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[Mathel]

Granted. They were banned for only 5 minutes anyway. And I still do not know who they are.

I wish to learn who the grisha5 cultists are.

[Derpy Dev]

Granted. After learning the knowledge of their cult, you are instantly driven mad for seeing things mortals weren't supposed to see.
But seriously here's a link

I wish for a bed the size of the Statue of Liberty.

[Ultimuh]

Granted. It is however not for you to sleep in.

I wish for a toilet bowl large enough to flush down the entire solar system.

[Dunamisdeos]

Granted! The Solar System has been shrunk down to the size of a pea. You may now flush the solar system.

I wish for a carrot.

[Glass]

Granted. You can find it in your left eye.

I wish for an incorruptible wish.

[Lenglon]

Granted, but it's to not wish at all. (and has happened many times in this thread so I'm not going to do it myself)

I wish for the ability to literally surf the internet.

[Glass]

Congratulations, wish granted! The internet has flooded into the ocean, and is no longer accessible from your computer. Most of the world is displeased with you for making this happen.

I wish that Enemy Post would make a sequel to Minimalism and Milk.

[MoonyTheHuman]

Granted, it adds a new thing called 'random unpredictable deaths' as a feature.

I wish for the internet to be spambot free

[CABL]

Granted, there's no spambots or adware in the Internet, but now each web-site contains some sort of ransomware/malware.

I wish that grisha5 never happened in every timeline possible.

[Mathel]

I thought we already established that everyone worships grisha5, whether they do so knowingly or not?

((Sorry, there was no quote button there))

Granted. Everybody in every timeline is deleted.

I wish for christianity and islam to be deleted, effective today 12:00 GMT.
Only the religions, not the people.

[CABL]

Granted. Christianity and Islam merge together (don't ask how), and a new religion is created. It's called Christislam, and it combines the worst traits of both religions in one, causing the very first global Crujad. Crujad is successful, and now the world emerges into The Age of Ignorance.

I wish for a docile pet cazador.

((Christianity and Islam don't exist anymore, so I guess merging counts as a deletion.))

[Mathel]

Granted, the Cazodor is overprotective of you and poisons everyone around you to death.

I wish that people would not fight over abstract things.

((Merging in this case does fuifill and corrupt the wish in my opinion, CrocAndBearLover.))

[Ultimuh]

Granted. They fight over physical and material things now. Wait.. Haven't they always done that?

I wish for.. I dunno.. A football?

[Khan Boyzitbig]

Granted, your feet are now balls.

I wish for summer to go away early.

[CABL]

Granted, but now each summer only last a month, which means each winter has the length of five months. Oh, and every winter is now super cold (from -45 to -80 Celsius) in every region, except Central Sahara.

I wish to know what's the meaning of life.

Important Note: And no, saying "forty-two" is not acceptable.