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[WillowLuman]

Granted. You are expelled.

I wish to know the name of the most awesome villain song out there.

[HissinhWalnuts]

You know it but its in eldritch tones that make you go insane.

I WISH I HAD MY ENCHILADA!

[Remuthra]

Your enchilada is so delicious, the universe simply cannot acknowledge its existence. The enchilada tears a hole through the fabric of spacetime and you fall into the void.

I wish I could start up my rampage of the lower forums again.

[WillowLuman]

Granted, but it's so destructive to other threads that you get banned.

I wish to get my work done.

[wer6]

Granted, however your work is not to get my work done.

Wish HugoLuman whould do his work and not my work

[Ultimuh]

Granted, his own work consists of stalking, mainly you.
Sending creepy letters to you, watching you sleep.


I wish somone sent HugoLuman a restraining order.

[WillowLuman]

Granted but he ignores it.

I wish my wristwatch would keep time more accurately

[LeoLeonardoIII]

Granted, it now absorbs time. The universe stops functioning, suspended in a perpetual state of you looking at your watch quizzically.

I wish it were easier to run a PbP forum game of D&D.

[RangerCado]

Granted, time zones no longer exist! ...but then again, nothing seems to exist now, oh well!

I wish my characters weren't shipped so much.

[Empiricist]

Granted. They now experience traumatic events instead of shipping.
I wish that Bay12 stopped having gateway errors.

[Gentlefish]

Granted. You get the first-ever 404 error.

I wish I could do related rates well.

[misko27]

Granted. To make room for that we removed the part of your brain responsible for moving your fingers.


I wish the spambots would go away.

[HissinhWalnuts]

Granted they go away, but a bunch of COD kids start raging about this being a copy of Minecraft.

I.WISH.I.HAD.MY.ENCHILADA!

[Erils]

I.WISH.I.HAD.MY.ENCHILADA!

Granted, but it's made of highly irradiated uranium-238.

I wish that I knew a better response to the previous question.

[WillowLuman]

Granted. It involves spider pancakes.

I wish to rescue my Kerbals who are stranded in Space.