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[Eric Blank]

Granted. You are composed of molecules that function on the molecular scale and thus continue to live.

I wish to get rid of undesirable people.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. You commit suicide.

I wish Kevak had a new supercomputer that was in every way friendly to mankind and their possessions.

[~Neri]

Granted, the computer is not above playing perverse jokes though, and occasionally sends you long tubular objects through the mail.

I wish for a gun that shoots rainbows and butterflies and is in no way harmful to anything.

[Hubris Incalculable]

granted, your bullets fly through the butterflies and the rainbows without harming them. It's not like you can actually harm a rainbow anyway, seeing as they are optical illusions.

I wish I had more time to hang out with my girl.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. However, her schedule becomes increasingly busy and you end up being only able to see her about once a week.

I wish for the CIA to be renamed to the HAHAHTROLOLOLTERRORISTSHAH

[Hubris Incalculable]

Granted. However, her schedule becomes increasingly busy and you end up being only able to see her about once a week.

((That's exactly why I want more time to hang out.))

[TD1]

Granted. However, her schedule becomes increasingly busy and you end up being only able to see her about once a week.

I wish for the CIA to be renamed to the HAHAHTROLOLOLTERRORISTSHAH

Granted. The terrorists are offended. Legal action is pursued, and a fine issued. You hurt their feelings, and must feel the full force of the law.

I wish for Carrot Soup

[Eric Blank]

Granted. You get mushy orange stuff.

I wish for more chicken burritos

[WillowLuman]

Granted, they contain steamed chicken bones.

I wish for better hot wings.

[Roc CURIOUSBEAST_EATER]

Granted,
They are too hot for you.

I wish for some forum njana's

[hops]

Granted. Bay12 is bought by the New Jersey Association of Nurse Anesthetists and is used as their forum. All discussions about forum games and Dwarf Fortress cease.

I wish for burrito bisons.

[JackOSpades]

 Granted you get burritos made with 100% bison meat, enjoy.

I wish for a larger selection of domesticated meat animals.

[Roc CURIOUSBEAST_EATER]

Granted,
PETA sues you and win's the lawsuit.

I wish for people to buy more of me.

[~Neri]

Granted, you are now someone's pet.

I wish for a bucket.

[jaxy15]

Granted. It has a really big hole in the bottom.

I wish more people would understand the difference between sentience and sapience.