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[ggamer]

granted, but suddenly everyone speaks one language, and your skill is not needed.

I wish twilight never existed.

[Vorthon]

Granted, but since it never existed, you can't wish it never existed, therefore you can wish it never existed, ad infinitum... Way to go, you just broke the universe.

I wish I was a human/mountain lion hybrid. (Don't judge me!)

[rarborman]

Granted but poachers deside they like your pelt and have you turned into a very nice black market fur coat.

I wish for a scarily accurate cat action figure.

[Hubris Incalculable]

Granted! The scarily accurate cat figure is, in fact, alive! It claws your face for 3 hp! (97 hp left)

I wish rap didn't exist, and that rock was still the most popular form of music.

[LordMelvin]

Granted. Thanks for taking one for the team with the whole "cursed-with-deafness" corrolary. Everyone else totally enjoys the return of sanity and good taste.

I wish ATI made a better Linux driver.

[Rose]

Granted, They make proper drivers for linux because linux is now owned by a multinational corporation, and you need to sign over your soul to The Man to run it.

I wish I didn't have to work so much.

[Jiharo]

Granted. You die from exhaustion.

I wish I could sleep no more then three hours per day without harm to health.

[Rose]

granded, sleeping more than three hours a day harms your health greatly.

too bad you still sleep the same amount.

I wish I didn't have to work late.

[dwarfguy2]

Granted, you don't have to work late... BECAUSE YOUR BOSS IS GOD AND HAS ETERNALLY TRAPPED YOU IN A REALM THAT IS ALWAYS DAWN!

I wish dhkbjfhrs;yigrlghdujrrbkrhlkrhz.

[vadia]

Granted, you don't have to work late... BECAUSE YOUR BOSS IS GOD AND HAS ETERNALLY TRAPPED YOU IN A REALM THAT IS ALWAYS DAWN!

I wish dhkbjfhrs;yigrlghdujrrbkrhlkrhz.

Yup you no longer know how to type or read, but you don't know that.  You'll keep typing gibberish and wondering why your accounts keep getting lost and your friends hate you, until you crash into a car because you didn't know that it was a "one way street"

I wish the next poster a good new year (but the Jewish new year not Christian one hahahaha!)

[lordnincompoop]

Thank you. I am now Jewish.

I wish for some codemonkeys to do all this programming for me.

[AntiAntiMatter]

Granted. They finish early and make a virus that blows up your computer.


I wish that Twilight portrayed vampires correctly and wasn't a sappy romance.

[vadia]

vampires don't exist so meyers writes a blank book and the movie is a blank wall and every girl goes gaga over the main character anyway.  The human race dies out.

I wish I wren't so @$^&$%@!!@ tired.

[Hubris Incalculable]

I wish I wren't so @$^&$%@!!@ tired.

Granted. a wren comes and pecks on your skull 'till you wake up properly.

i wish for snow!!! we ain't had any 'round here in a while.

[ggamer]

granted, but it gets so snowy you have a sudden case of frostbite.

I wish, I wish, I was a fish.