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[Comrade_Fregge]

Granted, peas in the size of the earth start falling from the sky, killing everyone.

I wish someone else could wish for me.

[Taco Dan]

Someone else wishes for you, teleporting you to them halfway across the globe stranded on an island with a crazy hermit. The hermit has run out of food and eats you in order to survive.


I wish I could get get school over with dammit.

[Repulsion]

Someone else gets school over with for you... by nuking it with you inside!

I wish that my sanity won't be wrecked by Amnesia: The Dark Descent anymore....

[Taco Dan]

OK. Instead it wrecks your body. You are now a cripple because a video game beat you up.


I wish Jumbo pelican hamster melon.

[lemon10]

Errr... granted, you become a jumbo pelican hamster melon because of your vaugness.

I wish I was the head of the secret conspiracy organization ruling the world.

[vadia]

You are the head of the meta bearacracy organization.  They have medicines to keep you up 24 hours a day so that you can keep up with the hordes of paperwork.

I wish I had a fish wish dish (ala Seuss)

[lordnincompoop]

Granted. Shortly thereafter, a Bill kills you in the hills to get a thrill and use you with his grill. He mills you over in Brazil to get some nice swill for his shrill friend Melville who drills up a nice still with his great skill to make some more swills with kills.

I wish I had several more hard drives.

[Vorthon]

Granted, but they're broken.

I wish I could explode at will without hurting or killing myself.

[AntiAntiMatter]

Granted. The explosions are massive and you wipe out the surrounding 500 miles testing it.


I wish I had a non-broken copy of Morrowind GOTY Edition.

[lordnincompoop]

Granted. It is delivered inside a rotting human carcass.

I wish the polarities of protons and electrons were switched, causing electrons to have a positive charge and protons negative charges.

[Urist McOverlord]

Granted. Unfortunately, the charges of the antiparticles are not changed. Now matter repels antimatter powerfully enough that antimatter power is forever blocked off to us. When humanity turns the earth into a rotting husk, there are no antimatter vehicles to permit handy interstellar travel, and humanity dies off with the planet.

I wish that I had never been linked to tvtropes.

[GrueSlayer]

Wish Granted. The internet was never invented.

I wish that real life physics emulates dwarven physics.

[Urist McOverlord]

Granted. Unfortunately, dwarf fortress players recognise this.

Magma. Everywhere.

I wish for Magma. Everywhere.

[Comrade_Fregge]

Granted, have fun with your Everywhere and Magma.

I wish I could live in my favorite DF world.

[Vorthon]

Granted. You live there for a couple months, then you die because a kobold gets lucky and one-shots you with a sock.

I wish I was a true immortal (Indestructable, eternal youth, no need for sleep, food, water, etc.).