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[Tradanbattlan]

Granted. You get a micro-sized flamethrower that is being used to cause you discomfort. You have a permit for it, but you lost it. It has enough fuel just to torch your foot.

I wish Batman wasn't so terrifying.
Alternatively, I wish he wouldn't appear behind me and rub my shoulders.

[Hungry]

Granted granted but the entire justice league mistakes you for a mind controlling villian and destroy you utterly.

I wish for a moat, to keep my sl....workers from leaving.

[Cheddarius]

Granted. All your sl....workers go melancholy and jump.

I wish I could do more work in less time.

[Creaca]

Granted. You are locked in a room with nothing but supplies directly related to your work, the next months workload, and located on the wall is a timer counting down from 24 hours. If you fail to complete this larger workload in less time, you'll keep reappearing in the room with the timer reset to 24 hours, and all previous work abolished until completed.

I wish I had an organ of some type, maybe even a pair of them, that could draw in air from around me, process out oxygen, put that into my blood for my cells, then force out byproduct gasses.

[Hungry]

Granted your lungs are replaced with bagpipes that function as lungs but makes bad music when you breath.

I wish for bad spelling.

[Tradanbattlan]

Granted. The spelling bee participants go rogue and kill everyone.

I wish that wasn't me in this situation

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

He is so scary that he saps his own color.

[Cheddarius]

Granted. You are teleported to a different situation.
With a thousand Pikachus.
They never sleep.
They never eat.

eye wis 4 Gud speling/gramer

[Phantom]

Granted, although you only think it's good. Damn I can't understand.

I wish for 5000 pound sterling. The british money type.

[Cheddarius]

Granted. It is firmly lodged in your skull.

I wish I had a suit of modern body armor.

[Creaca]

Granted. Of course, it isn't in your size, and it's colored in plaid.


I wish my pair of bagpipe lungs didn't sound so awful.

[Cheddarius]

Granted. You receive a pair of glorious bagpipe lungs. However, they're outside your body and degrade almost instantaneously.

I wish my projects would work out better.

[silhouette]

granted.
but just as your about to finish all your dwarves tantrum and destroy it all in a minute..

I wish for titans

[silhouette]

THIS POST WAS AN ACCIDENT

[xdarkcodex]

Granted
But they are brainless idiots and fell on you.

I wish everybody had a $1,000,000 AUD in 5c coins.

[kilakan]

everybody does have $1,000,000 AUD in 5c coins, and then the earth implodes from the extra weight.  Just like a fat kid with one too many cookies.....

I wish I had a cookie made from normal cookie ingredients.