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[dragnar]

Granted: you are now addicted to another anime.
(My avatar's hat says Rozen Maiden on it! The creator of the comic it's from loves that show)

I wish to mine 4 fish.

[Phantom]

Granted. You Mine the 4fishmetal. It explodes and you die.

I wish I have proof you guys are filled with never ending hate towards me.

[Sensei]

Granted. No, John- you are have never ending hate towards you.

...but seriously, nobody here has a never-ending hate towards you. We have a whilst-you're-saying-stupid-things-moderate-contempt-towards-you. Jakkarra did once too, but he did a  good job a shedding it.

I wish to have cash4wood, cash for your unneeded wood and tree products now!

[Phantom]

Granted, but the elves raid you for the wood.

I wish for a shotgun with 12 shells in case zombies attack. And that you guys vever find out my 72 plans to survive one.

[Lord Dakoth]

Granted, however they are seashells, not shotgun shells. The barrel jams as zombified Bay12 members squish you to the ground, and a zombified Chapain the Dwarf and Emperor_Jonathan taunt you endlessly by calling you Master Chief.

I wish that derails didn't happen so easily.

[Phantom]

Granted, but it happens anyway in New VN.

I wish that those zombies were more focused on devouring the flesh of the living instead of taunting.

[dragnar]

Granted: specifically, your flesh.

I wish for a fully functional chainsaw and a shotgun, and the skillz to use them. Because nothing kills zombies like a chainsaw

[Phantom]

Granted, but the chains get stuck in the flesh of one, and the sound attracts more zombies... Your shotgun isn't useful either, because its a double barrel shotgun.

I wish for the following things: A zombie infestation. An  Assault Rifle. 9 Assault Rifle clips. A fortified building.

[LeoLeonardoIII]

Granted. The clips and rifle are all empty, and it's a weird assault rifle made in Uzbekistan and you have zero chance of ever finding ammo for it.

The fortified building is impenetrable. Nothing can get in or out. You are inside. So are all the zombies.

I wish for a bunch of comedy!

[dragnar]

Granted: watch the fate you just sentenced phantom to! You even get to do so from inside the building!

I wish for an uncorrupted wish.

[LeoLeonardoIII]

Granted. You just wasted your one and only wish on asking for a wish ... sort of like asking someone if you can ask a question. It's not corrupted, just useless, and in that sense the corruption of your intent qualifies for the thread.

[Rozenbuddy]

Oh SHNAWP! You didn't but a wish! You torture me so...

I wish people would remember to put wishes under the corruption of their wish so that it may be corrupted by the hoping replicates, and everyone else.

[Neruz]

Wish granted, i remember to put a wish under this wish, for two seconds, then i forget.

[Rozenbuddy]

GRawgafrawg!

I wish everyone would dance now.

[LeoLeonardoIII]

Granted. They dance on you and it is uncomfortable and embarrassing. Arrrr.

I wish pirates around the world would cast off their eyepatches and BE HEEE-ALED!