) - 50 cultists (guarding the remains), 5 cultists, access to Orb of Stalwart 2, has dragon blood, has been summoned, has nerve gas, loved by humans, Giant Paul, 40 armed Paul's cultists, 50 Paul's cultists, has found Nightmare's base, Lucifer w/ Shadowbane and angelic armor (DEAD), 5 Lucifer's chosen (Joined Paul)
Other: existence of horrors poorly revealed (in spite of the inquisitors' efforts and CY's reckless exposing of his summoned beasts)

[Evonix]

FINE...  I mean how bad can it be? It's not like they're going to try to move a multi ton boulder by hand, or get confused about where a bullet comes out of a gun, I mean no species is THAT stupid...      I hope

yes there is a species that stupid it's called humans may i refer you to the darwin awards and Arkansas (pronounced Ar-kin-saw)  where it is illegal to mispronounce the states name even though it isn't enforced at some point someone that that it would be a good idea to make that a law. and more importantly half the internet.

I did, I prayed to myself that it was just an overly elaborate joke.

[carp]

Esivous happens to hate carp. They are a major nuisance in his home world.

well maybe if I turn enough of their homeworld into carp they'll scream in terror then i'll pop into their sky every so often.

[UnicodingUnicorn]

((Oops, thought the game ended.))


Assassin Cultists: Acquire missiles from inquisitors.
Cultists: Arm thyselves!

[Evonix]

Good the inept worshipers of dead gods and a pineapple can hoist themselves on their own petards so the climatic battle between a puff of smoke, a bartender, a bug, some guy in a desert, a rock, a small mammal and a fish can commence.

(Also can you announce when the game will begin?)

[Aslandus]

Good the inept worshipers of dead gods and a pineapple can hoist themselves on their own petards so the climatic battle between a puff of smoke, a bartender, a bug, some guy in a desert, a rock, a small mammal and a fish can commence.

(Also can you announce when the game will begin?)

When it does, I will, but there's this turn then one more before this game is completely over.

Cultists: Preserve Mad Matron's body.

[3] They manage to embalm the... sort of recognizable remains of the Mad Matron before the rotting really sets in. It's not permanent, but it'll keep for a bit longer. (MM body embalmed)

Paul: Party time!
[3] It's an alright party, but nobody comes but his own cultists and L. chosen (small party is had).
P. Cultists: attend party
[3] They hang around, but it's not as much fun without all the other guests they invited. All of them are too busy messing around with the remains of their dead gods to have a party.

They gut themselves on the knives and forget which side of the gun the bullet comes out of. Maybe we should leave weapon handling to the professionals... well, the slightly more experienced, at least (-30 cultists).

((No regrets.))
This may be it. I might have lost, because these stupid, good for nothing humans keep on disappointing me, even in death.
35 guys: Take the weapons, and assassinate Carl's wizards like real men! find a good, discreet base.
Everybody: Go into hiding. Take everything we have, and erase our existence from the minds of the mortals..

[6] They manage to find a base, but an argument breaks out and several end up dead (-20 cultists) ((Why do you keep trying to take weapons away from your armed cultists, do you think they're going to rise against you or something?))
The rest: [2] What is this hiding you speak of? Does it have to do with parties? Oh darn, already missed it, oh well.

((Oops, thought the game ended.))


Assassin Cultists: Acquire missiles from inquisitors.
Cultists: Arm thyselves!

[2] Where did those inquisitors go again? Dammit, we lost them! Oh well, they could only have stolen one missile with the eight of them anyway.
[4] They find weaponry to prepare for the coming end times. (150 cultists armed)

Inquisitors: What was that? A bunch of ravers stealing weapons? Dammit, weren't we done with this? Fire the missiles, we'll finish this.
[6] The one of the missiles goes off in the inquisitor's base and blows up the inquisitors, but they managed to get the rest to fire perfectly. On the bright side, you technically got the missiles. (missiles used, -16 inquisitors, -100 cultists).

Quarter of the Cultists: Keep up the Reputation Boosting Internet Propaganda Campaign, If another Cult/Inquisitors attack The Warehouse, Change The Focus of the Propaganda Campaign towards Lowering their Reputation and making the Public Hate the Attackers.
Quarter of the Cultists: Recruit more Cultists.
Quarter of the Cultists: Acquire Weaponry and equip The Guard Cultists, If all of The Guard Cultists are equipped, Recruit more Cultists with the Recruiting Group.
Quarter of the Cultists: Stand Guard at the Warehouse and if at all possible, Do so using weapons and train during their free time.

4 quarters, 4 actions, each gets 49-50 cultists
[6] They go on such an internet rampage that they lose all credibility and are seen as a group of trolls out to mess with everyone (credibility ruined).
[1] Oh no, it's more of those jocks, why does this world have so many of them? (+30 inquisitors)
[5] They get the finest weaponry they can find, including guns, explosives, and armored vehicles. Don't ask where they got that stuff. Also, what guards? Nobody's on guard yet (+50 heavily armed cultists)
[4] They stand guard over the base. No time for training, there's guarding to do (50 cultists guarding)

[Ardent Debater]

EDIT: Ignore this.

[Adragis]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Name: The Smiling One. Also known as The Peaceful One. Also known as Joyful. Also known as Rosabel.
Abilities: Aura of Peace - The Smiling One exudes a feeling of wellbeing and happiness, causing people in the near vicinity of her physical form or people she designates on a whim to feel happy and carefree.
Give Life - The Peaceful One emits a constant positive energy when in physical form which imbues nearby plants and animals with life. Dying plants become strong and new, and the sick are healed. This is completely passive and uncontrolled: everything is healed, even if it's trying to kill her.
Healing Blood - The Peaceful One does not, of course, really have blood in the conventional sense. However, she sometimes causes a metallic, golden liquid to manifest itself which can cure all conventional and most unconventional ills. When applied to a dead body, it raises it from the dead. Her physical body's veins are filled with it, hence the name 'blood'.
Innocence - The Smiling One can influence people without needing to resort to insidious whispers in the mind, as she displays almost sickening amounts of innocence, purity, hope, happiness, etc. It's hard for normal, non-crazed people to hate her.
Appearance: The Smiling One's appearance in the physical world is usually consistent: Always female, always young-looking, and always the bearer of a pair of terrible wounds reminiscent of a Glasgow smile. Her form in her home plane is also that of a young-looking human female, although lacking the injuries. Homeworld: The Smiling One exists in an infinite, lush paradisical garden in one of the alternate planes of reality. Seeing this frail, dying world saddened her, and she resolves to enable it to exist in peaceful, carefree eternity, with no more senseless loss of life.
Stats:
Presence: 2
Mindlock: 0
Power: 1
Physique: 0
Appeal: 2

[Aslandus]

An aura ability with no presence? Are you sure? It won't do much without that...

End of Epilogue 2.
score:
Nightmare(DEAD) - 50 armed cultists, 8 assassin cultists, flooded cave base with flame thrower defenses, secured Orb of Stalwart 1 (underwater), has plushies, glorious presence, has been summoned,  plushies distributed, plushie market flooded, plushie warehouse literally flooded
Carl Yelvin(SUPER DEAD) - 98 cultists, 50 heavily armed cultists, 50 cultists guarding, 5 unconscious chosen, dragon blood, access to Orb of Stalwart 3, access to orb of Stalwart 4, access to orb of stalwart 5, summoned, 8 steel golems, abandoned warehouse base, 30 inquisitors
Plauge Doctor(SQUASHED INTO A FINE JELLY... ALSO DEAD) - 25 armed cultists, inquisitors can treat plague victims, access to Orb of Stalwart 2, has dragon blood, Jeff (DEAD), has been summoned, remains sealed away, inquisitors active, 150 civilians dead of disease, least hated by Lucifer, friends with Giant Paul, 100 Jeff's cultists, hated by humanity
Mad matron(DEAD) - 50 cultists (guarding the remains), 5 cultists, access to Orb of Stalwart 2, has dragon blood, has been summoned, body embalmed, loved by humans, Giant Paul, 40 armed Paul's cultists, 50 Paul's cultists, has found Nightmare's base, Lucifer w/ Shadowbane and angelic armor (DEAD), 5 Lucifer's chosen (Joined Paul)
Other: existence of horrors poorly revealed (in spite of the inquisitors' efforts and CY's reckless exposing of his summoned beasts)

[wipeout1024]

Continue to preserve Mad Matron's body.

[Adragis]

Whoops, edited. Forgot that stat existed

[Sl4cker]

This is it. I have realized that the world is too strong for a full on attack, and my cult has suffered greatly for it. I will poison the world slowly, surely. One person at a time.

Everybody: Go into hiding, amass a great number of people decades from now and THEN you can poison the world. I'm throwing my hopes into the future here, and I don't have much hope.

[Evonix]

ignore this

[carp]

I am an idioto and this is totally something I evonix wrote

(don't worry he's my brother I can literally walk over and hug him)