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[Imperial Guardsman]

Granted, you find it and its broken.
I wish for a million dollars.

[nomoetoe]

Granted, there outside...in the thunderstorm.

I wish for a FABULOUS rain full of rainbow colored water.

[Imperial Guardsman]

Granted, enjoy the drought that comes after.

I wish for new episodes of Madoka.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. You get another psychotic episode where you see mad okra trying to kill and eat you. You then wake up and realize that it is actually happening.

I wish for that to happen to IG. Because I'm so cruel.

[Lyeos]

Granted, turns out he has Ante-Ante from a certain forum game and ends up killing not only the okra but you as well!

I wish I had Ante-Ante from that forum game while it still has the bullet inside of it.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. You accidentally shoot yourself in the foot.

I wish that Lyeos won't be upset with me ending Land of the Dead.

[Lyeos]

Granted, he isn't, but he demands that "Because ponies!" be put somewhere in your new RtD.

I wish I could remember the name of that band who I listened to once that was surprisingly good for a death metal band.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. You then remember that they aren't.

I wish I didn't have to put "BECAUSE PONIES" in my RtD.

[Imperial Guardsman]

Granted, you now have to put "BECAUSE FURRIES"

I wish for a gaming PC.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. You get a Player Character who likes gaming.

I wish I had a personal computer dedicated to gaming.

[Lyeos]

Granted, your computer spends all of its time playing games instead of doing what you want it to.

I wish I could force them to play death metal at my graduation!

[Trapezohedron]

Granted. Your local religious organization barges in, cancels the graduation, evaluates your history and prevents you from graduating from that particular school forever.

Relieve me from my lethargy.

[Hubris Incalculable]

Granted. What a nice Commodore 64 you have there! And such an extensive game collection, too! Boulderdash, Colossal Cave Adventure, Rogue, Chip's Challenge... Ooo! Even Maniac Mansion!

I wish I had a Commodore as nice as Worldmaster's.

What a waste of a corruption.

Granted. Due to other circumstances, however, (your homework, young man!) they don't let you graduate.


NOT AGAIN!

Granted. You are no longer lethargic. You are dead.

I wish I was faster at posting corruptions.

[Worldmaster27]

You are no longer lethargic, as you are being chased by hungry wolves.
Granted. You are so fast you ninja everyone, and keep double posting.

I wish the first update of tBftP wasn't taking so long to write.

[Lyeos]

Granted. Due to other circumstances, however, (your homework, young man!) they don't let you graduate.

((Actually, this is probably true. I'm most likely not gonna graduate.))

Granted, it takes exactly one second shorter than it's going to take now.

I wish I had warm, fluffy socks.