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[xdarkcodex]

Granted, They hook it up to an amp instead which is even louder.

I wish I had a job were I get paid to do nothing.

[Devling]

Too bad you die from not being able to process air!

Iw Sish Fol rove.

[kaijyuu]

You wish for rove, but get love instead.



I wish for the reader of this post to get perpetual happiness.

[Argonnek]

Granted, but having no ability to feel anything else, they are put into an insane asylum.

I wish I was incapable of procrastination.

[mainiac]

Granted, They hook it up to an amp instead which is even louder.

Dear god it actually happened.

I wish I was incapable of procrastination.

You die of exhaustion.

I wish the world were moved slightly closer to a weak Pareto optimum.

[agertor]

Granted Stalin revives as a zombie, takes over the world, calls it communism, it is actually socialism. Then everyone is treated equally to death, despair and fear. Economy no longer matters!

I wish communism actually happened, because it never has.

[zomara0292]

Granted Stalin revives as a zombie, takes over the world, calls it communism, it is actually socialism. Then everyone is treated equally to death, despair and fear. Economy no longer matters!

I wish communism actually happened, because it never has.

It does, but most people confuse it with anarchy.

I wish I wished upon a star. 

[MikaTheCrazy]

Granted, you instantly burn away.

I wish for a pet frog. The exploding variety.

[Guardian G.I.]

Oh, the potential for tragic accidents is unlimited.

I wish PayPal would actually work in Belarus/Ukraine/Russia/other post-Soviet countries just like in the rest of the world. Right now they love to terminate accounts from post-Soviet states without any warning or explanation, which renders the international credit card (which is tied to the account) useless. International credit cards aren't cheap.

[Devling]

(my last three wishes have turned out just the way I wanted them, wtf guys?)

The unfornate trade off is the rest of the world moves on to, USA PAL, which denies membership to any former enemy's of the united states or its allies.

I wish my wish would wish for fish wishes.

[agertor]

Granted, but you do not speak fish and can not be granted those wishes

I wish I could stop being sore right now

[Scelly9]

Granted, you are no longer sore. Instead you are in stabbing pain.

I wish my wish would be granted or not.

[Spinal_Taper]

Your wish is granted. Unfortunately, the wish fairy can't decide which of the variables to grant and decides to transform you into an ape. I wish I had all the abilities of Dr. Manhattan.

[Playergamer]

Granted.However,i do not know who Doctor Manhattan is,and thus,you are given the powers of a Normal doctor named Manhattan. Oh look,he was seriously over-worked! 

I wish Devling spoke fish. I want someone to preach about the space butterfly and time fish to!

[Skyrunner]

Devling does, but is promptly baked into the following cake, being mistaken for fish-shaped things.

One 18.25 ounce package chocolate cake mix, one can prepared coconut pecan frosting, 3/4 cup vegetable oil, four large eggs, one cup semi-sweet chocolate chips, 3/4 cup butter or margarine, 1 and 2/3 cups granulated sugar, two cups all purpose flour.
Don't forget garnishes such as: fish-shaped crackers, fish-shaped candies, fish-shaped solid waste, fish-shaped dirt, fish-shaped ethyl benzene, pull-and-peel licorice, fish-shaped volatile organic compounds and sediment shaped sediment, candy coated peanut butter pieces shaped like fish, one cup lemon juice, alpha resins, unsaturated polyester resin, fiberglass surface resins, and volatile malted milk impoundments, nine large egg yolks, twelve medium geosynthetic membranes, one cup granulated sugar, an entry called 'How to Kill Someone with Your Bare Hands', two cups rhubarb sliced, 2/3 cup granulated rhubarb, one tablespoon all-purpose rhubarb, one teaspoon grated orange rhubarb, three tablespoons rhubarb on fire, one large rhubarb, one cross borehole electro-magnetic imaging rhubarb, two tablespoons rhubarb juice, adjustable aluminum head positioner, slaughter electric needle injector, cordless electric needle injector, injector needle driver, injector needle gun, cranial caps. And it contains proven preservatives, deep penetration agents, and gas and odor control chemicals that will deodorize and preserve putrid tissue.

I want that cake.