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[Huesoo]

Granted

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-TH5ibABP4U&feature=related
If you have good taste

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Jy0YmvGc6o
If you have horrible taste

I wish I could have love with that backstreet guy.

[LeoLeonardoIII]

Granted, you love him dearly. It is the purest, most passionate love one being has ever had for another. Unfortunately he loves another! You die of a broken heart. A low quality band makes a song about it and several dozen morons on Youtube mumble the lyrics while drooling on their cheap guitars. Bigots fill the comment threads with poison. It makes everyone a little sadder.

I wish my girl would call! Date today!

[webadict]

Granted. You go out with your daughter.

I wish I didn't go there.

[Huesoo]

Granted you make a wish about him doing his dog.

I wish my dance moves werent so good.

[inteuniso]

Granted. They become great. You get into the finals of So You Think You Can Dance and are brutally murdered for your crazy skill.

[Huesoo]

Granted you get your rimjob from a hobbo but that hobbo has herpes!

I wish the ESO network on age of empires would work.

[webadict]

Granted, but they didn't have computers back then.

I wish you'd spell hobo right.

[Huesoo]

Granted you learns how to spell

I wish you knew that people from different places spell things different. (colour)

[Tradanbattlan]

Granted. He knows, but you don't.

I wish my computer could run Mass Effect on something else than the lowest settings, jesus christ

[LeoLeonardoIII]

Granted, a Wild Canadian Nerd overclocks your CPU and you can run Mass Effect one setting higher in each category. But several seconds later your computer blows up, your desk is in ruins, and there is a hole in your ceiling.

I wish I could go home and take naps already!

[Cheddarius]

A wild Canadian Nerd appears!

Granted. You go home and take a nap... and never wake up.
Man, that's sad, even for me.

I wish the government was better.

[LeoLeonardoIII]

Granted. They keep waking you up!

I wish I woke up at the end of your sad, sad granting above.

[dragnar]

Granted. A wild Canadian nerd hooks you up to a generator, throws a lever, and begins yelling "It's alive!". You are now a monster

I wish I had the parts to build the computer I want.

[Cheddarius]

Granted. However, you are suddenly struck with a mental disorder that renders you completely unable to build or even use a computer.

I wish for a pony.

[Keita]

Granted, but it is an undead pony and chases you around, wishing to consume your soul