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[AntiAntiMatter]

@Scood:Granted. Due to a forum glitch, it spams your new replies list anyway.

I wish that my new replies list was not spammed by topics like this.

[Darvi]

Granted. Your email-inbox gets flooded with unblockable spammail instead.

I wish for this thread to be stickied.

[Ultimuh]

Granted, it's stickied to your forehead.

I wish I could win the lottery once in a while.

[Darvi]

Granted. It's that lottery from that infamous short story of the same name.

I wish for more Orangina, I've just emptied my last bottle.

[AntiAntiMatter]

Granted. It is of the new, arsenic flavor.

I wish that I had 1 billion US dollars and that nothing bad at all happened because of it.

[Darvi]

Yummy.

Granted. You spend it all for welfare.

I wish for real life god mode. (not like half life's buddha mode, though)

[lordnincompoop]

Granted. You are unable to die, and must live to see the death of everyone you know, and burn forever on the sun-scorched lands of the Earth during Sun's red giant phase, and shiver on it for ever after until the heat-death of the universe.

I wish I had a Death Note.

[Peewee]

Granted. Death just handed you a note with your name on it.

I wish for a gimp suit.

[lordnincompoop]

Granted. It is delivered by a team of dominatrices, who whip you to death while suffocating you gently.

I wish for Death's note to go away. I don't like him; he's too shy.

[Taricus]

Granted. He takes you away as well.

I wish I was a benevolent dictator.

[AntiAntiMatter]

Granted. You are overthrown and replaced by a malevolent dictator.

I wish that I knew the truth about everything, and could handle it.

[lordnincompoop]

Granted. You quickly grow bored with the world, and shoot yourself.

I wish Death would stop taking me away to these shady nightclubs.

[AntiAntiMatter]

Granted. He takes you to hell instead.

I wish that I ruled the world.

[lordnincompoop]

Granted. You ruled the world, a long time ago. Everyone hates you for it.

I wish hell would freeze over.

[Taricus]

Granted. Death send you the Aircon bill.

I wish I had a flamethrower.