Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[RAM]

You gain a practical demonstration of abandoning past regrets in favour of current regrets. Most of your current regrets involve obeying gravity and being positioned approximately 200 metres above a very large, very uncomfortable-looking concrete sculpture with no means of support and no aerodynamic purchase...

I wish for the cake and spoon from such memes as "the cake is a lie" and "there is no spoon"...

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Granted. The Matrix becomes reality. You are in the interrogation room. There is a perfect cake in front of you with a perfect spoon inserted into it. You know what you've just done, but try as you might you can't wish away the cake in your mouth nor the spoon in your hand.

I wish the earth (perpetually) spun at a rate where one full rotation (of the earth) is completed in a time span equivalent to 28 hours.

[pisskop]

Granted, the Earth suddenly slows down and some scientist dumbass who saw a movie thinks its a good idea to detonate a nuke in the Earth's core.

I wish I had remembered my charger today.  No laptop

[RAM]

Normally the spontaneous generation of your own personal two-metre tall warhorse in heavy armour would be a cause for celebration. Unfortunately, it appeared on top of your pal...

I wish to go back in time to stop the leader of the human resistance from being born.

[timferius]

Normally the spontaneous generation of your own personal two-metre tall warhorse in heavy armour would be a cause for celebration. Unfortunately, it appeared on top of your pal...

I wish to go back in time to stop the leader of the human resistance from being born.

Granted, however you overshoot and have to wait until he's born... Except you over shoot so far that the earth is still in a molten state, your only weakness.

I wish for horse armour.

[adasdad]

You are wearing armor made of horse meat.

I wish that season 4 of mlp will be very entertaining and of high quality.

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Granted, but it's now live-action and only produced in Russian.

I wish I had the ability to control all weather.

[Remuthra]

Granted. You can now control all weathering. Have fun contolling the rate at which rock breaks into pieces!

I wish I was playing Dwarf Fortress.

[Komra]

Granted. You fail to lose, having no fun in the endless process.

I wish to have no further need for or compulsion to sleep.

[pisskop]

Granted.  The human Your lifespan is shortened by 1/3.

I wish I had my license back already.

[Remuthra]

You have your chiropractor's license back already.

I wish in an alternate dimension for an infinite series of squirrels to be murdered by another infinite series of squirrels.

[RAM]

I am claiming to have granted that wish, but, realistically, I am probably lying...

I wish that the spare parts fairy would travel the night replacing all the missing organs.

[Remuthra]

Granted. The Spare Parts Fairy travels the night, replacing everyone's missing organs with Pringles cans full of Cheetos.

I wish I was on fire.

[Zephyr]

Granted. you are now standing on a smouldering pit of charcoals. the experience is quite unpleasant but the only thing that really gets burned are your legs. perhaps next time you should be on grass or dirt.

I wish I was eternally 23.

[Gamerboy4life]

Granted. you are now standing on a smouldering pit of charcoals. the experience is quite unpleasant but the only thing that really gets burned are your legs. perhaps next time you should be on grass or dirt.

I wish I was eternally 23.

Granted, you now get to watch your friends and family die around you as you spend eternity trying to get laid, but ultimately failing.

I wish I was invincible.