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[Kestrel_6]

granted. Its sterility drives you insane. How could DIRT be sterile?

i wish for a M6D Magnum (Halo Reach's Pistol)

[Trapezohedron]

Granted. It is made out of plastic, made in china, and there's no ammo in it, and for it.

It's basically a shoddy piece of chinese imitation crud.

I wish for a glass of cocaineke

[terkiey]

Granted, Your glass is not open at the top.

I wish that coca-cola wasn't so fucking delicious like minotaurs.

[zomara0292]

Granted. They really stop putting coke in their product.
I wish mental illnesses were drastically simpler to cope with.

[IamanElfCollaborator]

Granted. They now toss mentally sick people into magma, like the dwarves. Nice going DF, you have corrupted my mind!

I wish I had no stuffed toys in my house.

[Valid_Dark]

granted, but along with the stuffed toys, all of the other toys also disappeared, (including video games)

I wish I wish I was a Fish.

[Knick]

Granted.  You flop on the ground, suffocating.  Too bad you did not wish for a fish bowl.

I wish winter was over.

[zomara0292]

Granted, Winter is gone and summer is here. Along with it, it brings the hottest days of the year. Rivers dry, and greenery bakes. Not a drop of water is left on the earth to take. Round about, far and near. You search and search to avoid death, your new fear.

I wish to clean this danm sticky keyboard.

[terkiey]

Granted, you clean the keyboard of keys.

I wish my KEES where circus dwelling faggots.

[rarborman]

Granted your knees are now circus dwelling fagots.

I wish this forum was more like it was 6 years ago.

[terkiey]

Granted, but a paradox 'happens' and everyone dies. The end.

I wish that I had that wish I wish

[Phantom of The Library]

Granted your wish is that you are a space worm, being a space worm is an incredibly dull experience, nothing to do but eat hydrogen.  Until one day this ship lands inside of your stomach, you try to eat it but it escapes.  The moment it flies out of sight a blue police box appears followed by a trail of oddly shaped machines chanting "Eliminate" over and over again.  They fail to eliminate you and you are left there crippled for thousands of years until a man in Russian clothing takes your brain and preserves it then dropping it off in the dimension of pain while you are still self aware.

I wish I didn't have to sleep.

[IamanElfCollaborator]

Granted. However, over the years of your non-sleeping, your memories and reality become mixed, as your mind overloads from the lack of rest. You slowly begin to see figures from your past, and see places as they were 4 or 5 years ago. You eventually become a drunk to escape it, but not even that stops it.

One day, you pick up a revolver. You try to shoot yourself. It wasn't loaded. You go berserk and kill 10 people, and then you are locked up in an asylum, there to live out your days.

I wish I had fool's gold.

[Flying Dice]

Granted. A fool kills you for it.



I wish I could be stuck in a Groundhog Day timeloop.

[Skyrunner]

Granted. You stay there forever and ever, your memory being reset every time you hit Groundhog's Day, until the end of time.

I wish I was allowed to use Maptools more than once a week.