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[Mathel]

Granted. Your dental implant finishes healing itself. And then starts growing it's own body.

I wish for skulls.

[King Zultan]

Granted, you receive a box in the mail that contains the skulls of your closest relatives.

I wish for something.

[A_Curious_Cat]

Granted, you receive a box in the mail that contains the skulls of your closest relatives.

I wish for something.

Granted.  You receive nothing (which is, in fact, technically “something” when you think about it).

I wish someone would start another gridhood game.

[Mathel]

Granted. Someone starts it, but it never lives up to the expectations.

I wish for the blaze of a thousand stars to be tamed by mankind.

[ArchimedesWojak]

The inferno is tamed for 2 nanoseconds

i wish for banana bread

[Yellow Pixel]

Granted. But the banana bread has been made with an inordinate amount of baking soda.

I wish I would be a leopard.

[Mathel]

Granted. While riding in public transport you suddenly turn into a leopard. You are quickly killed by someone with a gun to protect other passangers.

I wish to have a diamond edged steel knife.

[King Zultan]

Granted, it's incredibly sharp and cuts through things effortlessly, which is something you observe first hand when you accidentally cut off your fingers with it.

I wish for a knife that can't cut off my fingers or stab me.

[A_Curious_Cat]

Granted!  It’s incased in 5 meter cube of concrete at the bottom of the Mariana Trench. Along with your arm, which still holding it.

I wish the “you’re on an Airplane” thread in the “Roll To Dodge” sub-forum was updated.

[Dunamisdeos]

The thread has been updated. It's now the second Ameripol thread.

I wish for superpowers.

[Yellow Pixel]

Granted. You gain all superpowers imaginable, but your body cannot sustain such tremendous level of power, and the whole universe explodes.

I wish to have a magic mirror allowing me to see the future.

[King Zultan]

The thread has been updated. It's now the second Ameripol thread.

(God I hope not.)

Granted, but it only shows futures where the world ends because of dolphins.

I wish for a future that doesn't evolve evil dolphins.

[Mathel]

Granted. It does instead involve evil whales taking over Wales, then Earth.

I wish for a future, where the only evil terrans are humans and cats.

[WillowLuman]

Granted. These are also the only Terrans.

I wish for a new blouse

[A_Curious_Cat]

Granted.  Unfortunately, you forgot to take off the inventory control tag in the changing room and it just set off the alarm as you walked outside.

I wish for a ping pong ball, rope, and a feather duster.