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[Eric Blank]

Granted. They ruin the experience with terrible fan fiction.

I wish to be able to force anyone to uphold any promise they may make.

[Lyeos]

Granted, nobody ever makes a promise with you because you hold those who promise you things at gunpoint.

I wish certain people would stop lying to me.

[Scotsmen]

Granted. They instead tell you the truth, being that they think you a horrible bastard who should go crawl in a hole and die. You then do so.

I wish someone would write a detailed death for me, involving !!SPACE!!.

[Shoruke]

Granted. Chell opens a portal under you, and one on the moon, and then closes the moon side. You are catapulted into airless space, and your sense of time warps as the low gravity causes you to fall back to Luna's bleak surface too slowly for you as you struggle to keep your breath. The cold airlessness bites at you, and as your panic increases, your vision fades as asphyxiation claims you.

I wish for my work shift to end early so I can go home and nap...

[~Neri]

Granted, nobody ever makes a promise with you because you hold those who promise you things at gunpoint.

I wish certain people would stop lying to me.

((If you are talking about the combat system, that'll be up soon, someone started messaging me about a problem, I dealt with it though.))

[Lyeos]

Granted, nobody ever makes a promise with you because you hold those who promise you things at gunpoint.

I wish certain people would stop lying to me.

((If you are talking about the combat system, that'll be up soon, someone started messaging me about a problem, I dealt with it though.))

((I was talking about my girlfriend and her obsession with a stupid game. Keeps promising to spend time with me but just ends up playing it instead. Very frustrating. Very stubborn.))

Granted, but once they learn you've been goofing off on the Bay12 Forums, they fire you.

I wish for fewer misunderstandings.

[blazing glory]

Granted, nobody ever makes a promise with you because you hold those who promise you things at gunpoint.

I wish certain people would stop lying to me.

((If you are talking about the combat system, that'll be up soon, someone started messaging me about a problem, I dealt with it though.))

((Speaking of that I don't want to sound whiny but will you update today?))

Granted,everyone now understands everything,nobody likes anyone else any more.

I wish to know exactly when Kevak will update.

[Lyeos]

Granted! You know he'll update when he's finished making the system for Prophet's game! Unfortunately, he gets pneumonia and doesn't complete it for a long time, enraging both players in his games and those waiting for him to finish!

I wish I could force people to think about things from my perspective.

[Arcvasti]

Granted. Everyone is you. The problem is, you are actually kind of annoying when everyone is you. Civil war ensues.

I wish for ice cubes.

[nomoetoe]

Granted, there up you bum.

I wish for FEH!

[Lyeos]

Granted, you gain a fatal exit hole in your head. A better term would be exit wound. You're dead now.

I wish Kevak was a happy snowflake.

[Prophet]

Granted. He lands right on your eye causing you stingy pain!

I wish that Kev-senpai was dictator of the world.

[Lyeos]

Granted. He lands right on your eye causing you stingy pain!

((... In what world does a snowflake to the eye cause stinging pain?))
Granted, he's the dictator of the world of Trapisti. Mind you, this is post-eradication Trapisti, so all of your cult members are dead.

I wish things like that wish didn't happen.

[Scotsmen]

Granted. Instead, things like my wish happen:

I wish the world to be under my rule, so I could treat it like my Dwarf Fortress.

[Prophet]

((Have you had a snowflake land on your eye?))
Granted. The world of blank is under your rule have fun.

I wish for more Kevak wishes.